One fine morning, you turn on your loved one's laptop or tablet, and his intimate correspondence opens up to your eyes. No, no, not with you, but with some charming Masha. Virtual betrayal in the era of information technology will not surprise anyone. Quite often, men like beautiful strangers on social networks, lying in bed with their beloved wife. They correspond with Lena and Masha, looking at photos in a bikini, showering in compliments and declarations of love. Astro7 experts figured out whether such behavior can be considered treason and what the injured party should do.

Virtual betrayal is no different from real. Faced with her, the injured party experiences no less unpleasant emotions than if she saw her husband in real life in bed with some blonde. You feel how the ground is slipping from under your feet, your self-confidence is disappearing, betrayal and deceit hurt your heart. It seems like, and treason is not real, but still - treason. To the question "What to do?" there is no clear answer. Every woman has her own recipe for getting out of this situation. Someone prefers not to look at the spouse’s phone or tablet at all, according to the principle “the less you know, the better you sleep.” Complete trust is a wonderful thing, but only until you accidentally see a message from some stranger. The second category unconditionally believes the spouse, who swears that this happened for the first and last time in his life. They believe that a person who has been on a dating site for a year will change his addictions in one evening. They believe exactly until the moment they decide to check the archive in the tablet again. There is another category that considers frivolous communication in social networks to be something normal. “Well, I won’t be jealous of him for a sultry mulatto living on the other side of the globe?” A friend who doesn’t want to change anything in life justifies her calmness. But most often, the virtual betrayal of a husband hurts even more than the real one, because they cheat on you, being very close. You understand that while you were putting the kids to bed, your spouse was texting some Masha, flirting or frankly having virtual sex with her.

From virtual romance to real treason

From virtual romance to real betrayal is one step. Simply due to the fact that at some point the “lovers” decide to make a real meeting in order to look at the one (the one) who sent seductive photos for so long and spoke frankly about her addictions. It is interesting that in modern women the propensity for risk and real betrayal is higher than that of men. It is the woman in such a relationship that can initiate the meeting, hoping to bite off a "tidbit". So it is hardly worth believing that the matter ended with only one correspondence. Cheating on the Internet is not much different from the real one in nature. It compensates a person for what he lacks in real relationships. Experts are sure that no one will go to social networks if harmony, tenderness and passion reign in his relationship. Someone lacks simple attention, compliments and declarations of love, someone has problems in the sexual sphere. It often happens that a partner cheats because of emotional trauma, sexual manipulation, or financial dependence. Routine sticks, there is no novelty in marriage, no thrill, flirting and passion.

What to do if you have been cheated on?

There is no universal advice on what to do to the injured party. L. Tolstoy wrote: "All happy families are alike, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." But we can still advise something: To begin with, do not violate personal boundaries by looking at your loved one's phone or tablet. This behavior indicates your insecurity, low self-esteem and anxiety. If you saw the correspondence, do not rush to make a huge scandal. Anger, jealousy, disappointment, envy - a “cocktail” of such emotions will definitely not return a warm relationship to a family. Sleep with this thought, if you can not sleep after such news at home - book a room in a good hotel. In the morning, take a piece of paper and honestly answer the following questions: - Why do I live with him? Because of love, children or financial dependence? What do I want from this relationship? Do I have any prospects? - What is the reason for the virtual betrayal of the spouse? When was the last time I complimented him, admired and supported him? And he?
When you are categorical, do not dissuade yourself. It is better to make a difficult decision once than to doubt the fidelity of your soulmate all your life and cry into your pillow at night. If you are ready to forgive, talk frankly with your spouse. Ask him what he lacks in marriage, what he feels for another woman, whether family relationships are important to him. In cases where a calm conversation does not work, use the services of a professional psychologist. Of course, we talked about the general outlines of the problem. If you are confused in a relationship, do not know whether to forgive or leave, use the individual advice of Astro7 experts.

- He's cheating on me!

- Why You decided so?

- I saw the correspondence in ICQ ...

- Are you sure that all this takes place in reality, and not just on the network?

