Straightened my hair - in anticipation of rain. I styled my hair towards the wind. She laid it beautifully - for a hurricane. Chaos on the head - I met everyone I knew.

My wife left me because of my unhealthy addiction to metaphors. It was like a bolt from the blue. The ground disappeared from under my feet.

Everything a woman does at home is unnoticeable. It becomes noticeable when she doesn't do this...

In the end, each of us will understand our mistakes: you will understand that you were a fool, and I will understand that I was with a fool.

So many stupid things come to mind that it can no longer even be called smart.

I have never lied to you: I exaggerated, omitted, dissembled, evaded answering, pretended, fantasized, but never lie!

This unforgettable moment... - when they blatantly lie to you, but you know the truth.

Can't get through to someone for a long time? Stuff your mouth with food and try again - 100% works!

The weapon must be stored in a case. This is why women wear bras.

Some people have a rich inner world, but I have a rich inner war.

The soul asks for peace, the heart asks for love, the body asks for debauchery. I don’t give anything to anyone, everyone sits there angry.

Women usually know exactly what they want... right up until the moment they have a choice!

Neither the police, nor the tax service, nor the strong boys could take the money from him, but she, fragile and charming, could.

I don’t argue with my wife, it’s useless, even the navigator agrees with her.

I'm not jealous of my exes. Since childhood, my mother taught me to give away old toys to those less fortunate!

You need to love and praise yourself. Don’t entrust such a responsible task to strangers!

You live in my heart, in my head, in my dreams and thoughts... So, when are you going to pay the rent?

Only our men laugh at a woman driving while sitting on a tram

We slept together to be friends.

There are 5 types of husbands in Russia:
1. handsome and rich
2. but rich
3. but handsome
4. but he doesn’t drink
5. others

You need to do what you do best!
- Then I’ll lie down and watch TV series!

If a woman wants to refuse, she says no. If a woman starts explaining, she wants to be convinced. /Musset Alfred/

Everyone has cockroaches in their heads. And you are very lucky if your cockroaches become friends with the cockroaches of your loved one.

Nigramat what are you doing ahahah shut up

Tenderness is a better proof of love than the most passionate vows. /Marlene Dietrich/

A man is seen in relation to a woman...

Everything is in the hands of a man, and a man is in the hands of a woman / Alexander Furstenberg /

The weaker sex is stronger than the stronger sex due to the weakness of the stronger sex towards the weaker

The best statuses about women on Statuses-Tut.ru! What epithets do men give to the fair half of humanity? A beautiful creature, daughter of Eve, beauty queen, Vasilisa the Beautiful, bitch, witch, evil fury, vixen. Yes, we are so different: proud, sweet, strong, weak, kind, affectionate, principled, evil, vindictive, insidious and loving! On Statuses-Tut.ru you will find statuses about women with meaning. Place an interesting quote on your VKontakte page and let everyone know you are special! If you want to unravel the mysterious female soul and understand its logic, well, we wish you good luck. After all, hand on heart, sometimes we ourselves don’t know what guides us. We obey emotions, or as they like to say today, hormones. Visit our website and choose cool statuses about women. Perhaps by combining male and female logic, we can find answers.

Women's sayings for brunettes!

Woman, this world stands on your shoulders! You, like Penelope, are waiting for your Odysseus, you are beautiful like Aphrodite, and warlike like Athena. Three female hypostases are united in you - mother, wife, lover! And let men call you witches in their hearts, no, you are wonderful sorcerers who protect your family and this planet! For you, dear women, interesting women's statuses on Statuses-Tut.ru! For centuries, men have been arguing about who is more beautiful and smarter: blondes or brunettes. The question remains open today. And the owners of dark hair themselves believe that they outperform blondes not only in hair color, but also in mental acuity, strength of character and willpower! Brunettes are more organized, emotionally stable, focused on work, flexible, they are good housewives, excellent mothers. Just for you, charming brunettes, a selection of statuses about brunettes on Statuses-Tut.ru. You deserve to be queens!

Beautiful sayings for gorgeous blondes!

