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The father does not help the child financially. What if the husband does not help with the upbringing of the child? How to help a husband feel competent, confident in raising a child and invest more in fatherhood? Here are some specific recommendations

Climax

Relationships between fathers and children can be very complex. Oftentimes, dads are not as close to their children as moms are.

And the wives, in turn, are unhappy with how father takes part in the upbringing child.

What to do in such a situation? How to get a man to spend more time with his child?

Causes of male behavior

Why is the husband not interested in the child and does not help in the upbringing?

It is known that men and women completely different perception of birth own children.

Even if the father is the most caring and gets along well with the child, he still does not do it the way the mother does it.

The father usually does not seek to once again take his child in his arms, read to him, go somewhere together, and so on. He rarely take the initiative.

Unfortunately, there are very few women who are satisfied with the way the husband takes part in the upbringing of the child. Often it is the lack of action on the part of the pope that causes serious ones.

It is worth noting that it is by nature that men are less adapted to care. They have low levels of prolactin, which is called the “hormone of care.”

With the advent of the child, the level rises slightly, but it's still not enough in order to take care of the child the way a mother does.

As unfortunate as it may sound, but better not to hope that the husband will devote all his time to the child and jump around him with toys.

Men and women, in principle, relate to children differently and perceive them differently.

Statistics says that only 33% of men want to become a father consciously, 67% experience when they begin to understand that they will soon have a child.

Most men express their fatherly feelings at a more mature age. As they get older, they begin to regret that they spent little time with their children in childhood, that they did not take care of them in the way that was necessary.

What if the husband?

When a husband devotes little time to a child, wives begin to worry and try their best to change this. What to do in certain situations, like make a man spend more time with his child?

Not interested in the child

Mothers often complain that fathers show no interest in the newborn baby and they are afraid of what will happen next, if even now the baby does not interest him.

Well, for starters, it’s worth considering that there is also a share of mom’s fault in this.

After all, as you know, in the first time after the birth of a child, the mother devotes all her attention to him and won't let anyone near him at all., sometimes even his father, instructing him to do household chores.

Therefore, dad can get used to this arrangement of affairs and subsequently think that his help is needed only in economic affairs. In addition, it happens that fathers wake up, because now the wife devotes all her time to the child, and her husband goes by the wayside.

Psychologists advise establishing contact between father and child from the first minutes of a baby's life.

After all, some fathers want to wait until the child understands at least something and only then begin to establish contact with them. But this is a mistake. This must be done as early as possible.

As soon as the child is born, the father should be allowed to take care of him. It is desirable that they spend as much time as possible together. Let dad help in everything what is connected with the child: swaddle, bathe, lull, etc.

He needs to talk to him more, the baby needs to hear the voice of his father. They have contact must be made, which will subsequently affect their relationship as a whole.

Not involved with children

Unfortunately, fathers often do not show due interest in the life of a child, even if they are not divorced from his mother and live under one roof.

Sometimes, the husband does not take care of the child because he works hard or believes that his job is to provide good financial position families, and the wife will do the rest.

  1. In no case you can not speak to a man in an orderly tone that he should spend more time with the child.

    It is necessary to do it softer, as if to advise that the child needs paternal attention, you can use the relationship of some acquaintances or friends as an example.

  2. It is necessary to teach a father to be with children from the first minutes of a child's life. Husband needs to show trust him with a baby.
  3. Need to praise her husband for his actions and initiative, he must know that he is doing everything right.
  4. Can start some family traditions . For example, every Saturday to watch movies and cartoons for the whole family, and on Sunday to get out together to some institution.

Doesn't want to help raise

Sometimes the husband flatly refuses to help with matters that are related to children.

Wives are partly to blame. From the very birth of a child, most mothers do not trust their husband to take care of children.

They are afraid that they will do something wrong. A man, seeing all this, gets used to this situation, and when his wife needs help, he simply does not want to do it.

  1. About duties better negotiate before the baby is born. You can distribute housework and child care equally. Decide in advance who will do what. Subsequently, you do not need to demand more, except in emergency situations with a complete blockage.
  2. If the husband flatly refuses to help, for starters, you need talk to him.

    You should tell how hard it is to take care of children and household chores, describe in detail the daily routine.

