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My boyfriend dumped my friend: what is the best way to support her? The guy left how to calm down The guy left the girl, her friends consoled her

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We often worry and worry about our friends, especially when they feel bad, and try to somehow alleviate their mental pain. If a guy left a friend and went to another, then many girls wonder what to do in such a difficult situation in order to support a loved one in word and deed. There are no quick fixes here, be patient. We'll give you some tips.

From this article you will learn:

  • What words will help in this situation?
  • What phrases should you never say to a friend who has been dumped?

How to reassure a friend if her boyfriend dumped her

Many women are faced with the problem of how to console and morally support their best friend in a difficult moment in her life. This can be very difficult, especially if the girl abandoned by her boyfriend is sensitive, nervous and prone to self-pity. Betrayal is always taken seriously, especially if you have strong feelings for the person.

True friends are always tormented themselves when a friend experiences mental pain. Therefore, upon learning that a guy has left a friend, it can be difficult to cope with one’s own anxiety so as not to upset the abandoned girl even more. However, there are a few fairly simple rules that will help you get out of this difficult situation and calm your friend down. Here they are:

    • First, listen. Let your friend talk, vent, don’t interrupt her. Let the girl feel maximum mutual understanding on your part.
    • In any way, let her know that you are not just a listener, but are ready to console your friend in a situation where her boyfriend left her, and will not let her feel lonely.
    • Of course, the best way to distract yourself is to do something. It will be very good if you invite her to take a walk in nature, in the park, on the river bank, even just on the street. The main thing is for the girl to change the situation and forget about the place associated with her ex-boyfriend. Nothing should remind her of him, so the right tactic would be to distract her and not leave her alone with depressing experiences. But don't overdo it so it looks fake.
  • What else should you say to a friend who was dumped by her boyfriend? For example, that breaking up was the only and correct decision and that you should not try to resurrect those relationships that died.
  • You can go to the spa, get a manicure, or take a yoga class together. This will be useful after eating chocolates.
  • Your friend may come up with strange ideas like shaving her head or getting a vulgar tattoo. Talk her out of it. Then, when the girl calms down, she is unlikely to be delighted with such changes.
  • Let him spend less time on social networks, especially on the page of his ex-lover. As they say, out of sight, out of mind. In order to move on in life, you don't need to look back.

How not to behave with a girlfriend who was dumped by her boyfriend

First of all, there is no need to moralize and feel sorry for your already unhappy friend - this will only emphasize her pain and complicate everything even more.

Refrain from teachings and advice. The past will not return. Your friend is an adult, so she can overcome all the problems that arise along the way.

Often, women who think about how to verbally support a friend who has been abandoned by her boyfriend begin to turn her against her ex. But this is an extremely wrong position! It would be more correct to try not to mention it at all or to reduce memories to a minimum. Shift your attention to yourself, to the positive moments in life.

Don’t take it upon yourself to immediately introduce your friend to a new guy, because she will inevitably compare him with the previous one.

Give up the phrase “You will find something better for yourself,” because until the girl’s feelings have faded away, the best thing for her remains the one who abandoned her.

Don't say that all men are assholes, otherwise your friend may begin to feel disgusted by the entire male sex. Her future personal life could suffer greatly from this.

There is no need to incite her to evil feelings or revenge. It never ends well, but it brings with it a lot of negativity.

Don't tell her stories from your own relationships with men. This topic is now unpleasant and painful. There are many other interesting neutral themes.

Never try to find solace in alcohol. Alcohol has not yet cured anyone, but it has crippled enough destinies.

If a guy dumped a friend, what words of support would be appropriate?

The following simple phrases will help you properly calm down an unhappy girl:

  • Dasha, I'm not reassuring you. Of course, what happened is not trivial. I know what it is, I was also in such a situation. I also cried like you, but time heals everything. Believe me, girlfriend, everything will pass.
  • Katya, when your beloved guy betrays you, it is very difficult and difficult to calm down. It’s okay, men leave us girls, but we only become stronger. Now he seems to be the only one to you, but over time you will not think so. Probably fate itself deceived you, and no one is to blame.
  • Nastya, your boyfriend doesn’t even know who he left. Remember the boomerang law? Everything done comes back. You won’t believe it, but tomorrow you will perceive everything completely differently. It's just always hard at first. We must endure this time. Been through.
  • Irka, do you think I can’t understand you? I was also abandoned when I needed help and support. Pull yourself together and try to rethink your relationship. Everything is for the better, time will dot all the i’s. Suddenly you didn’t lose anything, but, on the contrary, gained.
  • Kira, I’m not saying that Oleg is bad in any way, and you have nothing to do with it. Any separation should be cried out and forgotten forever, but only time can help with this. I, as your loved one, will just be there.

