Hello everyone! I’m very glad that such sites exist, and that I decided to ask someone for help. I’ll tell you a little about myself. I am 22 years old, I am very pretty, sweet and kind. I have never been deprived of male attention, and now it’s the same, I can write to anyone I want and can easily get a first date. I am not empty-handed, I have a very kind, open and sympathetic soul .I have an anonymous website on which 13 thousand questions have been generated in a year, people turn to me for advice and help in any area of ​​life and I help many with words, people are grateful to me, since my advice really gives people the right answers and motivation to actions. I am very wise for being 22, because a lot of bad things happened in life, after which I began to appreciate everything in life and see the world with some kind of pain in my heart and special sensuality. All men in communication with me admit that I’m a very smart girl, I see the world correctly. BUT... As soon as I start some kind of relationship, it ends abruptly. One after another. I go on dates often, after talking in a cafe I understand whether I want a further relationship or not. When I understand whatever I want, I completely switch to this person. I treat him with all my heart, I give gifts from the heart on holidays (in terms of the fact that I like to do something nice for people), the joy in my soul finally knows no bounds, that this is the person with whom I would I was glad to build strong relationships and start a family. But after a month or two, everyone starts to give up, freezes and disappears altogether. I analyzed, maybe this is all because you can’t show your soul to a person so quickly and treat him like family. But here’s the problem... I CAN’T do it any other way... I’m so sincere and good. And everyone hurts me without explaining leaving me... Will it really always be like this? Because 5 people have already done this to me... They all come back , they want communication, and they say that they were wrong, but this does not make me feel any better. I used to think that these were simply not my people, but when the other day history repeated itself... I began to think that it would always be like this, that my kindness would not be of any use to anyone needed. That I somehow behave incorrectly with men... But I can’t do it any other way; (Maybe you have an image of such a very good, calm and quiet girl, and you think that I’m boring for them))) But this is not so, I always the life of the party, I am very humorous, ambitious, charismatic, I have a lot of envious women... But this is all down to one place, when I plunge into a man with my head... how to get rid of this? It harms me very much, I will push everyone away... Advice to everyone I can give it my strength, I just can’t cope with myself... What do you think? I'll be happy to listen to everyone

In any marital relationship, it may happen that both spouses do not want intimacy from time to time. There could be a lot of reasons. It is important to know this, and not to attribute everything to fading feelings and betrayal.

However, if the situation is such that the question arises why the husband does not want a wife, here women’s logic and imagination paints various pictures. But it’s still worth trying to find out the reason for such indifference, so as not to let the situation get out of control and help in time.

Stress and overwork as the main reason for refusing intimate relationships

Residents of large cities are constantly under pressure. The fast pace of life, economic instability, and unpleasant situations at work do not have the best effect on well-being and health. Overwork and stress affect a man's libido, reducing it.

Libido is greatly affected by stress and living in a big city.

The man is depressed and upset, there is no time for lovemaking. Not everyone is able to switch gears and completely relax. And sometimes it happens, I just don’t have the strength for other physical activity.

Another option for the reason why a husband does not want a wife is This is a “work-mistress”. Men who are passionately involved in the work process often sublimate their sexual energy in another direction.

Their thoughts and desires are focused on what you love, especially if it concerns your own business. Reward and praise for a successfully completed business or project sometimes brings more pleasure and satisfaction to a man than sex.

Diseases affecting potency

Very often the answer to the question why a husband does not want his wife is the reason, which is a medical problem.

Possible diseases that cause low sex drive:

• heart diseases;
• hormonal disorders;
• impotence.

Depression

The brain is a strong erogenous zone. Sexual arousal begins in the head and then spreads to other organs. Depression can weaken desire and lead to erectile dysfunction.

During depression, a man may refuse sex.

Ironically, many drugs used to treat depression can also suppress sexual desire and make it difficult to get an erection.

Depression is a severe mental disorder. This is a serious disease caused by changes in the cerebral cortex. It appears in various forms and at different levels of intensity.

Men, women, rich and poor, teenagers and the elderly can all fall victim to this disease.

According to studies, from 35 to 47% of people with depression have problems with intimate life, 61% of people with severe depression have sexual problems, and up to 40% of people taking general antidepressants experience decreased sexual satisfaction.