“What difference does it make to me!?” He has a romance!

It's no secret that a separate concept has long existed - Internet culture. There are special forms of communication, slang, specific humor and programs and resources designed for this. It seems to some that all this is unnatural - surrogate friendship, virtual tea drinking and emotions shown in the form of standard "smilies". But it's not so simple. Digging deeper, you find out that this phenomenon has reasons.

Features of the novel on the web

When a virtual romance came up in the consultation center, I always asked the question: “did you want / were you ready to meet your virtual partner in reality?” And most often heard "no". I repeat, now we are not talking about those who use the network for real dating and are not limited in any way in their development, but about those whose personal life is “arranged”, and who, nevertheless, are looking for online dating. But leaves them to live only in the virtual world.

Andrei, 37 years old, has been corresponding with a girl from another city for a year now. Communicate on ICQ, in blogs, by e-mail. One day the wife found a piece of this correspondence. According to her, all this was very reminiscent of their correspondence at the beginning of their acquaintance. She was genuinely offended. When she brought her husband with her to the consultation, he did not deny it. “Yes, I am texting. And no more. And women read romance novels and sometimes imagine themselves in the place of heroines. And with other men. And what? Should this literature be banned? What is the difference? We're not going to bring this to reality. Just like my wife, fantasies about romance novels.

Strong argument, don't you think? During the consultation, we found out that for Andrei this is a kind of “psychotherapy”. In those difficult moments when they quarrel with his wife, he temporarily disappears from the "battlefield" behind the computer. Half an hour of meaningless exchange of remarks with a girl for whom he is just a pen pal (she also has a personal life), and quarrels with his wife cease to hurt him so much. Moreover, refreshed by the approval of the virtual girlfriend, he is ready to approach his wife and ask for forgiveness. Or at least thanks to correspondence and switching emotions, it is tactful to take a break in communication with your wife and not develop a quarrel further.

Purpose of virtual flirting

From the point of view of psychology, this is a form of role-playing game, modeling. There is some part of a person that others do not want to see or notice. Or it is simply obscured by other qualities.

Suppose relatives are accustomed to the fact that a person is cold. And even if he has developed over time the ability to express feelings, the people around him sometimes simply refuse to notice this due to habit, a stereotype of human perception. They don't see that he has changed. He naturally seeks an adequate response to these changes. And he finds that it is in front of a virtual interlocutor that he can fully reveal his new qualities. Another option: a person tries to become someone, something, to acquire some kind of status or quality. But those around him do not believe in him, the world around him, as it were, does not give him such an opportunity, as if a label is hung on him. And then he appears before someone unfamiliar on the network exactly the way he would like to see himself.

One of the very strong laws of psychology is simple: if you model the desired situation in detail, with a strong emotional inclusion, then this technique can greatly increase the likelihood of its implementation.

It is precisely this technique that underlies the mass of psychotechnics. And the stronger it is, the more a real person reacts to your “picture”. In therapeutic groups, people help each other by playing out an adequate resonance for the other. But not everyone has the opportunity and desire to go to groups. And intuitively a person is looking for a way. And finds him.

Finals

But the endings are different. Do you remember the movie "Do you have a letter?" Some situation, stress, quarrel, trauma can push a person to suddenly seek real contact with a virtual interlocutor. And this can have a lot of consequences. From disappointment and rejection to sudden real love. Both of these can be fatal.

Galina, 27 years old, at 22 You got married, had a baby. After some time, she realized that her husband had not taken her seriously for a long time - he was taking care of the child, but he somehow lived without much regard for her. Although I didn't want to change anything. She was not going to either - the child needs a father, there are no reasons to get divorced. But she began to look for spiritual and even erotic contact on the net. It didn’t occur to her to start a real affair on the side - in her understanding, this meant putting the family at risk. She hoped that things would get better. But she needed warmth. And the network became You move. Correspondence went well with a man who also had a family - it suited her. And then there was a blow - she finds out that her husband has another side on the side, for three years now. In a fit of desperation, she tries to see her virtual friend. They start dating. But after a while, he makes her understand that it is necessary to put an end to this. Like, they've gone too far. She resists - they understand each other so well on all levels, she is in love! And he still continues to play virtual therapy - for him all this was not and could not be serious. There is no point in talking about further events. I can only say one thing - it took a year and a half of regular classes just to somehow restore her peace of mind. And the treatment continues to this day.