Don’t feel like you have the right to judge a guy who dumped your girlfriend, because she still loves him. Any word against him now could hurt her. Your task is to show understanding and provide the necessary support.

What not to say to a friend who was dumped by her boyfriend

Did your boyfriend leave your girlfriend? There are phrases that can cause great harm in this situation. Only when you hate a woman and wish her harm can you say something like this:

  • “It’s your own fault”—that’s all your abandoned friend needed to hear now.
  • “He’s a cool guy, and he’ll easily find someone else,” “You didn’t deserve someone like him.”
  • “I think what you did was wrong,” “You made a big mistake.”
  • “You will never have a relationship like this again in your life.”

Similar phrases hurt your pride, forget about them. Even if you really think that your friend and not her boyfriend is to blame for everything, then keep your opinion to yourself. It’s better to let her come to this conclusion herself, without your participation. This will help her somehow change the current situation.

Advice from a psychologist on what to do if your best friend is dumped by your boyfriend

There is one very interesting method that is recommended by many practicing psychologists. Encourage your friend to start solving the problem through “writing work.” Let him take a notepad and pen and begin to engage in an important, albeit morally difficult procedure.

The sheet should be divided into three parts: in the first you will write down what positive things your friend lost with the departure of her loved one, in the second - what is good in the current situation, in the third you should try to outline your plans for the future. Let's say that after the guy leaves, the girl has to while away the evenings alone. This time can be turned into a useful and productive vacation, because there will always be things to do that you never got around to doing before. For example, read some necessary books, start (or continue) learning English, take up a hobby, go to the pool, join a fitness club, meet old friends with whom you still haven’t been able to meet. This will perfectly distract you from sad experiences, and will also improve your figure, which is quite good.

At the same time, the friend must understand that her ex has not gone away and lives in the same city as her. At any moment she could accidentally meet him in a store, a park, or anywhere. Let her ask herself whether she wants to appear before him in the form of a faded, drooping, saggy plain woman with the unhappy look of an abandoned woman? Most likely no. And how pleasant it will be to see his amazement when his ex in excellent shape flashes past and makes him doubt whether he was right when he decided to part with such a beauty.

5 Movies That Will Make Breakup Pain Less Severe

How to help a friend who was dumped by her boyfriend? After all, something like this is not easily forgotten, and it takes time to heal a wounded heart. This is the best doctor. It’s wonderful when there are those nearby who can understand and support you morally: friends, close people. It’s also very good when movies lift your spirits. Advise your friend to watch them, or even better, do it together, because it’s always more interesting with company!

  • "Exchange Vacation"

Romance is what is needed now. The film reminds us of the different types of love that exist on our earth. Kate Winslet in the film plays the role of Iris, who fell in love with a man who does not reciprocate her feelings. Cameron Diaz's heroine, Amanda, was abandoned by a young man. Amanda and Iris decide to switch houses for the holidays and gradually realize that finding true love is a little more difficult than people think. This is one of the best films for that state of mind when your whole life seems like a continuous black stripe.

  • “Promising does not mean marrying”

Romantic comedy. Although it is light, it raises very difficult questions that every girl has asked herself at least once in her life. Why is he indifferent? Why doesn’t he call or make plans together? Why doesn't he finally marry me? Does he really just not like you? This is exactly the name of the funny book by the scriptwriters of the famous TV series “Sex and the City”, on which this movie was based. And if her boyfriend no longer likes the girl, then she will have to break up.

  • "War of the Roses"

Why not laugh, because a sea of ​​​​tears has already been cried, it’s time to know the honor. Tell your friend to “stop crying” and show her this movie. A black comedy whose title in English sounds like “War of the Roses”, referring to the War of the Scarlet and White Roses. An ordinary quarrel between a husband (Michael Douglas) and wife (Kathleen Turner) suddenly escalates into an apocalypse. Douglas accidentally kills Turner's cat, and she wants to give him dog meat pate in revenge. This film is exactly what you need when you want to smash plates, destroy walls at home and punch your ex-lover in the head.