  3. For persuasiveness, you can for one day swap roles with husband. Let him do all the work of his mother all day.
  4. Can be negotiated: if the husband does not want to help with the child at all, let him do all the household chores (cooking, cleaning, washing, etc.) or vice versa.

Cursing in front of a son or daughter

If a husband swears all the time in front of a child, you need to do something about it, because it is known that children copy the behavior of their parents.

Soon, the child will begin to use obscenities in kindergarten or school.

Weaning a husband to swear in front of a child can be difficult. Need to talk to him talk about the consequences of such behavior.

If it has come to such a point that the child is already repeating swear words after his father and copying his behavior, it is worth sending dad for a walk with the baby more often.

It is necessary to draw his attention to how the child behaves, to show that the husband behaves this way, and he just repeat after him.

Let him talk with the tutor or teacher of the child, find out how he behaves in Everyday life. You need to discuss with your husband that you can’t express yourself in front of children, because this has a bad effect on their behavior.

The child does not understand that he is saying bad words, and if you explain this to him, he can still continue to behave this way. It is easier to wean an adult from cursing than a child.

Screaming at the child

Men by nature more rude and demanding in matters of upbringing, I eat moms.

If shouting at a child is not backed up by cruelty, then it is normal for the father to slightly raise his voice.

Set the rules, which will say what you can scold a child for and what not. If dad yells at the child when he comes home from work tired and annoyed by something, the kid climbs to him with his questions.

At such moments better smooth corners. It is possible for this time to occupy the baby with something so that he does not disturb dad.

If the husband overdoes it with screams, it is worth talking to him. Ask how he wants to be remembered by his children. How he wants them to speak of him when they grow up. After all, children remember everything, and then they may treat their father differently.

It is necessary to respect the views of the husband on the upbringing of children, to praise him more. Do not complain to him about the children.

Ex-husband does not communicate with the child

Unfortunately after, most fathers forgets they have a child. Communication is reduced to a minimum, and even everything is completely replaced by alimony once a month.

But the child does not understand why dad suddenly stopped taking part in his life, he may even begin to blame himself for this. But what to do in such a situation?


Problem Prevention

How to prepare a husband in advance to help with a child? Some men, when they hear that they are about to become a father, get scared.

Because of fear, they cannot do anything and take the position in which they completely refuse to help. in matters related to the child. But what to do? How to prepare a husband for fatherhood?


You can always make a father communicate more with his children. It is important to find the right approach and convey everything correctly. After all, it is very important for children so that not only mom, but also dad was nearby.

Psychologist's advice on how to introduce a husband to communicate with a child:

Especially for readers of “Popular about Health”, I will consider what to do if the ex-husband does not want to help the child financially. There are situations when, during a divorce, the ex-spouse does not at all show any financial participation in the life of his former family, that is, he does not give money for the maintenance of his child.

Of course, such an attitude of a husband towards a child is unacceptable. Any father, if he loves his child, regardless of the fact that he does not live under the same roof with him, will provide all possible assistance to the baby. But, this does not always happen, there are such dads who completely forget about the children when they leave the family. And it's terrible, to be honest!

But in this situation, a woman should not despair, since she will have a law on her side that will oblige her ex-husband to pay child support through the court. Here the main thing is for a woman to apply in time with this request to the judicial authorities.

As you know, divorce statistics in our time are not encouraging, about every fourth couple gets divorced, as a result, either the wife or the husband leaves the family and the children remain with one of the parents. The family is now considered incomplete. Of course, there can be many reasons that led to a break in relations: this is a misunderstanding of each other; ordinary adultery can lead to divorce; did not agree on the characters and so on.

How difficult it is sometimes for a single mother in this situation when she is left alone with her problems. After all, not only the daily care of children now falls on her shoulders, but also the financial issue will now completely depend on her, she will have to somehow get out of this situation ...

The moment that a woman is left alone with a baby is already a difficult fact in itself, in addition, her state of mind is also undermined, and here also the problems of the material level join, which must be solved as soon as possible. It is good if the father of the children does not forget about his duties and is always financially ready to help his former family. But when, on the contrary, the former does not help financially, then this is a disaster.

It’s good when a mother can earn enough and she can solve all financial problems on her own without the help of her husband’s money. But, unfortunately, not all ladies can earn well, so many ask for help from relatives and friends, get into debt, take out a loan or simply borrow money from friends and so on.