The person in the network is a living person. you are not communicating with a robot, and even if each of you plays a certain therapeutic role, living on the network an unlived own image, a piece of life that has not been lived, helping another to do the same, you still must not forget: life is real and in it anything can happen.

Who your virtual interlocutor will become is up to you. If you are careful and tactful, if you clearly define the boundaries and think not only about yourself, you may later thank him for his help. And if you play too much and forget to think about him as a living person, then perhaps he will become a bitter disappointment and trauma for you.

And for those who found their husbands / wives for virtual flirting, you should first think - what do they not see in a loved one? What makes him live some kind of parallel life, why is he looking for a different perception of himself? And if you are sensitive to him, if you know how to respond to his changes and, then he will only communicate on the network. And don't flirt.

I have such a problem...

My "second half" has already bothered me with her dissolute behavior... what does it have both in real life and in virtual...
The bottom line is ... you can’t leave one alone even for two minutes, because even in the women’s campaign she manages to dig up men and crawl up to them ... she sits on the Internet on a dating site, while she is systematically shown signs of attention (with a clearly not friendly hint ), I see it all, I tell her, the response is zero ...
I personally call this behavior "easily accessible"...
How many did not speak with her in response to some scandals, in which, at the same time, she herself blames me ...
Tell me what to do with this "miracle" ...
I can’t quit, you yourself understand "Love is evil, you will fall in love and ....."

This guy's mistake is that he does not understand the specifics of female infidelity: for him, her flirting, active communication with men on dating sites and social networks is not a betrayal. After all, probably there was no physical contact yet? Or was?

Women's "virtual" betrayal most often develops according to the scenario described below.

The first and most important starting point is a woman's loss of respect for her man, the loss of a sense of her own belonging to him as a man, a male. The instinct of a woman ceases to perceive a man nearby as the owner of the proper rank. As we know, this process is practically irreversible: if the consciousness of a woman can be convinced of the objective merits and profitability of this man for her, then the instinct cannot be forced to perceive a man as a high-ranking one - a woman feels his inferiority. And, although the instinct can be deceived (which often happens during the search for a man and the analysis of his attractiveness), it will not work to control the instinctive female "quotation reduction" of a particular man. It is for this reason that the return or resumption of relations destroyed due to "instinctive disappointment" is a hopeless and practically hopeless business.

Perhaps the woman initially did not have deep feelings for the man, but was formally with him due to some pragmatic, mercantile reasons. In this case, it is unlikely that she was faithful to him, and it makes no sense to talk about treason.

Be that as it may, but at this stage, the man next to him does not have the male attractiveness recognized by the female instinct. He was either "disqualified" or did not possess it. The woman goes into "search mode" for a new male (male). This is not always and not necessarily a state perceived by the consciousness of a woman. But, as we know, a woman is a highly primative being, her behavior is guided more by instincts than by reason.

After "turning on" the "search mode", physical betrayal is, in fact, only a matter of time. As they say, "a matter of technology." Cheating ALREADY happened in the woman's head, she ALREADY imagined herself with another, albeit imaginary, man. It is important that mentally a woman ALREADY does not belong to her nominal man, a guy, internally she has already freed herself from any obligations in relation to him. But women are pragmatic, practical creatures, finding themselves in such a situation, they are not at all in a hurry to announce their departure, give up their usual way of life, benefits, until she gains confidence in a new man. This behavior is described in detail in the chapter "The principle of a branch line and the" alternate airfield. on the one hand, in an almost irreversible "search mode", and on the other hand, in the non-announcement of the upcoming breakup, and confuses men when they subsequently try to analyze what happened.

The main mistake of a man is the inability to see, recognize the activated "search mode" of his woman and the misunderstanding that his "turning on" means the end of the relationship and a very likely physical betrayal in the foreseeable future.