Depression has both emotional (lack of motivation, inability to make decisions, low self-esteem, guilt, irritability, anxiety, thoughts of suicide) and physical manifestations (changes in the menstrual cycle in women, sleep disturbances, various types of pain).

You should support your loved one if he feels bad

Often, symptoms of depression are very difficult to recognize, so they are similar to many other physical and psychological diseases.

The situation is further aggravated by the fact that many people are afraid to admit they have a problem and seek help from a specialist. Of course, This disease can and should be treated. In this situation, the support of the spouse and an open, trusting relationship are very important.

Heart diseases

The occurrence of an erection and its maintenance, first of all, associated with the proper functioning of the cardiovascular system. With atherosclerosis, clogging of blood vessels occurs and this prevents blood from flowing to the male organ, thereby preventing the process of arousal.

Venous disorders contribute to the outflow of blood from the penis, which causes unstable erection.

Hypertension and therapeutic actions aimed at lowering blood pressure can also negatively affect potency.

Hormonal disorders

There is a concept of “male menopause” - andropause. Of course, men do not experience such strong and intense changes in the body as women. But still, people get older and may experience less sex drive.

Sometimes the cause of decreased libido is andropause.

The body produces low levels of testosterone, which is a physiological result of the aging process and this leads to loss of libido. Of course, always There are medical options to solve this situation.

The pharmaceutical industry has in its arsenal a huge variety of tablets and drugs that increase potency.

Impotence

Erectile dysfunction or impotence is the inability to achieve or maintain a penile erection sufficient for sexual satisfaction of both partners.

There are many reasons why a man refuses intimacy. One of them is impotence

Several decades ago it was believed that impotence is the lot of older men. Today, young people often face this disease.

Excitation is a rather complex process in which blood vessels, the cerebral cortex, the nervous and muscular systems are involved.

Failure in one of the organs can lead to problems with potency. So delicate the problem can have a detrimental effect on a man’s self-esteem. And the situation is only getting worse.

Basic physical The causes of erectile dysfunction are considered to be:

1. Diabetes.
2. High blood pressure, vascular problems.
3. Overweight.
4. Abuse of alcohol, tobacco, drugs, and some sedatives.
5. Side effects of certain medications, including medicinal herbs.
6. Injuries, operations.
7. Prostate cancer.
8. High cholesterol, etc.

Often, in young men, a symptom such as erectile dysfunction is episodic in nature and is associated with a psychological factor.

Among the psychological reasons are the following:

1. Depression.
2. Fatigue.
3. Stress.
4. Feelings of inferiority.
5. Personal sexual fears, relationship problems.

Internet addiction as a man's main occupation

Internet addiction is an obsessive desire to use the Internet for an unlimited amount of time, the inability to think about something else. This condition is similar to pathological gambling.

Social media addiction affects male libido

Some Internet users may develop emotional attachments to friends and the activities they create on their computer screens.

Internet users can enjoy the power of the Internet, which allow them to meet, socialize and exchange ideas through chat rooms, social networks or “virtual communities”. Other internet users spend endless hours blogging.

Internet addiction negatively affects personal, family, academic, financial and professional relationships. As a result of excessive use of the Internet, the perception of real life is disrupted.

People suffering from Internet addiction spend more time alone and communicate less with real people.

Those who suffer from Internet addiction m may try to hide the amount of time spent online, which leads to a breakdown in trust and understanding in a once stable relationship. An Internet-addicted man lives in a virtual world and can create fictitious images. He may lose interest in sex in the real world.

Another problem for intimate relationships in marriage can be a man’s addiction to watching pornography. There is an opinion that watching adult films strengthens relationships and adds passion. But most experts agree that Excessive porn viewing becomes harmful for relationships.

A man can get more satisfaction from watching a movie than from his beloved wife. And in this case, the answer to the question why the husband does not want his wife will be the reason that lies in the unjustified expectations that porn films create.

The reason for refusing intimacy is the wife

You should not assume that for a man, sex is just the satisfaction of his physiological needs. Sometimes men are more romantic and more emotional than women. And if the husband does not want his wife, it is worth thinking that maybe the reason is in the wife herself.

Some men love romance as much as women

Tenderness, a sense of spiritual closeness, trust, and support are often very necessary for a man. If this is not the case, then he may lose the desire for physical intimacy.