  • "Redemption"

A spectacular film directed by Joe Wright based on the book of the same name by Ian McEwan about a love that is not meant to be. The action begins in England, back in 1935. Older sister Cecilia (Keira Knightley) and younger sister Briony (Saoirse Ronan) spend the summer at their country house. Briony, who wants to be a writer, watches Cecilia's fling with the gardener's son Robbie (James McAvoy). Briony will separate careless lovers, but she will also reunite them. It's a pity, though, that they won't find out. A very sad film, but light and for those who want to cry - the ideal medicine.

  • "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"

Serious role by Jim Carrey. Just warn your friend in advance that this movie may make her think that the guy who dumped her is actually her betrothed. Kerry plays the role of Joel Barish, and his girlfriend Clementine plays Kate Winslet. They both realize that their relationship is not very successful, and then they simply decide to destroy their memories. But fate cannot be changed, Clementine and Joel fall in love again!

If a girl wants to return the young man who abandoned her, recommend watching this video by relationship expert Yaroslav Samoilov:

Thank you for reading this article to the end.

Hello, my name is Yaroslav Samoilov. I am an expert in the psychology of relationships and over the years of practice I have helped more than 10,000 girls meet worthy soul mates, build harmonious relationships and return love and understanding to families that were on the verge of divorce.

More than anything, I am inspired by the happy eyes of students who meet the people of their dreams and enjoy a truly vibrant life.

My goal is to show women a way to develop relationships that will help them create a synergy of success and happiness!

The situation is perhaps close and familiar to women, because it is necessary to support the best friend who, for some reason, was abandoned by her boyfriend. This can be a difficult, almost impossible task, especially if the unfortunate friend is very suspicious, has strong feelings for the person who betrayed her and has a tendency to be hysterical. So what to do in this case? How to console? After all, it is quite difficult to find the right words, and conversation is exactly what an inconsolable friend needs in such a situation.

How to support a friend who broke up with her boyfriend? Morally!

This is not only difficult, but often very difficult for the comforter herself, because if her friendship is sincere, she will certainly feel the pain tormenting her friend’s heart. And then the question is no longer , how to support a friend who broke up with her boyfriend, but how to cope with your own anxiety and not upset her even more. Naturally, everything should be tied to dialogue. The problem is not how to start it, there will be no problems with that, but in choosing the right words.

Breakup... How to support a friend who broke up with her boyfriend?

Most importantly, you should never feel sorry for your unhappy friend - this will emphasize her sad feelings and only make everything worse. It doesn’t matter how, but she needs to clearly feel full support and participation, that she is not alone and that in fact not everything is as bad as it seems.

How to support a friend who has been verbally abandoned by her boyfriend?

You need to be a good psychologist, but it is more important to remain a caring and devoted friend

In such situations, women try to turn the unfortunate woman against the guy who left her, but under no circumstances should this be done! It is better to mention it as little as possible and focus more attention on it, remembering the bright, bright moments in life.

The best words of consolation are quotes and sayings of great people that this is not a tragedy, everything is only for the better - Omar Khayyam, for example, left a rich legacy in this regard.

A friend who has been dumped by her boyfriend needs to be supported correctly! Basic Rules

Of course, distract from sad thoughts, keep you busy with something. The ideal option is to take her out into the fresh air, into nature, into the park, onto a bench near the house, it doesn’t matter where, the main thing is that she does not stay for a long time in a place associated with a former lover who resurrects him in his memories. At the same time, you need to constantly distract with something, without leaving you alone with depressing thoughts, but it is also important not to overdo it.

Basic support rules:

  1. You should never introduce your friend to a new guy, because this will cause unpleasant associations.
  2. Forget about the phrase “You will find something better for yourself,” at this moment the guy who left her will be not just the best, but the very best.
  3. No alcohol! This aggravates the sad state and does not heal at all, as is believed.

A friendly shoulder is exactly what you need.

How can a girl survive a breakup with dignity? A girl experiences a breakup very hard, especially if the first man left her. At such moments it is unclear what to do, how to continue living. How to help a friend forget a guy Sad as it may be, almost every person experiences the pain of unrequited love or the breakdown of a relationship that just yesterday seemed so strong and trusting. In such situations, one can only hope for the best healer - time. However, what to do if days, weeks, months pass, and the image of your loved one still stirs your soul and heart, preventing you from concentrating on everyday affairs? It is at such a moment that the support of a faithful friend is needed more than ever. What words to reassure a girl who has been abandoned by her beloved boyfriend * Marinka, I’m not reassuring you. And I'm not saying that this is nothing. I just know your state when your beloved guy leaves you.