What does the search mode look like? Perhaps, in our time of the Internet, which has penetrated almost all spheres of our life, a very characteristic behavior is the constant sitting on social networks and dating sites. This is very convenient: after all, formally, a man has nothing to complain about. When questions arise, a woman can easily laugh it off and convince her man of the innocence of such a pastime.

"Before the advent of the Internet, being unfaithful to a partner meant only one thing: dating another person and having sex with him. Now people can easily start new romantic relationships online. They can send each other emails, compliments in instant messages, or even have virtual sex."

I have read several already sensational articles about the detrimental effect of social networks and dating sites on the number of adultery and the strength of existing couples. Most of them, alas, draw the wrong conclusions, taking the technical means, which are social networks and dating sites, as a source of trouble.

A man who noticed his woman "hanging" on dating sites should not only take note of this fact, but prepare for the end of the relationship. The reason why I give this advice with such categoricalness is described above: the activated "search mode" will certainly sooner or later result in physical treason, if it has not already happened and is not happening. Don't believe a woman who tells you that she is "just having fun" on a dating site! Even if she is not fully aware of this, she is ALREADY comparing and looking for a replacement for you. A replacement will definitely be found, not necessarily now and on this dating site. It is important to understand the main thing - a woman with varying degrees of awareness has already rejected you and is in "search mode".

Another likely sign of "search mode" is a strange increase in trips with unmarried (divorced) girlfriends to various entertainment places, clubs, restaurants. Here options are possible: say, not "girlfriends", but "decided to sit with the girls after work, drink beer / wine / coffee." Pay attention, these girlfriends will be either single, or the same ladies in the implicit "search mode". Agree that the normal state of a woman living with a man is to strive to go home after work, to spend most of the evenings with him. Of course, there can and should be rare exceptions to the rule - it's all a matter of frequency.

It is highly likely that after a while you will begin to notice that your wife or girlfriend goes to talk to someone in another room, hides the phone from you, takes it with you to the toilet and bathroom and / or receives an excessive amount of incoming text messages. messages that are deleted immediately after reading.

When you try to sort out the situation after your woman is convicted in SMS correspondence with a man, you will most likely hear all the same assurances of the "innocence" of virtual communication.

According to the experience of ABF, most modern men in situations like those described tend to console themselves with the thought that "nothing happened." Perhaps there was no physical betrayal yet. Moreover, the woman, it seems, repented and "promised not to do that again." I assure you that there is no reason for optimism: internally you are already "merged" by a woman, she just does not yet have a "new branch" to cling to, is not ready to part with you right now. Yes, she may be genuinely remorseful. But believe me, not in relation to you, but in the fact that she so stupidly “burned out” before the virtual “prince” materializes at her feet.

Men who have experienced a "counterattack" in the style of "I sat in" classmates "and I will sit, look even more stupid, you won't tell me how to spend my free time!" After all, those to whom women successfully feed this are definitely not even honored with formal respect.

"Search mode" will definitely be implemented in the face of a new man sooner or later. So isn't it better for you to manage the end of this relationship yourself, and not passively wait for a shameful, but, alas, inevitable ending?

Good day, friends! I have been reading your site for a long time, I never commented and would not have thought that I would have to ask for help myself.

I am married, have been married for 11 years, we are raising two children. The story is extremely banal: the wife conducts cozy correspondence and phone calls with one horseradish. They met in an online game. We chatted there, I cleared this case, there was a scandal, they stopped it. Then they switched to Odnoklassniki, again the same. Oaths and promises, that's all. After - on the telephone, stopped. A year has passed, and here again there are suspicious calls (I found out purely by chance, my wife is awesomely encrypted). The result is the same type, a virtual Casanova, 1000 km away from us. In appearance - complete garbage, in the face of a freak and skinny, besides, he is married and the father of two children. My wife swears that this is just friendship, I understand that you can’t physically change over 1000 km, but it pisses me off. Question: What are you talking about? “The game, this and that, just about everything.”