Important to remember, how much a husband needs praise, approval, gentle hugs and kind words.

Resentments, quarrels, showdowns are not always a way to “ignite passion,” but rather the opposite. That's why a man can withdraw into himself and shirk from fulfilling marital duties.

It happens that wife, after many years of marriage, stops taking care of herself, does not wear seductive lingerie, preferring comfort and simplicity, turns into a homely second “mom”, enveloping her husband with excessive care.

These actions can also negatively affect the intimate life of the spouses. A woman simply does not excite a man. It must be remembered that a wife is first and foremost a sexual partner, and then a mother and housewife.

My husband has a mistress

Distance, coldness, frequent quarrels, lack of intimacy for no apparent reason - these are possible signs that a man has another woman, or factors that can lead to this.

Men take lovers for many reasons. Some people want to diversify their sex life, to catch new sensations, others want to get what their wife does not give: understanding, approval, love, devotion. Still others are sure that it is necessary to have a mistress“by status”, etc.

Interesting fact, There are simply men who are prone to cheating, and men who are not capable of it.

If thoughts arise about why the husband does not want his wife, and the reason is another woman, then it will be quite difficult to revive the relationship in this case. Very often, a mistress is not the reason for a divorce for a man. And he can be satisfied with such relationships: his wife - at home, his mistress - on holidays.

Parental responsibilities and hidden jealousy towards a child as a reason for refusing sex

Some couples believe that the birth of a child will only strengthen the marriage and will make their relationship more tender and reverent. But in practice, quite the opposite often happens.

Some men are jealous of their child

The birth of a child brings changes to the lifestyle and financial capabilities of a young family. Sometimes this becomes a real test for new parents. Especially, the situation can get worse if the young mother is in postpartum depression.

There are much more responsibilities, much less time for rest. Personal needs become secondary. Conflicts, quarrels, disagreements arise. After childbirth, a woman's body may not look as attractive as before.

Most new parents experience a loss of sexual intimacy. Sometimes it can start during pregnancy because the couple felt uncomfortable during sex, or the expectant mother felt discomfort, or complications occurred.

Often during pregnancy you have to abstain from sexual intercourse

Abstinence during pregnancy can lead to a long period of abstinence after the baby is born. Sometimes during childbirth, a woman experiences ruptures or she undergoes an episiotomy. It takes a significant amount of time to recover.

New fathers may feel deprived of female attention, since the woman spends most of her time caring for the newborn. They often see a competitor in the baby's face. As a result a man can withdraw into himself and become depressed. This is often the reason why a husband does not want intimacy with his wife.

What to do if the husband does not want his wife

The first thing to do is to admit that there really is a problem. Communication is the key to resolving the situation. It is important to talk delicately and try to find out the real reason why the husband does not want his wife. Based on this, you need to act accordingly.

If you have problems with potency, you should visit a doctor.

If the problem lies in diseases, you should seek help from a specialist. It is important to support your husband and, if possible, be with him in these moments. In the future, strictly follow the doctor’s recommendations.

If the question arises why the husband does not want his wife, and the reason lies in constant stress and overwork, try to change your lifestyle. Outdoor walks, active sports, healthy eating will help you feel more energetic and healthy.

Sometimes you should just take a vacation and go on a trip, leaving your mobile phone and other equipment at home, and try to forget about business for at least a few days.

Sometimes you should just relax together.

The reason for refusing sex is your husband’s internet addiction? It is important that the man himself understands this and wants to change something. You can try to negotiate and set the time spent online.

A woman should try find common interests, not connected to Internet networks and distract the man. Thus, the time spent together will increase, which can be successfully spent on making love.

Young parents should take care of the baby together.

Young Parents should be more tolerant of each other. Child care responsibilities should be shared. Try to find time for each other. If possible, ask other relatives or close people to sit with the baby, and just be alone.

Things are much worse if the husband has a mistress. A man can be content with this scenario for years. And here the choice is up to the wife. Reconcile, try to save the relationship, or leave.

Ideas for restoring your sex life

Sexual relationships in marriage are very important. Without them, married life becomes “fresh” and “tasteless” and can simply collapse. Great responsibility lies with the woman for restoring intimate relationships.