These primitive jokes about stupid blondes are nonsense and a provocation on the part of dark-haired harpies. Blondes are mysterious and gorgeous! Men are under their heels! They serenade them and give them diamonds! For you, fair-haired enchantresses, statuses for blondes. Let everyone know that you are confident in your feminine charms! History knows many examples when external beauty brought only pain to its owner. And outwardly not so beautiful ladies, but possessing strong energy, charm, sexuality, and intelligence, won the hearts of the most famous men of their time. And, as in a fairy tale, they turned into goddesses, whom even kings worshiped and brought gifts to their feet. On Statuses-Tut.ru, each of you will find beautiful statuses about women, wonderful quotes from great men about their women!

Happy woman statuses for everyone!

Beauty is beauty, but every woman wants to be happy! So that there is a worthy man nearby, so that the house is full, healthy children, a favorite and interesting job and many other “so that”. After all, women came to Earth as homemakers! We love our men and protect them from the storms of life. We keep the fire of family relationships alive. And in return we need love, loyalty and mutual understanding. A woman is happy when she is loved, this is the main thing! If you are happy, share a piece of your luck with your loved ones, and it will return to you a hundredfold. And our statuses of a happy woman are for you!

Small collection of cool phrases and sayings, which are ideal for the role of VKontakte and Odnoklassniki status, are presented to your attention on our women's website "Love Island". By putting a cool status on your page, you can not only amuse your friends and acquaintances, but you can also cheer yourself up.

Urgently... I'm looking for a job as a kebab taster... and part-time I can taste sausages, cheese, caviar, vodka, beer, etc... P.S: Family team work is possible)))

How to spend your salary? I'm not racking my brains! Half for rent, half for debts!

A minibus driver who accidentally drove onto a Formula 1 track won the race, even managing to pick up two passengers along the way.

This status is especially for those who are currently sitting at the computer, and have been cooking something on the gas stove for the second hour... It's ready...

When you set the soup to cook and go to the computer, be sure to take a spoon with you. She will remind you that the soup will soon be finished.

I was on a diet for four days. At night I felt thirsty, went to the refrigerator - then everything was in a fog. I woke up while washing down chocolate with borscht.

I'm not an alcoholic - alcoholics go to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. And I'm drunk, I go to parties)))

Nature has deprived women of physical strength, so women have perfectly mastered the art of psychological violence.

Every day those around me prove to me that life without a brain is real.

It happens that you wake up like a bird, with a winged spring on edge... And you want to live and work... But by breakfast it goes away...

My kitten knows more keyboard shortcuts than I do!

It's too early for me to have children. I'm not mentally ready to buy a kinder surprise and give it to someone.

I'm moving into a new apartment. I think: “I wonder if there’s good audibility here?” “Very,” answered the neighbor from behind the wall.

On weekdays you take your child to kindergarten, and on weekends he takes revenge on you for this...

Here you live, you live in a small apartment. And when you start washing the floors - penthouse, damn it!

When V. Tsoi died, everyone became rockers. M. Jackson died as dancers. Be healthy, Borya Moiseev!

Having a sense of humor makes it easier to cope with the lack of everything else.

The first rule of the diet is to go to bed before you want to eat.

I prepared dinner... I’m afraid to try it myself, I feel sorry for the cat... I’m waiting for my husband...

My street has been excavated by black archaeologists... It looks like they are looking for traces of a lost ancient sewer.

The father of eight daughters freaked out and named the ninth Andryukha))

Dreams come true... At a certain moment... Most often this moment is called “Don’t fucking need it anymore”

I'm sober, I can't even speak my braids!

The most terrible person is a person without status. You really don't know what the hell is going on in his head.

Sadistic teacher detained. He gave his students grades not only in the school magazine, but also under their photographs on Odnoklassniki.

If you look at the negatives in life through a raised middle finger, they become positives.

The iron is the female standard of a real man: it is hot, irons and drinks only water.

When my wife left me, I didn’t notice right away... The sex was the same, but dirty dishes started piling up.

The mother of 11 children said that she is only missing Aquarius to complete the collection!

I received an SMS from the operator: “Chat with friends three times more”... No, my liver will either fail or they will kick me out of the house))

Darling, are you jealous? - No, damn it! I'm jealous that guys write to you, but not to me!