I looked at the online history of her calls (because the phone cleans up) - calls at 8 in the morning, and in the afternoon, and 10 minutes before my arrival, stupidly impatient to talk in a friendly way, fuck).

The fact is that a couple of years ago, my wife began to write to her ex, he reacted lazily, correspondence was conducted, I stopped her and did not interfere in her personal life for a long time. And then this “object”, already different, not familiar to her, again. I understand that this is a dead end, I’ll bring it into her phone in an emergency, put a password, call, be rude, but what’s the point? Find another object. By nature, the wife is calm, not temperamental, secretive. Sex she needs quite a bit, but regularly to the extent possible. We have separate housing, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I’m slowly swinging, there’s no excess with finances, but I’ve never felt a lack, I’ll open my own business soon, I don’t offend my wife, what else does she need?

Do you believe in history?

True 0 Not true 0

2016-12-27T11:19:07+00:00

Why do you need to know, what else does she need"? Your business is to be a normal husband, her worthy wife. She doesn’t want, she can’t, she wants someone besides her husband? Flag in hand and success on other members. And reproach yourself for the fact that your wife has slutty inclinations, so there An effective method to stop the intake of calcium is divorce.

2016-12-26T09:32:17+00:00

A good wife lives for her husband, not for herself. Yes, and 1000 km should not reassure you, you never know what he does there, who works and what kind of person he is, he will pass by and the job will be done. Rest assured.

2016-12-26T07:10:31+00:00

2016-12-26T06:56:28+00:00

I understand that this is a dead end, I will bring it into the emergency situation on her phone, put a password, call, be rude, but what's the point?
Find another object.


- That's it)))


through communication people get closer


- And this is the result of communication, who is bored)))


what else does she need?


- this is the communication you need, not even sex, but the confidential communication that you do not give her.

• 2016-12-26T06:27:11+00:00

  You are being dumped. Still in the brain, but the question of a real drain is only a matter of time. 1000 km. no reason to relax. You can find a million reasons to break loose for a day or two (DR with an overnight stay with your beloved friend, take the children to their grandparents, a "friend" can carve out a minute and rush to the mating somewhere in a hotel). If he wants to scold you, he will do it, and you will not prevent it in any way. It was encrypted very well, and now it will go completely underground. Your threats and exhortations do not sober her up, she is not afraid of them. It is necessary that something REALLY be done to get her to the liver. Say that now you will live with her in a civil marriage and file for divorce. She will be smart, you can always re-seal the registry office. It won't - part of the job is done. AND REMOVE YOUR ASSETS! God saves the safe, otherwise you will be left with a bare ass on the street.

  2016-12-26T02:17:44+00:00

  You ain't gonna change a damn thing here.
  A man himself launches into his brains any
  crap and until he wants to get rid of it,
  and consciously, and not just promising someone
  for excuses, nothing will work. your wife
  it looks like it is otmazyvaetsya, not wanting at all
  terminate this connection. She's all there with her head
  although the body is still with you, here, but it's not for long,
  they will find an opportunity to meet, be calm.
  Your case is not unique, now it's easy,
  Yes, and you yourself write that this is not the first time with her.
  So one time it can be an accident,
  but the second, this is clearly not a "trifle".
  And the fact that he is drisch drisch, married and has two children, do not flatter yourself. It looks like he knows how to ride well on the ears,
  especially for those who really want it, and yours is
  of these and clearly in the search.
  I remember the story of one dude with ABF,
  when he suspected his wife, opened her
  correspondence and within a few months
  observed. There, too, at first one seems to be
  harmless blah blah was, but more further,
  until declarations of love and passionate
  desire to meet, although periodically
  slipped - no, I'm married and (attention)
  I think I love my husband, BUT after a while
  it seems and love to the fuck is gone and started
  phone sex with mutual exchange of intimate
  photo. Well, when they were in the south, the little wife
  agreed on arrival with them for a specific
  date poe .... nis with this pretzel, by the way, too
  miserable drisch, besides, nifuya is idle and
  sitting on an elderly mother's neck.
  Realizing what kind of bitch he was dealing with, the dude decided her
  break hard. It was on that very day
  pulled her out to a restaurant, having a good drink and a snack
  announced that he was divorcing her because she f .... and
  knows everything about her. Well, naturally, the crawling began
  on my knees, tears, snot, "forgive me fool",
  "I love only you" and "think about the child."
  But all in vain, yet it was sent, for neh,
  just like them, when this whole canoe started,
  there was a conversation on this topic, without specifics with
  in order to prevent a negative development of the situation.
  She was frankly expressed his attitude
  to adultery and how he will act if
  God forbid this happens, but she swore and swore,
  that shares his point of view. But as it turned out
  selflessly pi .... la, for which she was severely punished.
  

