The life together of a man and a woman follows a certain rhythm: every few years a new phase begins and each phase brings with it its own joys and problems.

1. Relationship phase: Marshmallow-chocolate - passion (fever) and tenderness (first 2 years of marriage)

When a man and a woman meet and fall in love, their bodies produce certain hormones that paint the world in bright colors. At this moment the voice seems incomparable, any stupidity seems amazing. The person appears to be in a state of drug intoxication. During this period, you should not make any decisions, since the effect of this drug will eventually end and everything will return to normal.

At this time, it seems to newlyweds that the honeymoon will never end. Both partners strive to fulfill any desire of the other and try to be together as often as possible. In the first place here, of course, is physical love: passion, sex. Psychologists call this period: “Spring of feelings.”

This phase ends with peace and satiety, which gradually moves into the next phase.

2. Relationship phase: disappointment and disgust (3-4 years of marriage)

The first euphoria passed, family everyday life began. Only now many spouses notice that their partner is not at all what they imagined him to be in the first months of falling in love. 87% of women even said that after the 2nd year of marriage they stopped loving their chosen one. And although this, of course, is an exaggeration, many marriages, alas, break up in the 4th year. By this time, the first child has already grown up, and the woman feels free again.

This phase is mandatory for any long-term relationship. In the phase of disappointment and disgust, quarrels begin, as if you were given a magnifying glass and you concentrate on the shortcomings that your partner has. The lightest and mostNotThe sure way out of this is divorce. What's going on hereNotcorrect? So this means that you again enter the marshmallow-chocolate phase, but with a different partner, and everything will happen again.

Many people only revolve in these 2 phases. Which indicates that they are not ready to enter into a long-term, serious family relationship.
But for some people it is a lifestyle.

In the Vedas, these 2 phases are considered: “a level below a civilized person,” since in a real relationship you are still soNot entered.

3. Relationship phase: reproduction and patience (5-6 years of marriage)

Those who do not yet have children are planning to expand their family. Love is no longer so hot, but more meaningful. But since a man cannot physically “participate” in his wife’s pregnancy, he often unconsciously distances himself from her. Consequences: 70 percent of expectant mothers feel sexually deprived.

Quarrels between partners continue, but they are of the same fatal nature as in the previous period, so both know that when the quarrel is over, the relationship will be restored again. If we put effort into developing patience, we are rewarded with the development of intelligence. This is the law of nature. So in this phase we are given intelligence.

4. Relationship phase: strength and duty, trust and respect (7-8 years of marriage)

Before this stage there was no love yet. This is the first stage of love: “I begin to think not that he (she) owes me, but that I owe him (her).” Focusing on our responsibilities develops us.

This is usually the most active time in family life. Married couples have overcome the first psychological difficulties, now they have very specific goals: the spouses buy an apartment together and furnish it. The professional position of a man is quite strong; many women also start working again after the birth of a child. Roles within the family are distributed, everyone knows “their place.”

5. Relationship phase: respite and friendship (from 9 to 11 years of marriage)

Friendship is a serious preparation for love.
The foundation of the partnership is quite strong, as is the financial situation of the family. The likelihood of divorce decreased as the couple crossed their 30th birthday. This phase is the "Summer of Marriage". Many spouses have already divided responsibility among themselves, usually following the classic principle: the man leads in the professional field, and the woman in the household. Disputes arise only on issues of raising children. An external sign of happy families: in the first 10 years after marriage, women gain an average of 8 kg in weight, men - 8.5 kg.

6. Relationship phase: results and love (from 12 to 14 years of marriage)

After their fortieth birthday, women (and a little later men) begin to take stock of the first results of their marriage. They recheck their life plan because they realize that there is not much time left to accomplish the most important thing.
Many partners in this situation believe that they are at a dead end, feel disappointed and are even ready to retreat.
Other partners realize: money is not the most important thing in life. There are things much more important than all the money in the world: a house, a spouse, children... - a full house and healthy household members in it. This is the “Early Autumn” of marriage.