A woman should remember that she is not only a housewife.

No matter how trivial it may sound, a man loves with his eyes. Therefore, a woman should not forget to take care of herself, dress up, and wear erotic lingerie from time to time. It is important that the husband feels and understands that his wife is doing this exclusively for him.

Can start foreplay to sex long before sex itself. A passionate kiss on the lips goodbye instead of the one on duty on the cheek, light stroking of intimate parts while no one is looking, SMS messages of a sexual nature throughout the day can ignite incredible passion in a man.

He won’t be able to think about anything else, so enchanting sex in the evening is guaranteed.

After a hard day at work you can give a man a light massage with elements of the erotic. Gentle touches, strokes and kisses will help you relax. A romantic dinner by candlelight, watching erotic films together will awaken passion.

If sex has become boring and monotonous, maybe It’s worth loosening up and experimenting? Don't be shy or afraid. You can talk and discuss possible options with your husband.

It should be understood that Problems may arise in the sexual relationship between spouses. But nothing is impossible for a loving couple. Patience, understanding, love and tenderness can overcome temporary difficulties and strengthen relationships.

This video will tell you why a husband loses interest in his wife:

This video will tell you what to do if your husband prefers the computer rather than intimacy with his wife:

If you are not a complete alarmist, then a week or two without sex will not bother you much.

You never know what happens to people: stress, poor health, troubles at work. But if the situation drags on, and you have to beg your husband for warmth and affection in your own bed for months, then it’s time to ring the bells. Not very loudly, of course: the piercing howl of a siren will scare away the last fluids in the soul and body of a man, even if they still remained.

So, we need to decide on the level of hopelessness of the problem. There are only two of them: the end of a relationship and a break, giving a respite and a chance for a new outbreak. In any of these cases, most of the useful tips in this article will turn out to be universal: both options require not to lose shape, self-esteem and respect from the partner, even if his desire is lost forever.

What's the first thing to do when a husband doesn't want a wife?

To start stop the hysteria. Panic attacks, scenes of jealousy, angry choking and other accompaniments of such situations are normal and standard occurrences. Even for those ladies whom others consider to have cold reptilian blood, and their husbands consider frigid statues, similar periods are painful and painful. There is always a place for wounded pride, if not love.

So do breathing exercises, count to ten, buy some rags, get drunk with a friend and cry into her shoulder, in the end. Just don’t torment your man with ugly scenes, losing your face in his eyes and the remnants of warm friendly, if not sexual, relationships.

A rare exception: if your husband is a pathological masochist or a very peculiar extreme person, then a little thrashing may stir up old desires. But here you need to be very careful: these games are not to everyone’s liking, and two or three random “reconciliations” will slightly correct the weather in the house, but the general climate will remain the same.

So, you are outwardly calm and ready to reason, plan and correct the situation. Your heart beats steady or almost steady. The fight for your husband begins!

What to do with yourself if your husband doesn’t want you as a woman?

Why doesn't a husband want a wife?

The main reasons for the cooling of sexual fervor

Parental worries

If you are a young mother, then the lack of intimacy is an easily explainable thing. A beloved but restless baby requires all your attention, and when the tired breadwinner comes home, then his father’s too. Physical and moral strength is running out, and the bed evokes associations only with sound sleep. If you don’t have a separate nursery, then the new father, who is unaccustomed to a small roommate, may become completely withdrawn. He already has in his arsenal a baby whining at the most inopportune moment, a wife dying of fatigue, who, moreover, does not have time to take care of herself, and, God forbid, a mother-in-law or mother behind a thin wall. In such a situation, the main thing is to survive, and there is no time for libido.

Such cases are by no means hopeless if your husband is not of that nasty breed who may stop loving you because you have gained weight after childbirth or the shape of, say, your breasts has changed. Unfortunately, there are quite a lot of such complete egoists. And, no matter how painful it may be for you to lose such a husband, his loss will be your step towards a normal life.

But let's be optimistic: although your husband doesn't want his wife, he loves her. Ask your mother, mother-in-law, neighbor, friend or nanny to take the baby to your place at least for the evening. Use this time wisely: take a fragrant bath, clean yourself up, light candles and order dinner from a restaurant if you haven’t had time to prepare anything edible. Seduce your husband like a movie femme fatale. He will probably be so stunned by surprise that your victory should be easy.