  2016-12-25T23:14:35+00:00

  "Yes, she just lacks emotions, that's all."

  The devil (precisely)) knows them.)) Emotions are not enough, but at the same time "not fish nor fowl." Maybe she does not need emotions from you? The ass suits and okay. 1000 km. Well, the distance is sufficient to avoid nonsense. Warms her communication "left". Well, like "a single woman is one who has only a husband. And she not only has you, but there is also ... he is, but he is not.
  But this is on a whim.

  In general, of course, somehow ... how alien you are to her. Maybe not you, but anyone who will be around. Somehow... she is with you, but she is not with you.
  Reminds me of the wife of one of my friends. Here is the first comparison that came at the moment. They got divorced. But before that, she told him ... And she didn’t need anything either. She got married, gave birth to a child ... that's all. She didn't need anything else, or anyone else. Same sex...

  2016-12-25T23:03:40+00:00

  A small update of the situation: after the previous troubles, there were long conversations, her confessions, consciousnesses, my moralizing.
  This time I didn't say anything at all for days. She was the first to speak, repented again, I demanded to call and stop everything, otherwise I will call.
  Called, the other end said "I understand" and hung up.
  And for how long? Maybe this "fucking innocent friendly mother of his so communication" infuriates me in vain, but I will not allow my wife to lisp about who knows what dick.
  There was a thought - maybe a local, just a fake page in classmates. He broke everything - a complete coincidence, he, his family, wife, etc. glow over that city.

The web is an amazing invention of mankind. It has become not only a source of useful information for eternally sleepy students and boring scientists, as intended, but also created an alternative reality in which it is so pleasant to dissolve, to lose track of time. Social networks, online chats, closed groups are full of tempting offers "Beautiful boys and girls of the city are hungry for communication", "I'm bored, let's have fun, write to me."

But the virtual betrayal of her husband causes very real resentment, disappointment, the anger of the wife, the desire to throw all the gadgets out the window and throw a tantrum?

What does virtual acquaintance mean, is it worth it to be afraid? Virtual communication certainly has its advantages. A variety of partners, the ability to easily find people with similar interests. Convenience - the chance to have several novels at the same time without leaving home. Thrift - no spending on expensive gifts, dinners at a restaurant, cinema tickets, travel. The whole simple arsenal of an online boyfriend is a couple of compliments, cute pictures, quotes worn to holes and emoticons. Just get rid of the annoying interlocutor in one click without quarrels, explanations, discussions. No obligations, restrictions, complete freedom of action.

Anonymity, the ability to create an ideal image under a mysterious nickname, to make a good impression by impersonating a stranger is an excellent ground for flirting, which can develop into virtual treason. This side of the coin is so attractive that some believe that Wirth it is harmless fun, entertainment, a way to relax after a hard day's work.

Disadvantages: the interlocutor is usually married. A long relationship leads to emotional addiction, idealization, the emergence of trust in a fictional image, the illusion of kinship, love. It seems that the person on the other side of the monitor is more attentive, understanding, tolerant than the legal spouse. Remember, it is easier for us to open up, to talk about problems, experiences to a stranger, a random fellow traveler, than to relatives. This brings strangers together, creates the illusion of a “soul mate”.

Virtual communication is a surrogate for real communication, based on imagination, instincts.

It is addictive, addictive, when real life seems paler, more boring, more monotonous, and a fictional character imperceptibly displaces, oppresses a real person.