7. Relationship phase: crisis (from 15 to 20 years of marriage)

Love has become a habit, partners begin to gradually move away from each other. Women do not want to put up with the weakening of their husband’s attention to themselves and tolerate his indifference. Many women gain weight by an average of 17 kg during this period. Men often develop “left” connections. They, however, are not going to give up the comforts of marriage and prefer a love triangle. Women, on the contrary, make serious attempts to break up. This period accounts for the majority of divorces, and in 70% of them the initiator is women.

8. Relationship phase: renewal (from 21 to 25 years of marriage)

The partners checked all possible options for future life and still stayed together. The “Autumn of Renewal” begins. Children have grown up and do not need help from their parents (except, perhaps, financially). Many men get a “second wind” at work. Women are also happy to engage in independent professional activities.

9. Relationship phase: “Late spring” (from 26 to 30 years of marriage)

When children leave their father's house, love suddenly receives a new impulse: it becomes more tender and less selfish. 48% of families consider the relationship to be very happy. 38% - harmonious and only 3% - burdensome.

10. Relationship phase: old age (after 31 years of marriage)

Harvest time. Spouses who have lived together all their lives can enjoy the fruits of their love; they are grateful to each other for the deep feelings and hours spent together. Although men's physical capabilities gradually weaken, partners have unlimited trust in each other. The marriage has reached the "Golden Autumn".

When you look at the bride and groom, your heart rejoices. The lovers cannot take their eyes off each other, they are happy and it seems to them that this will always continue. I can’t even wrap my head around what could be different. But, unfortunately, the truth of life sometimes goes against these expectations. After just a couple of years (and sometimes even less) of living together, for some couples, tender feelings give way to scandals, reproaches and mutual accusations. Why is this happening? How can these two, who recently sincerely loved each other, say such terrible words to their chosen one? Where did that wonderful feeling that seemed endless like the Universe go? Can a relationship even last a lifetime?

The relationship between a man and a woman is a journey that they take together. Whether it will be long or short, interesting or banal depends on the two of them. We can also say that relationships are a process, and like any process they have their own stages or stages. It is these stages of relationship development that I propose to talk about.

I came across different versions that distinguished from three to nine levels of relationships, but what interested me most was the system originating in Vedic texts, which correlates very well with modern family psychology.

Before moving on to considering these stages of relationship development, it is worth noting that partners do not always go through them synchronously: one, for example, may already be ready for the fifth stage, while the other is stuck at the third. The time it takes to complete this entire cycle can also vary greatly, but it usually takes at least 7 years to reach the final stages.

1. Falling in love

Yes Yes. This is precisely the period about which so many poems have been written, countless songs sung, and many films made. A person in love literally loses his head from the feelings that wash over him, it’s as if wings grow behind his back, and it seems that gravity is barely holding him in the material world. “Darling, I will give you this star.” But scientists look at what inspires creative people with skepticism. “It’s all about physiology,” they say. Harvard professor Helen Fisher examined lovers using a tomograph and came to the following conclusion.

The brain of a person in love intensely secretes certain hormones that are responsible for feelings of pleasure and euphoria. But negative emotions and rational thinking are blocked. Particularly high activity was observed in those areas of the brain that are responsible for desires, motivation, attraction and addiction. And here’s what’s interesting: these zones react with the same force to cocaine! The brain activity of a lover and the brain of a person who has taken this drug look very similar.

The state of such “chemical love” or ardent love lasts 12-18 months. If this period had continued longer, the body would have suffered from exhaustion, nervous and physical. It has been noted that many lovers actually noticeably lose weight.

From a psychological point of view, the following happens. A man and a woman, struck by Cupid's arrow, discover each other and experience a strong attraction. It is like eating an amazing and still unknown fruit. You want to feel the taste again, again and again. Therefore, this stage is also called the saturation stage.