Husband doesn’t want his wife: stress, problems, overwork

It often happens that a husband would like a wife, but cannot: constant fatigue after work, work stress and various similar problems. In most cases, the culprit in this situation is work. In this case, the husband is physically and mentally exhausted. There is an overwhelming burden of worries on his shoulders, his bosses are sitting on his head, and his car’s engine is acting up. Moreover, my idiot son brought home three D’s in math - and who the hell is he so stupid!

Most likely, he will withdraw into himself and would prefer to spend any free minute alone - at the computer or with a book in his hands, rather than in bed with his wife. Because in this state, the thought of sex is associated with another frightening responsibility - this time a marital one.

Seduce this man again, since you already succeeded in this. Since he is still benevolent, respectful and affectionate with you, and after work he drags his mortal body home, perhaps all is not lost to you?

The husband has stopped loving or simply does not want his wife

This problem is much more complicated than the previous ones: the husband does not want his wife due to the loss of attraction to her as a woman.

If he is simply sad, bored, tired of your identical everyday life, your home “outfit” in striped socks and a faded robe, then positive changes can be achieved simply by changing the scenery. Then your favorite stretched robe from your great-grandmother’s time will go to the closet or the trash bin, the socks will take their rightful place in the chest of drawers, and they will be replaced by a glossy peignon or a knitted tight trouser suit.

And don't forget to get rid of that hellishly sloppy ponytail that's nesting on your head at home! There's nothing sexy about it, so you'll have to sacrifice convenience.

He sees what you look like when you go to work: well-groomed and attractive, in the best clothes. Is he, the husband, really unworthy of even a shadow of that beauty that passers-by and employees see?

This case of male reluctance smoothly flows into another: you are so different at home and in public that the dearest man in the world simply does not understand why and for whom there is such a carnival if you have to be alone with Baba Yaga. And you relaxed, decided that he loves you and that’s it, you don’t have to try.

This myth was inspired by novels and TV series: love and desire must be fed, provoked into outbursts, constantly stroked on the head and given nectar. Perhaps then it will take root and bloom wildly according to all the known patterns deduced by old man Freud.

Sexual apathy: the husband organically does not want his wife

He treats his wife extremely warmly, as a dear and close person, but does not consider him as a sexual object. Anything can happen: friendship, understanding, agreement, but not attraction. It may even happen that just the thought of sex with his wife-friend will cause hostility in a man. It is impossible to predict which path your relationship will take in such a situation. It all depends on whether you are ready, like Assol, to wait for scarlet sails on a sea where there are no ships? Are you patient enough to hope for success in a situation where your husband doesn't want you, and most likely won't want you anymore?

Husband doesn't want wife because of his rival

Sex without love is devastating. This is unanimously stated by many psychologists. If your husband no longer wants you, then perhaps he just fell in love. And it’s not even that he has enough sex on the side, it’s just that the object of his languid sighs and serenades at the moment is another woman. You remember how proud you were of his ardent glances, directed only at you.

Don't look for a meeting with your opponent, don't try to determine who is better. This will deprive you of your last strength, already undermined by long sexual hunger.

The solution to this situation also depends on your willingness to wait and forgive.

The husband's infatuation may pass. Romance - evaporate. The flow of life is to return to the old channel.

Many real cases confirm this: husbands returned to bed with their wives after the most dizzying affairs. They returned, cooling down after an affair, and stayed in that bed forever, having “feasted” their passion, experience, and variety of impressions “on the side.”

And the spouses who knew how to wait again received devoted and sexually strong macho men, ready for exploits on the sexual front.

The husband does not want his wife because he cannot want her...

Not every husband admits to an illness of this nature to himself, much less to you. These circumstances force men to withdraw into themselves much more than in the first cases. After all, here He, still young and strong, feels like a flawed, crippled, inferior man. He is driven into a corner and “rewarded” with severe depression by the inability to get aroused at all: neither from your erotic lingerie, nor from watching explicit videos, nor from taking magic pills.

Diseases that affect the sexual function of men are divided into two groups: general and special.

Special - diseases of the reproductive system that directly affect male sexual performance.

General - other ailments that dull intimate desires due to pain and discomfort.