Support and support: how to help a friend if her boyfriend abandoned her

How to console a friend who was abandoned by her boyfriend??? How to console a friend who was abandoned by her boyfriend??? How to learn chemistry if you don’t know it at all? tags: Chemistry Organic how to hem tulle if its bottom is treated with a weighting agent? tags: Tulle Tulle What should a woman do after 50 years old if her husband abandoned her or she is widowed? HOW to reassure a mother if her son dyed his hair (written by a 13-year-old son) And what should you write to your best friend if she is sad? So that she smiles... tags: Humor How to draw a parabola if its function is y=0.5x squared.. Reply from User deleted[guru]knocks out a wedge with a wedge! abandoned one, let him find another Answer from Un[guru]introduce him to another guy, we can switch Answer from Kaza[guru]What is the last guy on Earth? Answer from Aleksa [guru] under no circumstances let anyone talk ABOUT HIM Answer from Aleksa [guru] but you can say - of course it won’t help)) but in general, introducing someone is the easiest way...

My boyfriend dumped my girlfriend: how to support and console her

As often as possible, focus your friend’s attention on the value of her life and the opportunities that open before her. Help her find an interesting activity that can distract her from sad thoughts, and it will be especially good if this activity is common to you: you can ask your friend about her successes or ask for advice so that she can feel needed. Protect your friend from “relapses” when she suddenly wants to call her ex or “accidentally” meet him.


Until she has fully recovered from the breakup, this will not lead to anything good: her friend’s ex-lover may say nasty things to her or give her false hope of restoring the relationship. Try to talk less about your friend’s ex-boyfriend now, but if she starts talking about him, then be sure to listen, say a few sympathetic words and leave it at that.

How to console a girl whose boyfriend left her?

    Attention

    Psychology

  • Psychology
  • October 5, 2015 22:30 We've all been through this - and we didn't always know what was best to say or how to behave. It's no wonder you get confused when your friend is in tears and you can't fix anything. This cheat sheet, developed on the basis of psychological research, will tell you what a good friend should do.


    Cosmo Online editorial staff of Cosmo.ru Share with friends Join the discussion Cosmo Online Psychology Not news Getty Images
    1. First of all, prepare a vest for streams of tears. It is tempting to sigh with relief if a friend is in no hurry to pour out her soul and pretends that she is fine - but you know that this is not the case. And the sooner she speaks out, the sooner she will feel better.
    2. Unoriginal, but very important point: chocolate.

    You know everything about it: endorphins and all that.

    Anything can happen in life: how to support a friend who was abandoned by her boyfriend

    I cried too, but time wiped away all the tears. Everything will pass, just trust me. * Nadya, when you love, it’s always hard, and it’s too difficult to calm down. You know, us women are abandoned by men, and we become stronger because of it. Now it seems to you that he is the one and only.

    Info

    My boyfriend dumped me! How to recover? There's nothing you can do about it. All the posts written above are bullshit. How can you advise reading books, watching a movie, when it is simply impossible, it is not even possible to raise your hands? It’s not like breaking a nail; in fact, it’s almost like the death of your loved one. But to this pain is also added the realization that you have been abandoned.


    Week, 4 months. I lived like this for a year and a half, then He wrote. The guy gave up on how to calm down. Real girlfriends help each other, support, console, and rejoice together.

    The guy gave up how to calm down

    Gradually, the friend will understand that there is no need to “dwell” on the topic of the past, and over time she will begin to remember her ex less and less often. And there is not far to complete “recovery”. You, of course, want the best for your friend and, with the best intentions, are ready to go to great lengths for her comfort and support. However, there are things that you should not do so as not to increase your friend's suffering.
    Don't help her drown her grief with alcohol. Some may think that alcohol is the best solution for helping a friend, but this is not so. Firstly, you and your friend will harm your health, which in itself is bad, and, secondly, while intoxicated you can do a lot of stupid things, which you will probably regret later. Don’t “translate” the situation onto yourself If you think that as soon as you tell your friend about your own suffering in a similar situation, she will immediately stop crying, you are deeply mistaken.

    A friend broke up with her boyfriend: ways to help support her

    Few people manage to survive the breakup of a love relationship without suffering. And if your friend is not one of these rare exceptions, she is now extremely ill. Of course, if you want to help her in some way, you can do it, but it is important to provide support correctly, otherwise you risk only making the situation worse.