The most arrogant creatures in the world are men! Where they came from is where they climb.

Family vacation. Dad wants to go to the Alps, and mom wants to go to the sea. Dad began to look for a compromise, but mom has already found a compromise - the whole family is going to the sea, but dad is allowed to take skis with him.

Only utility services responded to the request of the traffic police, if possible, not to drive onto the roads during snowfall.

Of course, I understand that the house must be cleaned and prepared! But I don't understand what it has to do with me.

Don't follow the stereotypes of other people's opinions. Become a woman like Chanel: not afraid of envious glances and giving everyone a sincerely happy smile.

What women value most in men is not only love for her, but also tenderness, the ability to listen, and make them laugh.

When my mother asked the question “Do you smoke?”, I accidentally, without thinking, answered “What exactly, mommy?”

All girls and women know very well: the shorter the skirt and the deeper the neckline, the less likely it is to not spend the night at home.

Best status:
Almost all women are angels at heart, but if you break your wings, you'll have to fly on a broom.

Yesterday I caused a fight between two guys! One wanted to get rid of me quickly, and the other yelled: “Why the hell do I need this woman?!”

What are the similarities between men and pies? The fact is that women love them either with cabbage or eggs.

There are no limits for women! At a certain time and in a given place, she can cry in front of the right man.

Guys, how much can you do?! Stop mocking the female psyche! Do not wear socks under flip-flops, flip-flops or sandals!

I am not wallpaper, you don’t need to paste me...

If I ever die because of a man, it will only be from laughter.

A smart woman knows herself that she is a fool.

The main thing is to love. And it doesn’t matter what color Lexus he has...;))

A woman is kind: she can forgive a man everything, even if he is not guilty of anything.

To find the zest in a woman, she is often taken apart to the bones!!!

If you want a girl to be an angel, organize heaven for her.

The collective female logic may be worse than female logic.

The average woman prefers to be beautiful rather than smart, because the average man sees better than he thinks

The woman knows perfectly well what she wants, she saw it in the store yesterday!!!

Women and cats always do as they please; Men and dogs can only relax and come to terms with this state of affairs.

Girls!, do you also have a funny creature in your closet called “NOTHING TO WEAR”??!!??

I don’t eat, I don’t sleep, I don’t want anything... I thought I was in love... it turned out I had a cold!

If a woman wants something sweet, she can always convince herself that this cake is dietary 😉

Where is the world going?! Probably at my feet...

Serious girls, like serious sites. Registration is required to obtain additional features.

There are no ugly women, there are specific tastes.

Mothers love their children more than fathers because they are more confident that these are their children... /Aristotle 384-322 BC.

Let men say whatever they like about women, but women make whatever they want out of men.

The girl never lies - she just doesn’t remember what she said a minute ago.

The most arrogant creatures on earth are men... always crawling back to where they came from...

Wise girls will always be able to distinguish a potential husband from a potential destroyer of their life...

There is no woman who could not convince herself that she is right.

She's too beautiful to have a conscience!!

A woman is the most beautiful creation of nature, with which a man was punished

A woman fusses in two cases: when she is looking around for a mirror and when she finds it.

By ending the harassment with an apology, you can offend any woman

Men are always right and women are never wrong.

Good girls always get princes... Who remember us at night.

God created woman later because he did not want to listen to advice when creating man.

The man is the King! Man God! But he is always at women's feet!

A girl should dress so that a man wants to undress her :-)

Alyonushka was the first woman to prove that all men are assholes if they just get drunk.

I really want something... either to get married... or to get some seeds...)))

An intelligent woman does not argue with a man... She simply confronts him with a fact!

They say: “What a woman wants, God wants,” but they don’t say that only God knows what she wants!!

If she tells you that she will think about it... then she has already decided everything 😉

I am made from a man's rib to protect his heart...

The man said it, the man did it. The woman said - the man did it. The woman did - well, what can I say...

It's good to be blonde - every day there are new discoveries.

Guys love beautiful and inaccessible... I'll go put on my makeup and lock myself in the safe! =).

What is the difference between male logic and female logic? Men's is more correct, women's is more interesting.

Give a girl a million red roses and she will say that she needs one, but white...