2. Stage of satiety

But any taste, even the most beautiful, cannot always be new. Gradually we begin to get used to it and become fed up with it. Once your loved one starts living with you, this stage is just around the corner. For some, this may take a year, while for others, a few months are enough. A state of long-term love can persist when a certain distance in communication is maintained. Hence, long-term romantic relationships that develop at a distance through correspondence or rare meetings. When people begin to live together, they gradually begin to notice in their chosen one not only advantages, but also disadvantages, of which there are not so few.

3. Rejection

The state of rejection occurs when the “chemistry of love” no longer works. The rose-colored glasses evaporate, and the person begins to doubt his partner and wonder if he was too hasty in his choice. This is where quarrels and showdowns begin. In fact, there are only two options here: learn to accept your partner with all his shortcomings and move to a new stage of the relationship, or take the “warpath”, unsuccessfully trying to remake the other person for yourself. For many couples, this stage results in complete disappointment in the chosen one and a break in the relationship. At this stage, people often begin to think that they have chosen the wrong partner. It seems that with another person everything would have turned out differently. They break off old relationships, start new ones, but as soon as they reach the same stage they again feel disappointed and are again ready to set out on the search for an “ideal relationship.” If you fail to move to a new level, then such walking in circles can continue throughout your life.

4.Patience

In a traditional society, religious and cultural traditions contribute to the preservation of marriage, but in modern society they are greatly weakened. Understanding and working on oneself can help a modern person get through this difficult stage. Many intuitively understand this and it is during this period that they most often seek advice from a psychologist, read specialized literature, and attend seminars. The crisis of the third year of marriage often coincides with the third or fourth stage; this is the very moment when the love boat crashes into everyday life. You can observe the following picture: by the beginning of the fourth stage, many already have a child, the woman transfers almost all her attention to him. Relationships become much more casual. But since now there are new common goals, property, children, it is impossible to follow only emotions and desires. Therefore we have to endure. But the task of this period is not at all to endure the hardships of living together with clenched teeth. If you do this, then such patience may sooner or later burst, or the moment will come when the children grow up. Then the old problem will rear its head again and the couple will feel that the “glue” that kept them together all these years has disappeared, and they again find themselves faced with an unresolved situation: what should they do with each other next. The task of this period is completely different. Tolerance towards one's neighbor is the germ of wisdom and true love. This is a step that helps to overcome selfishness, accept the individuality of another person and understand that “if you want to change something, start with yourself.” If you know how to respect not only your own opinions and desires, but also the needs of your partner, and see in him an individuality, and not dough for sculpting your ideal, congratulations, you are nearing the end of this stage. During this period, there are also quarrels, but they are already manageable, and there is an understanding that the sun will appear again from behind the clouds after a while.

“Very few people know what love is. Ninety-nine percent of people, unfortunately, think that sexuality is love. But that's not true. Sexuality, passion is very animal, it undoubtedly has the opportunity to develop into love, but this is not real love, but only a possibility” Osho Zen Tarot. VI lasso

5. Service

In fact, only from this stage do we begin to approach the concept of “Love”. At the beginning of the development of a relationship, it may seem that lovers have already achieved it and can selflessly and joyfully do something for their partner. But whether this is really true can only be understood after some time, when the “chemistry of love” subsides and a person’s actions begin to be guided by his true beliefs, and not by endorphins. If at the previous stages the motives were quite egocentric, then here the other person is perceived not as a source of pleasure, but as an object of service. If we want someone to fulfill your desires, this may not be part of the other person's plans, but if we ourselves show a willingness to serve the other person, then he is unlikely to refuse. And over time, perhaps he will have a sincere desire to answer you in kind. In the east, the tradition is still alive, where most people understand that love will not appear out of the blue, it must be cultivated, it must be earned.

6. Respect

This is the result of the previous stage. People already know each other well; they have gone through many life trials together. Partners have learned to do what is pleasant and necessary for each other, without demanding anything in return. The couple accumulates a “bank of trust” and gratitude. Partners can easily exchange energy, thoughts and feelings.