    The very first thing you must do is accept the depth of your friend's suffering. Even if it seems to you that her ex-boyfriend was not worthy of her and is generally a type, her friend thinks differently. And it’s not for you to decide how deeply your friend was hurt by the breakup.

    Remember that love suffering is always one of the most powerful and is experienced very hard. Therefore, especially in the first time after your friend breaks up with her boyfriend, do not try to convince her that she should not cry and will find someone better - she simply will not hear you.

    13 ways to console a girlfriend who broke up with her man

    Psychologists distinguish two conditional phases in the state of people who have been rejected by their loved ones - the phase of protest and the phase of submission. In the first phase, the abandoned person cannot believe what is happening; it still seems to him that his loved one is about to return and everything will be the same. During this phase, it is usually useless to appeal to the common sense of the abandoned person: time must pass before the person can accept what happened.

    Immediately after breaking up with her boyfriend, your friend is in the protest phase. That is why your seemingly very sound and sober arguments will now be completely useless. So during this period, you better get ready to be a “vest for tears” and meekly listen to everything that’s boiling up in your friend’s soul.

    At the same time, try to distract her in a variety of ways, keep her away from places where she usually walked with her ex-boyfriend or where she might now stumble upon him.

    How to calm down a girl who was dumped by her boyfriend

    Answer from Nataleks [guru] he will cry for a few days and stop, and then in a month he will understand that he wasn’t worth it, the main thing is not to let her call him and meet. Answer from Elena Lushenkova [guru] Find her a new prana, because they knock out a wedge with a wedge Reply from Svetlana[guru] just needs to support her, help her unwind, but giving advice “forget this asshole” is not worth it, be the extreme Answer from Olechka<[гуру]надо развеятьсятащи её в клуб, кино, везде, где есть люди и туса,чтоб забыла свои слезы Ответ от Vivian Love[гуру]всеми возможными способами отвлечь, если возможно поменять обстановку — куда-нибудь съездить Ответ от Любовь Смирнова[гуру]а чего рыдает то? ну бросил, и чёрт с ним — других что ли мало, а любовь она штука капризная, то есть а то пропала вовсе. Если парень козёл, так и нечего переживать, нужно утереть сопли и идти по жизни с высоко поднятой головой.

  • A common mistake is to start telling your jilted friend how pathetic [insert any derogatory comparison] her boyfriend was. This will have the opposite effect: she will begin to defend him, because she still has feelings for him, and you will find yourself on the extreme side.
  • It’s better to remind her of the reasons for breaking up. So, by not directly criticizing her man, you are showing her that this was not a relationship worth regretting.
  • A bad example: “Yes, he’s a boor, a slob, and didn’t miss a single skirt, and besides, he’s dumb as a plug!”
  • A good example: “Think about it - what have you lost? Unflattering comments about yourself, dirty dishes under the bed, cheating? You deserve a man who will appreciate you and with whom you will have something to talk about.”
  • Play music from your teenage years for her - for example, the one you rocked out to at the school disco. Or put on an old favorite movie.

How to calm down a girl who was dumped by her boyfriend

True friends help each other, support, console, and rejoice together. How to help a friend if her boyfriend left her? You can drag her out to the bar, of course, so that she can dilute her sadness with a glass of wine. Besides, there are a lot of men there. However, you should not drag your friend to the bar, because in a crowd she will feel lonely more than ever, and a glass of wine can turn into ten glasses with all the ensuing consequences.

Adapt to her mood You need to feel the mood of your friend and adapt to it. If, for example, she is angry and you are angry with her ex, tell her what a scoundrel he was and that she deserves a better man. However, if your friend is sad, it is highly undesirable to grieve with her.


It’s better to have several handkerchiefs ready, if you don’t want your friend to blow her nose right on your shoulder, hug her, stroke her head.

How to console a girl whose boyfriend left her?

Don’t force your friend’s mood, don’t tell her how to feel – angry, happy or sad. Listen. Surely your friend will want to be a little frank. Listen to her, don’t interrupt, because the conversation now is about her, but not about you.

Listen not just silently, but in every possible way make it clear that you are interested, that you are not soaring somewhere in the clouds, instead of listening to what your friend is telling you. Look at her, nod, say “Yes,” “Really?”, “I understand,” etc., where necessary. Try not to talk about yourself, even in passing. For example, instead of the phrase “He treated you cruelly, just like my ex,” say “It’s a pity that this happened to you,” and instead of “It happened to me too, I cried for three days in a row” - “Yes, it was hard for you, but I hope that you will feel better soon.”