A good girl will never give a shit about an unanswered text message. It turns out I'm bad...

Tomorrow I have hysterics and shopping.

What can a woman make out of nothing? Hairstyle, salad and tragedy!!!

I am a Woman with whom it is difficult, But without whom it is a hundred times more difficult... Concealing good and evil within myself. In whose family there are cats, lions and snakes...

What does a lady behind the wheel do in a moment of danger? - She's hiding behind him!

The best husbands are civil servants: they never come home tired, and their newspaper is always read by this time.

Do you want to tame a woman? Carry her in your arms.

American women have diamonds on their ears, pearls on their necks, diamonds on their hands... And our women have noodles on their ears, children on their arms, husbands on their necks...

The best decoration for a girl is modesty and a transparent dress.

A woman knows that if she sobs loudly and throws a good tantrum, then two and two will equal five.

Always look good just because you might run into your ex by chance.

A man said - a man did - these are two different men :)

Sometimes cellulite makes you happy... When it’s on the butt of your ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend =)

I am from the generation of alcohol, eternal anticipation of summer and artificial laughter... From the generation of expensive cosmetics, smiley hair clips and calluses on fingers from SMS... From the generation-no-one-knows-the-real-me...

If a woman is not tormented for a long time, she begins to suffer herself!!!

Honey, is this your new girlfriend? I knew you had a sense of humor, but to that extent...

An unmarried woman is like a hunting lioness, a married woman is like a guard dog.

Intuition is an amazing instinct that tells a woman that she is right, regardless of whether she is right or wrong.

Don't marry a woman you can live with. Marry the one you can't live without...

Want to hear a bedtime story? Send an SMS with the text “I know everything!!!” to your boyfriend's number =)

Female logic: Said “NO” and nodded her head

I love men like this... who respond to a slap with a kiss.

Honey, give me money! For what??!! Well... for memory 😉

Whatever you give a woman, she will give you more. So if you shit on her once, be prepared to receive a ton of shit in return...

When women ask questions, they demand not an answer, but attention.

Treat people the way you want them to treat you. Give your husband some tights!

A good manicure can decorate not only a woman’s hands, but also a man’s face.

A feeling of innate idiocy suggests that fishnet stockings in combination with a minimalist dress will look cool in thirty-degree frost

Flirting is when a girl doesn’t know what she wants, but uses all means to achieve it...

A woman is right even when she is wrong.

And also... somewhere under a layer of unfulfilled hopes she is warm, shy, soft, and beautiful, and the most, most tender, if only she is allowed, allowed to live and dream again...

The extreme resemblance of a woman to a man should not be misleading...

Only my husband will have the best wife :)

Beautiful proud girl in a black dress and sunglasses...Ha! And at night he roars like everyone else...

Only a stupid woman can follow her husband. Smart people take care of themselves...

From mild anxiety to panic - usually 28 days... (girls will understand)

If a girl gives you the key to her heart, don’t be happy - she can always change the lock!

A real woman should cut down a tree, destroy a house and raise a daughter.

A man, in principle, is capable of any meanness in order to get a girl into bed. Only a woman who is determined to get married can surpass him.

If my mother was on VKontakte, she would learn a lot of new things about me...

Female logic: So you agree with me? Late. I've already changed my mind.

I’m not sick, and there’s no mental breakdown, I’m just 100% a woman!

Female logic: Tomorrow I have hysterics and shopping. 🙂

If you want to marry smart, handsome and rich, you will have to marry three times.

A woman driving is like a star in the sky: you see her, but she doesn’t see you.

It’s easy to understand women’s logic; just learn how to play billiards with cubes.

It happens... Girls, like weather forecasters, promise and promise everything =)

Women's logic: a kiss on the lips is, by the way, already a Relationship!

Every woman in her life must build eyes, grow breasts and put her husband on a leash...

In a family, both husband and wife have equal rights, especially the wife.

If a girl's heart is closed, knock on her kidneys.

Girls don’t think at first, and then they think, why didn’t they think when they should have thought?...

And how can a wife turn her tongue to accuse her husband of coming in on the horns?

Feminine logic: I tell you my final “maybe”!!!