7. Love

This is the long-awaited fruit that has ripened as a result of patience, understanding and caring for each other. The couple understands each other perfectly and experiences great pleasure when communicating. This is a real spiritual achievement and only very few people reach this level. As we mature, we can begin to experience love that goes beyond attraction and respects the unique individuality of another person. We begin to realize that our partner often acts as a mirror, reflecting unseen aspects of our true selves and helping us become more whole.

And it seems to me that the words of the Apostle Paul are dedicated to precisely this kind of love: “Love endures for a long time, is merciful, love does not envy, love does not exalt itself, is not proud, does not act rudely, does not seek its own, is not irritated, does not think evil, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; covers all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends".

If I had never in my life seen specific examples confirming the truth of these words, I would have decided that everything written above is just another beautiful theory. But several times in my life I had the opportunity to meet couples who, already at a very advanced age, were walking arm in arm along a park alley or riding on the subway. And there was something in their faces and eyes that immediately made them stand out from the crowd; they shone with peace and quiet happiness. They told each other something, smiled and seemed to notice no one around except each other.

True Love is not a random gift of fate, but a reward for efforts, the desire to overcome difficulties and great work on oneself.

In general, you should live your life like this:

Love is feelings, serving a loved one. If a feeling dies, then we are not responsible for it. Love is not the action of hormones, but the action of the mind, the subconscious. There are several types of stages of love.

1. Feeling hungry

A person understands that he cannot get enough of his soulmate; he wants to be with him every minute, every second. I want to see his hands, eyes, hear his voice. Waiting to meet again and again. This feeling is reminiscent of the feeling of “high” when you feel good and want more. You don't notice anything else except this person, you're just in a fog.

2. Feeling full

This feeling when a person is already fed up with everything, everything is already familiar, passed, there is nothing new. You can go out separately for a walk or visit friends. This stage is reminiscent of school, when you don’t do your homework, everything is boring, boring, and not interesting.

3. Disgust

This period begins when people know everything about each other: habits, smells, words that a person will say. Then everything about him begins to irritate him, how he breathes, how he communicates, how he eats, and displeasure begins towards his or her parents. Quarrels arise over nothing. It seems to you that everything, love has passed! But in fact, it has not yet begun, you just need to go through this period of disgust.

It's like in school, math or an additional subject that you can't do and it seems better to quit. At this stage, many couples make the mistake of leaving their partner. They believe that if they find a new person, they will not suffer the same fate. Everything will be exactly like this, falling in love (feeling of hunger), feeling full, and then disgust. To maintain this level, you need to work, work is Love.

4. Patience

Patience and a little effort. This stage mainly includes married people. When there are children, and a feeling of guilt is triggered, like children without a father, pride and selfishness are removed. Quarrels arise, but they don’t get divorced because of them, they simply wait for this moment to end and a new stage of the relationship begins. Difficulties happen in every family, it’s just that not everyone knows how to survive it, since not everyone knows how to work.

Using the example of a school, we can give an example. Lesson - we begin to walk, endure, study and do homework.

5. Performing duties

This is where love begins. Mutual understanding and support begin to reign, selfishness is eliminated, interest is shown in his interests, and they begin to give in to each other. That is, there was complete calm after the storm. A person understands what he owes and what his other half owes him.

6. Friendship

People are already comfortable together, they share secrets, have heart-to-heart conversations, and ask each other for advice. This is how they become close and dear people. People began to trust each other completely. At this stage, they are able to sense each other at a distance.

7. Long-awaited love

Statistics have proven that the love hormone can last exactly 18 months, and then the third stage occurs, after which people separate. But it has also been proven that if you work on your relationships and don’t give up, then in the 5th year of marriage, Love is born in the family.

Love does not hold evil, love does not tolerate untruth, but it can hope to endure everything.