Attention

Let's say that the girl and the young man broke up. The second thing a girl needs to realize is that life doesn’t end with this breakup, and there are a lot of equally interesting guys in this world. After talking with someone for some time or another, we only gain experience.

It is also necessary to understand the most important thing: EVERYTHING PASSES. There is nothing permanent in the world. One relationship ends, another begins, if the previous one does not work out. The girl, as I understand it, is young, and in her lifetime such relationships will be visible and invisible.

  • They knock each other out with each other, especially when you’re young. Don’t leave her alone, drag her into a fun group, introduce her to other guys. In youth, everything is much simpler - you quickly fall in love, but just as quickly you forget.

How to attract a girl after her boyfriend dumped her?

We will console the girl as follows: The first thing you need to understand is that the word “abandoned” is not applicable to a person. You can throw a cigarette butt on the sidewalk. Let's say that the girl and the young man broke up. The second thing a girl needs to realize is that life doesn’t end with this breakup, and there are a lot of equally interesting guys in this world.


After talking with someone for some time or another, we only gain experience. It is also necessary to understand the most important thing: EVERYTHING PASSES. There is nothing permanent in the world. One relationship ends, another begins, if the previous one does not work out. The girl, as I understand it, is young, and in her lifetime such relationships will be visible and invisible.

Support and support: how to help a friend if her boyfriend abandoned her

  • Whatever you want, with any entertainment and excitement that emotions provide. Just not at parties where alcohol flows like a river, because out of grief a girl can take up a glass, there are such things. And then there will be two possible outcomes: 1) drunken tears, snot about how bad she feels without him.

    2) with a scream I am free! she will rush off in search of adventure. Therefore, it is better to choose safe places for solace, such as a water park, climbing wall, trampolines, cinema, amusement parks or a beauty salon, where she can change her look. After all, they usually say that if a girl didn’t change her hairstyle or hair color after a breakup, then everything is not so bad.

  • We will console the girl as follows: The first thing you need to understand is that the word “abandoned” is not applicable to a person. You can throw a cigarette butt on the sidewalk.

13 ways to console a girlfriend who broke up with her man

It’s better not to talk about her ex at all, even in passing, so phrases like “He doesn’t deserve you” or “I don’t understand what you see in him” are strictly prohibited. Raise your self-esteem Try to raise your beloved friend's self-esteem. Tell her how talented, brave, smart, beautiful she is, what she deserves, how many wonderful things await her in the future.

Important

Protect from troubles While your friend is under stress, protect her from troubles, from actions that could damage her health or reputation, especially if she drank wine or something stronger. Suddenly she feels the urge to call her ex-boyfriend or his current girlfriend. In a state of passion, she can say a lot of unnecessary things.


Keep her busy Plan a trip together, just not in the next couple of days. Let your friend cry all her tears and calm down.

To find the right words and calm down a girl abandoned by her boyfriend, take note of characteristic wording. An upset girl may be your best friend or work colleague. It is possible that she is your favorite girl, and you are a young man who wants to take her place already an ex-boyfriend. In this case, the words of reassurance will be different from those of friends. Whatever one may say, the person is worried, and you must take part in the life of someone like you. * Marinka, I’m not reassuring you. And I'm not saying that this is nothing. I just know your state when your beloved guy leaves you. I cried too, but time wiped away all the tears. Everything will pass, just trust me.

* Nadya, when you love, it’s always hard, and it’s too difficult to calm down. You know, us women are abandoned by men, and we become stronger because of it. Now it seems to you that he is the one and only. I am sure that life has deceived you.

How to calm down a girl who was dumped by her boyfriend

And there is no one to blame here. * Len, your boyfriend has not yet realized who he lost. Having abandoned you, someone else will attack him. Everything comes back like a boomerang. I understand that it is difficult to calm a person down with words. Tomorrow you will feel better.
It's always hard at the very beginning. You just need to rethink a lot and get over this state. * Zoya, I understand you very well. I was also abandoned when a reliable shoulder was needed. Just try to pull yourself together and calmly put everything that happened between you on the scales.
Perhaps you didn’t lose, but rather gained something. Only this will be known when the time comes. * I understand, Dean, that you still love him. I don't want to take advantage of your separation. I just want to be close to you, not only because I care about you, but as a friend who provides the necessary help. * Alla, I’m not saying that Vadim is bad, and you’re not to blame for anything either.
Let her listen to or watch something that she associates with the time when she had not yet met the one she was crying about. This will help her return to her half-forgotten self and seem to erase the years of an unsuccessful romance or marriage.