There is also the threat of cooling to a real partner. Unpleasant fame in the form of a Youtube video hero, if a person used a camera, a microphone, or distributed screenshots of correspondence, photos with offensive comments among acquaintances, if hackers hacked the computer. There are cases of extortion of a large sum for not distributing indecent details of online dates. Perhaps a recent casual acquaintance will turn out to be one of the manic admirers, who will begin to terrorize with calls, threaten, and persecute. The anonymity factor does not guarantee personal security, since it is easy to calculate all the necessary data, including the home address, thanks to the user's IP address.

Is adultery possible over the Internet?

British scientists conducted a survey among young people. 51% agreed that virtual sex is cheating. This theory was confirmed by studies of brain regions. Watching erotic videos caused the activation of the same zones responsible for sexual arousal as an attractive girl. According to statistics, every third novel in the network eventually develops into a regular relationship.

But visiting dating sites, closed groups with suspicious content is not always a reason for sadness. Perhaps the spouse was not driven by lust, but by elementary curiosity. Psychologists say that married people sometimes continue to be interested in sex life outside of their own relationship. This phenomenon can manifest itself as a fascination of girls with soap series with rather frank scenes of love, and even in the pathological desire of both sexes for self-satisfaction.

Most people occasionally visit pornographic sites. "Films for adults" is rather a search for diversity, a kind of inspiration, the realization of secret erotic dreams, animal impulses on the Internet, and not a virtual betrayal of her husband. Agree, the stronger sex can be forgiven for this little weakness, such is nature.

But if a man sits at a computer for days, as if he doesn’t have remote work, an unfinished accounting report that he promised to finish on Monday, then it’s worth considering. Reason for excitement - private correspondence, passwords, erased browsing history in the browser. Openly discuss without offense, presenting, reproaches, what does a virtual hobby mean for him? A partner who is satisfied with a sexual relationship does not need to look for an alternative on the net, to run away from reality into pleasant dreams. Such a symptom clearly indicates the presence of problems, the need to work on marriage.

Five types of Wirth lovers

By analogy with gamblers, psychologists distinguish the following types:

1. The first is an occasional guest. Wirth for a person - a one-time activity, just an unusual experience.
2. The second one uses online sex for pleasure, is able to control himself, has ordinary intimate relationships with his wife, has work, studies, hobbies, friends.
3. The third is a risk group, has an addiction, it is difficult to control oneself.
4. Fourth - pathology, inappropriate behavior, aggression, apathy, loss of interest in life, problems with loved ones, isolation, secrecy.
5. Fifth - thirsty for salvation, comfort, restoration after loss, for example, divorce.

It is useful to visit a family psychologist, a sexologist with your spouse, who will help you sort out feelings, find new facets, renew romance, passion.

Become a best friend, adviser, lover. It's time to discard superstitions, grandmother's stereotypes, time to experiment, add fire, passion, novelty, diversify life. After all, no matter how wonderful the summer was, we are looking forward to rainy autumn, frosty winter, sunny spring with the magical aroma of flowering apple trees, right?

As the unsurpassed creator of the little black dress and the legendary Chanel No. 5 fragrance said:

In order to be irreplaceable, you must always be different. - Coco Chanel

Take the advice of psychologist Carl Rogers, the founder of humanistic psychology. In Marriage and Its Alternatives, he argues that family life is a constant risk, change, responsibility, work on difficult moments. The ideas of the author of the book about marriage are based on four elements, some whales of a strong family: a constant attitude to participation; sincere expression of feelings, even negative ones, that we usually try to hide; rejection of imposed other people's expectations, attempts to meet them; the ability to share the inner life of a partner, to look at the world through his eyes, to understand, to accept. These elements are a commitment, an agreement on an ideal for an ongoing wholesome marriage.

Network flirting is a litmus test of existing problems. But it happens that such an impulse becomes the starting point for development, renewal of passion for one's own wife.

A person understands that no erotic picture or doll from a computer monitor can replace the attention, care and love of a loved one.