At what stage are your relationships and feelings now?

Every person - even the most ardent materialist - deep down in his soul dreams of meeting true love that will last a lifetime and, perhaps, even longer. However, the psychology of love suggests that not everything is so simple: before you receive a deep, sincere mutual feeling, you need to go through 7 stages of love, each of which has its own character and its own significance in the formation of relationships. What are these seven stages of love and how to behave correctly so as not to find yourself in a vicious circle, being forced to always return to “first class”? This is exactly what we will talk about.

7 stages of love

The psychology of love has been actively studied by people throughout human existence. And modern psychologists have come to the same conclusion as described in ancient wise texts for a happy life - this feeling has its own stages of love. There are 7 stages of love. Absolutely all couples go through these seven stages of love - of course, if they do not break up before the time comes for each of these steps to real relationships (and it often takes a whole life to overcome them!). By learning all seven stages of love, you will be able to better understand the psychology of love.

A real deep sincere feeling develops over the years, because we all need a lot of trials and wisdom to fall in love. Most understand this, but not many are ready to work in order to discover this source of love and happiness within themselves. Let's look at the 7 stages of love so that you can do everything right in your own relationships.

Stage 1 of love: falling in love

The very first stage lasts a year and a half. People see their partner in the most attractive and unrealistic light. Beautiful appearance, good character, attention and kisses. Ideal! It was during the period of falling in love that many poems and novels were written. Films have been made and songs sung about this wonderful period.

“The chemistry of love” is the name given to the first period of romantic relationships by skeptic scientists who studied the human brain during falling in love. At first, hormones, endorphin and oxytocin dominate the head and blood of lovers. The centers of negative emotions and rational thinking are practically blocked by these powerful elements. Euphoria and high spirits accompany every meeting. Falling in love usually logically leads events to a wedding or the beginning of a life together.

Stage 2 of love: satiation

When people start living together or spending a lot of time next to each other, the intensity of passions subsides, and a loved one becomes something familiar, even commonplace. The lovers are fed up with each other. Routine comes into its own. The period of satiety passes almost unnoticed; it is most often short and rarely noticed by the spouses themselves. It is at the stage of love, called satiety, that shortcomings become noticeable. And not because the person hid them before, but because the consciousness of the lovers finally begins to work in its usual mode. This period can be delayed if children are born in a family during the period of love and satiety.

Stage 3 of love: disgust

The third stage of love is a real test. The rose-colored glasses are taken off, selfishness flourishes wildly. Falling in love is already behind us, saturation has occurred. During this period, special attention is paid to the partner’s shortcomings, of which, it turns out, there are more than enough. Virtues become invisible, and once sweet eccentricities now drive you crazy.

Unfortunately, without the third stage, the path to sincere, deep feeling is closed. For some, disgust lasts several weeks or months, while for others it lasts for years or alternates with other periods.

Quarrels, stormy showdowns, when everyone shows themselves from the most unfavorable side - and everyone sees the other only as a lump of negativity and incorrectness. It seems that the choice of partner was wrong. It is at this stage that many people conclude: we are too different to be together, we need to separate. Divorce during the period of rejection is fraught with walking in circles. Many men and women, having divorced, fall in love with each other again over time, become fed up and feel a new wave of disgust. Some fall into a kind of funnel of divorce, when each subsequent marriage is broken again and again by everyday life, shortcomings and selfishness.

Stage 4 of love: humility

There are no more storms. Quarrels happen less often. It becomes clear that it will not be possible to tailor a person to yourself. There comes an understanding that there is a person living with you who has both disadvantages and advantages. Usually during this period there is an active adaptation to each other. Special literature is used, communication with psychologists, long and often difficult conversations between spouses begin to resemble not a battlefield, but a negotiating table. These are teachings, preparation for love. Everyone begins to understand that they need to start with themselves: learn to forgive, understand, accept, endure. In many cultures and religions, humility, first of all, is the lot of women, who are naturally more flexible. It is she who, by her example, pushes a man to accept her too.