Fortunately, 21st century medicine can solve many problems. And this case just falls into the category of options when you can apply pressure and present some kind of ultimatum of moderate severity. After all, we are talking not so much about sexual bliss as about the health or even the life of your soulmate.

What needs to be done in all scenarios without exception? In the worst case, you will simply improve your appearance and not lose self-esteem; in the best case, you will return everything to normal.

1. Think carefully about your course of action and possible risks. Forcing your husband or under torture to find out from him the reasons for his reluctance is a dead end. Throwing hysterics is useless; making threats is even worse.

2. Calmly and thoroughly have a heart-to-heart talk with your husband.

3. If in his explanations you see the outlines of any of the situations described, act according to our advice.

4. Regardless of the results of the “interrogation,” take care of yourself. Remember the last time you visited a hairdresser, massage therapist, or cosmetologist. Join a gym or just start jogging in the morning - maybe even with your spouse.

5. Try to penetrate his world without signs of mental violence: go fishing or paintball together, yell together at a football stadium or hippodrome. Probably, the husband is simply lonely and does not want to sleep with a strange woman who does not understand his tastes.

6. Add tenderness and romance to your life. Diversify your weekend and don’t overload your already difficult modern everyday life with responsibilities. Romantic evenings, surprises and relaxing holidays will help melt not only his heart, but also some of the functions of the male body you are looking for.

7. Tell your husband about your naughty fantasies. Sometimes curiosity can overcome even resentment, not to mention boredom and despondency. Role-playing games within the tastes of two loving spouses would be condemned only by the last prude.

8. Feel welcome. In the end, convince yourself of this - such impudence can become contagious!

The husband does not want a wife, but he will definitely want it

Being a desirable woman is a great science. At all times, women who traded desire at a high level were required to receive an education, master the art of dance, music, and special grace. Japanese geishas and French courtesans constantly took care of the skin of their faces and bodies, silky hair and soft hands, pursuing one single goal - to please men.

The ability to charm and seduce your man again and again, even imitating such seemingly unworthy persons, is truly a huge job. But the result of such work is worth the effort, isn’t it?

Ruslan had a turbulent past. Before his first daughter was born, he managed to try on several roles - a street hooligan, a local DJ, a Moscow artist and even a concert manager. Once in Moscow, Zhanna Friske helped him with housing.

Life constantly rearranged everything from place to place. After a while, Ruslan ended up in Minsk. He transported disc boxes from China; this business later also became unprofitable. One day, the performer of “Black Boomer” came to the city and offered to go with him to Ukraine, but Ruslan Seryoga refused. A successful meeting was with a lawyer who invited Ruslan to become the manager of the J: Morse group, the man agreed.

In 2008, Ruslan had his first child, his daughter was named Polina. At 10 months old, the baby was already eagerly telling her parents Chukovsky’s poems about “bears were riding a bicycle.” Ruslana's wife worked in logistics, and the family bought an apartment. The man admits that life has changed him significantly.

I began to neglect certain people. Every December you could feel like a celestial being. A person calls: “Hello, I have a corporate event, how much does J: Morse cost?” - “$5000.” - “Can I have a discount?” But you already have three orders for this date. And the fourth one you don’t even listen to, you hang up. He calls back: “Why are you hanging up?” - “I have nothing to talk to you about.”

A year before Sonya was born, Ruslan started having problems; he was being set up at work.

Usually newborns are a little scary. And Sonya was born as chiseled as a doll. With correct proportions, like adults. They thought: the wife is beautiful, which means the child must match. Her heart valve was not completely closed. But they thought that it would close when the girl grew up.

The girl had a congenital cleft palate, and this greatly worried her parents. Sonya began to get sick; during the year of her life she suffered two pneumonias. A geneticist with expertise in rare diseases happened to be there at the right time. It became known that Sonya has Cornelia de Lange syndrome.

There is very little information. She is already 5 years old, and no new information on the disease has been added. The entire biological process is slowed down. She is 5 years old, but she looks like a year and a half.

Sonya could not eat regular food; the disease affected her intestines.

For the first three years, we did not know that Sonya had a nutritional problem. The intestines did not take in nutrients. The daughter’s brain was partly deformed because it did not receive the necessary vitamins and microelements. Plus, medications have a terrible effect on her. They roll it back, to put it simply. It's like giving birth to a baby every two to three months.