  • Make her go out for a walk, because your mom was right: fresh air is good for you. After just five minutes of walking, people's mood improves and their self-esteem increases.
  • Go to a completely new place - it doesn’t matter where: a cafe, a picturesque square or a recently opened shopping center, where nothing will accidentally remind her of him.
    Let him feel that he can be happy and have fun without him.
  • It’s even better if you manage to take a short vacation and go to the sea. They say it is the best doctor for healing broken hearts.
  • Convince her to buy some clothes that make her look stunning.

    Psychology

  • Psychology

October 5, 2015 22:30 We've all been through this - and we didn't always know what was best to say or how to behave. It's no wonder you get confused when your friend is in tears and you can't fix anything. This cheat sheet, developed on the basis of psychological research, will tell you what a good friend should do.

  1. First of all, prepare a vest for streams of tears. It is tempting to sigh with relief if a friend is in no hurry to pour out her soul and pretends that she is fine - but you know that this is not the case. And the sooner she speaks out, the sooner she will feel better.
  2. Unoriginal, but very important point: chocolate. You know everything about it: endorphins and all that.

She now needs to improve her self-esteem.

  • And a little self-care for her beloved self wouldn’t hurt her now. Book a manicure, go to the spa, or do yoga together. At the same time, you compensate for the damage from eating chocolate.
  • But talk her out of any serious and disfiguring changes like shaving her head, getting a stupid tattoo in a visible place, or putting a ring in her nose. When she comes to her senses, she will breathe a sigh of relief.
  • Try to tear her away from social networks and advise her to block her ex’s page. Research has shown what was already obvious: People who check updates on the profiles of someone they've broken up with take longer to recover emotionally and move on.
  • Remind her that you love her. And tell her that she can handle it: this is just a moment that needs to be experienced and endured.

True friends help each other, support, console, and rejoice together. How to help a friend if her boyfriend left her? You can drag her out to the bar, of course, so that she can dilute her sadness with a glass of wine. Besides, there are a lot of men there. However, you should not drag your friend to the bar, because in a crowd she will feel lonely more than ever, and a glass of wine can turn into ten glasses with all the ensuing consequences.

Match her mood

You need feel your friend's mood and adapt to it. If, for example, she is angry and you are angry with her ex, tell her what a scoundrel he was and that she deserves a better man. However, if your friend is sad, it is highly undesirable to grieve with her. It’s better to have several handkerchiefs ready, if you don’t want your friend to blow her nose right on your shoulder, hug her, stroke her head. Don’t force your friend’s mood, don’t tell her how to feel – angry, happy or sad.

Listen

Surely your friend will want to be a little frank. Listen to her, don’t interrupt, because the conversation is about her now, but not about you. Listen not just silently, but in every possible way make it clear that you are interested, that you are not soaring somewhere in the clouds, instead of listening to what your friend is telling you. Look at her, nod, say “Yes,” “Really?”, “I understand,” etc., where necessary.

Try not to talk about yourself, even in passing. For example, instead of the phrase “He treated you cruelly, just like my ex,” say “It’s a pity that this happened to you,” and instead of “It happened to me too, I cried for three days in a row” - “Yes, it was hard for you, but I hope that you will feel better soon.” It’s better not to talk about her ex at all, even in passing, so phrases like “He doesn’t deserve you” or “I don’t understand what you see in him” are strictly prohibited.

Raise your self-esteem

Try raise your beloved friend's self-esteem. Tell her how talented, brave, smart, beautiful she is, what she deserves, how many wonderful things await her in the future.

Protect from troubles

While your friend is under stress, protect her from troubles, from actions that could damage her health or reputation, especially if she drank wine or something stronger. Suddenly she feels the urge to call her ex-boyfriend or his current girlfriend. In a state of passion, she can say a lot of unnecessary things.

Keep her busy

Plan a trip together, just not in the next couple of days. Let your friend cry all her tears and calm down. New sensations and impressions will help her escape from the harsh reality. And after the trip, your friend may immediately begin looking for new love or decide to live purely for herself for a while - this is her right.