Stage 5 of love: selflessness and service

In all previous stages, good deeds implied a response. Both spouses, doing something good to their other half, consciously or unconsciously expected reciprocal behavior. During the period of service, you want to do pleasant things just like that, because the person is dear, because the soul is already ready for this. Service occurs consciously and voluntarily; it brings pleasure to both spouses. If one person is delayed at the previous stage, the other speeds up the process through his own behavior. Free service is the first shoots of true love.

Stage 6 of love: friendship

This is where respect and understanding begin to show themselves. The couple had already been through a lot by this time. Spouses know each other's characters and habits well, and know how to get out of difficult situations without conflicts. Both learned to do what was pleasant and necessary. They feel good and interesting together. The period of friendship can sometimes last for years and decades, because the spouses feel quite comfortable. Most often, friendship manifests itself brightly when the children have already grown up a little and the parents have enough time for each other. Childless couples come to friendship around the same time.

7th stage of love: Love

The long-awaited deep feeling comes deservedly and naturally. Understanding at a glance, spiritual unity – this is love. Few people reach this stage. After all, you must first learn to humbly and calmly accept a person as he is, take care of him free of charge, and accept his individuality.

The stage of love is higher than simple attraction or habit; it is in love that spouses open up and harmoniously complement each other, their shortcomings are neatly smoothed out, and their virtues are reflected in each other. This time the hormones are no longer boiling, it is a calm and joyful acceptance of the whole person as a whole.

Nowadays, in rare couples, you can observe how both spouses enjoy each other’s company. During the conversation, they are passionate, smiling, their faces radiate quiet, wise happiness and peace. This is considered the standard, the ideal of love.

But you should understand that such a real feeling is not given simply and does not arise out of nowhere - all happy couples grow their love for a long time and often go to it through hatred and cooling. In this case, you should remember the reward that awaits you at the finish line, and try on your part to do everything to preserve the fragile flower of love, warm it and feed it with your warmth.

Love does not appear immediately! A real and strong feeling appears only over the years. Seven stages of love that every couple in love will go through.

Love is not given immediately. Many understand this, but not many are ready to work in order to finally love sincerely and deeply. It has long been noted that real feeling appears over the years; it takes a lot of trials and wisdom to fall in love. But let's take things in order.

1. Falling in love. The very first stage lasts a year and a half. People see their partner in the most attractive and unrealistic light. Beautiful appearance, good character, attention and kisses. Ideal. It was during the period of falling in love that many poems and novels were written. Films have been made and songs sung about this wonderful period.

“The chemistry of love” is what skeptical scientists who studied the human brain during falling in love called the first period. Hormones, endorphin and oxytocin, at first dominate the brains and blood of lovers. The centers of negative emotions and rational thinking are considered to be blocked by these two powerful elements. Euphoria and high spirits accompany every meeting. Falling in love usually ends with a wedding or the beginning of a life together. (see 10 signs you're in love)

2. Saturation. When people start living together or spending a lot of time next to each other, the intensity of passions subsides, and a loved one becomes something familiar, even commonplace. The lovers are fed up with each other. Everyday everyday life comes into its own. The period of satiety passes almost unnoticed; it is most often short and rarely noticed by the spouses themselves. It is at the stage of satiety that shortcomings become noticeable. And not because the person hid them before, but because the brain finally begins to work in its usual mode. The period can drag on and change places with renewed love, if children are born in a family during the period of love-satiation.

3. Disgust. The third stage is a real test for future love. The rose-colored glasses are taken off, selfishness flourishes wildly. Falling in love is already behind us, saturation has occurred. During this period, special attention is paid to the partner’s shortcomings, of which, it turns out, there are more than enough. Virtues become invisible, and once sweet eccentricities now drive you crazy.

Unfortunately, without the third stage, the path to sincere, deep feeling is closed. For some, disgust lasts several weeks or months, while for others it lasts for years or alternates from time to time with other periods.