The first year after Sonya was born was not the most difficult; Ruslan did not quit his job. But over time, savings became increasingly scarce. Based on various advice, parents purchased medications, alternative methods of treatment, and rare drugs. About 40 thousand dollars were spent on all these measures.

And if you take into account many projects that had to be abandoned, then it’s twice as much.

The doctor began a serious conversation.

- “Are you going to leave or stay?” - “I’m staying.” - “Basically, you have two choices: hand it over...” - “And the second?” - “The second... The child is weak, you can just leave the window open... The third inflammation - you understand, he won’t survive... Do you realize that your life will end if you leave the child? The benefit is a pittance. And you have a beautiful young wife. You will cross out her life too.”

Ruslan did not understand what to do.

You know, it was cynical. Essentially, they offered me to kill my child. It worked very subtly. In any other circumstances I would have struck. And then I took the information quite calmly. We actually had a plan for three or four children. But, as they say, if you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans. The doctor said that our next children will be healthy. But we didn’t even think about giving up Sonya,” the man said.

According to statistics, 90% of children with this syndrome do not live to see 3 years of age.

From time to time, Sonya was twisted from severe pain, as if she was leaving her body, her pupils narrowed, her eyes became cloudy. Then she returned to herself and arched over again, straight up screaming in pain. In most cases, couples separate. It’s good for us that we have a complete family. There is a rehabilitation center on Gaya. That's where I saw enough of everything. “When single mothers carry 14-year-old DTS boys, it’s tough,” the father shared.

In the fall of 2017, Ruslan went to shoot a video and received a call: the child had an allergic shock. The ambulance arrived on time and she was pumped out.

After that I decided that was it. Before that, I had already left Eurovision in Austria ahead of schedule. Now the maximum I go to is McDonald's, a hundred meters from my house. Touring life, “J: Morse”, Seryoga - it’s all over. At night Sonya sleeps. Nothing can happen to her. That's when I work remotely. I go to bed at one or two in the morning, wake up at six or seven in the morning.

A random Facebook post about enteral nutrition came to the parents' aid.

Enteral nutrition is a powder that you mix with water. A can of standard food costs 30 rubles. 3 cans for two days. 20-25 cans per month. 600-700 rubles per month. The benefit, in principle, covers these expenses. But the next generation of food costs many times more.

In Belarus there is food of the first group, and it is profitable to purchase the second in Poland. One bank in Minsk costs 4 thousand rubles.

In a Polish store, a jar costs $45-50. But the most amazing thing is that they are sold secondhand for $15-20 apiece. In Poland, if there are such problems, you don’t have to go through 800 commissions. A pediatrician's certificate allows you to buy a jar for € 1. People buy for themselves, and if there is something left over, they sell it at a good price to others in need.

The saddest chapter of a family's life is medical examinations.

Often this is humiliation. There are a lot of holes in the legislation in this regard. That's why I don't want to ask. It's better to earn money.

Giving up your ambitions is the hardest thing. It's just crazy how difficult it is. Fortunately the process was not abrupt. At some point you just stop hanging out and going somewhere. Not because you don't want to. You just can't.

At first, Ruslan tried to hide Sonya’s illness, the man just didn’t want people to feel sorry for him and pretend to understand.

I don't need all this pity. Moreover, she is often pompous. People want to play it to their advantage. Like, out of pity, they offer you a job, and then, like out of pity, they try to pay you five times less. Well, we did you a favor - and you’ll do the favor... It’s not normal when people want to whitewash their karma through pity for their grief. Thank God that now I have adequate and sane employers. You know, in the country there is no culture of communication with people who find themselves in our situation,” says Ruslan.

Ruslan’s wife Elena has lost many people who were once close to her, they don’t know how to communicate with her, they simply cut off all ties.

She showed real courage... Sonya is eating normally now. But brain disorders do happen. Recently the eldest brought the virus. I had to use antiviral medications. Another new baby. And it's Groundhog Day again. We teach Sonya everything practically from scratch. It's hard. Everything else is tolerable... This is my life. It's easier for me now. I know what to expect from people. I have no illusions, because sometimes I myself walked past other people’s problems.