Quarrels, stormy showdowns, each shows himself from the most unfavorable side, and each sees the other only as a lump of negativity and wrongness. It seems that the person turned out to be the wrong one. It is at this stage that many people conclude: we are too different to be together, we need to separate. Divorce during the period of rejection is fraught with walking in circles. Many men and women, having divorced, fall in love again over time, become fed up and feel a new wave of disgust. Some fall into a kind of funnel of divorce, when each subsequent marriage is broken again and again by everyday life, shortcomings and selfishness.

4. Humility. There are no more storms. Quarrels happen less often. It becomes clear that it will not be possible to tailor a person to yourself. There comes an understanding that there is a person living with you who has both disadvantages and advantages. Usually during this period there is an active adaptation to each other. Special literature is used, communication with psychologists, long and often difficult conversations between spouses begin to resemble not a battlefield, but a negotiating table. These are teachings, preparation for love. Everyone begins to understand that they need to start with themselves: learn to forgive, understand, accept, endure. In many cultures and religions, humility, first of all, is the lot of women, who are naturally more flexible. It is she who, by her example, pushes a man to accept her too.

5. Service. In all previous stages, good deeds implied a response. Both spouses, doing something good to their other half, consciously or unconsciously expected reciprocal behavior. During the period of service, you want to do pleasant things just like that, because the person is dear, because the soul is already ready for this. Service occurs consciously and voluntarily; it brings pleasure to both spouses. If one person is delayed at the previous stage, the other speeds up the process through his own behavior. Free service is the first shoots of love.

6. Friendship. This is where respect and understanding begin to show themselves. The couple had already been through a lot by this time. Spouses know each other's characters and habits well, and know how to get out of difficult situations without conflicts. Both learned to do what was pleasant and necessary. They feel good and interesting together. The period of friendship can sometimes last for years and decades, because the spouses feel quite comfortable. Most often, friendship manifests itself brightly when the children have already grown up a little and the parents have enough time for each other. Childless couples come to friendship around the same time.

7. Love. The long-awaited deep feeling comes deservedly and naturally. Understanding at a glance, spiritual unity – this is love. Few people reach this stage. After all, you must first learn to humbly and calmly accept a person as he is, take care of him free of charge, and accept his individuality. The stage of love is higher than simple attraction or habit; it is in love that spouses open up and harmoniously complement each other, their shortcomings are neatly smoothed out, and their virtues are reflected in each other. This time the hormones are no longer boiling, there is a calm and joyful acceptance of the whole person, integrity.

Probably, some readers have had the opportunity to meet elderly spouses who enjoy each other’s company. During the conversation, they are passionate, smiling, their faces radiate quiet, wise happiness and peace. And it is worth remembering that these people did not live like this in perfect harmony from the first day of their meeting, they grew their love, came to it through hatred and cooling.

According to psychologists, a couple needs at least 7-10 years to reach friendship and respect, which over time will give way to sincere love. We wish our readers to feel just such a feeling. (see Long-term relationships)

5 Rituals for a Happy Marriage

1. Breakups

Before going their separate ways in the morning, happy spouses discuss plans for the coming day (5 days, 2 minutes = 10 minutes a week).

2. Meetings

Returning home after a day of work, loving spouses have a heart-to-heart conversation (5 days of 20 minutes = 1 hour 40 minutes).

3. Signs of love

These are touches, hugs and kisses, full of tenderness and forgiveness (7 days of 5 minutes = 35 minutes).

4. Date once a week

Together in a calm atmosphere, the spouses refresh their feelings. For example, they go to the cinema or to a cafe. Evening walks (2 hours once a week) are also suitable.

5. Mutual admiration and approval

At least once a day they express their admiration or approval to each other (7 days of 5 minutes = 35 minutes).

So, 5 rituals in just 5 hours a week = your happy marriage. (A. Molyaruk, psychologist).