What to do if your ex doesn't pay child support?

Women who believe in rituals can conduct one of them, which will help in a situation when the ex does not give money. To do this, they take a photo of the debtor, while the person in the photo should not smile. In addition, a green candle is required, it is lit and a photo is placed directly in front of it and a strand of hair is singed (for this, a lock of the child’s hair is cut in advance, whom the father does not help). Completely the hair should not be burned, only singed.

The mother holds the scorched strand in her hand, always looks at the photo of the debtor and reads the conspiracy twice: I ask Jesus Christ and the grieving Mother of God The servant of God (name of the man) take the wrong money And give the child into the arms. Key, Lock, Language. Amen, amen, amen. Then the hair is burned to the ground, and the candle must burn out completely.

Communication with the former spouse is usually kept to a minimum, except for questions about the child. At the same time, the father must communicate with him, meet - fulfill his paternal duty and, of course, help him financially. When the ex-husband is ready for something for the child, he comes to him, the wife should not prevent them from talking. She can stay in another room, of course, say hello and goodbye is necessary, but no more.

You should not ask about your personal life. Be gentle and detached at the same time. Yes, and the child should be taught so that he does not tell his father anything about his mother’s personal life. Dad comes to the baby for communication and to provide financial assistance.

Discuss with the former the material side, that is, what the child needs to buy, or simply ask for a certain amount and purchase the necessary things yourself. It is not at all necessary to force the husband to go and buy some things, you can do it yourself, the main thing is that he gives the necessary money.

Of course, it is optimal to formalize all money conversations legally during a divorce, that is, to file for alimony. If the mother did not foresee this initially, then she may not get the due amount from her faithful. Therefore, it is important to address the issue of financial assistance in a timely manner.

By law, in accordance with the Family Code adopted in the Russian Federation, parents are required to support minor children. The order and form of such content is independently determined by the parents. If they do not provide maintenance for the children, then the state collects alimony from them in judicial order.

In the absence of an agreement on the payment of alimony, they are collected by the court monthly for one child - in the amount of one quarter of the salary, for two - one third, for three or more - half of the salary.

In addition, spouses must financially support each other. In case of refusal of support and the absence of an agreement on the payment of alimony, the needy disabled spouse has the right to demand their provision in court; pregnant wife; spouse within three years from the date of the appearance of a common child.

If about money ex-wife if mutual understanding is not reached, then, accordingly, the ex-husband will help the children through the court, paying alimony. A woman should not forget about this, and if her husband does not care financially, it is worth suing him, after which a certain amount will be collected from him in court, which will be transferred to the child.

Tatyana, www.site

Video "What to do if the ex-husband does not pay child support?"

Does having children make a marriage stronger? Alas, in reality, relationships deteriorate much more often, overgrown with mutual claims and insults. Statistics show that half of all divorces occur in the first three years of a child's life. To help young parents, a family psychologist and mother of three children Yana Kataeva wrote a book “What kind of love, we have children!”, in which she analyzed the most common conflict situations after the birth of a child and how to solve them. We are publishing a chapter from the book on the topic of inactive participation of fathers in the lives of children.

A man has good reasons to spend time with a child, to be included in his life. He loves his child, loves his mother, wants to be a good father - often not like his father was. He wants to pass on his experience and his values ​​to the child, to raise a worthy person. And he wants a warm living relationship. Why, then, are so many dads rushing to sit their kids down to cartoons instead of meaningful cooperative games? Why on the streets you don’t often meet a dad flying a kite with a child, chasing football and even more so playing with a kid in the sandbox?

There are good reasons for this too. One of them is that it is more difficult for men than for women to endure children's tears, tantrums, and chaotic states. Dads feel even more helpless than moms when a child is naughty and hysterical.

Some men believe in the old fashioned way that their job is to bring money into the house. And change the light bulb. Babies are mother's business. It seems to me that this belief is largely protective. Protects a man from having to delve into what to do with children. From the feeling of incompetence, helplessness. You can not be confused: what is happening with the child, what does he need, what to play with him, but put this belief “my business is money in the house” as a shield.

Of course, the reason is that dads get tired at work and want to relax. And they are aware of their right to rest after a working day. In their picture of the world, after hard work, there should be a well-deserved rest. And they are not emotionally connected with the child as closely as mothers, and do not feel his needs as acutely as their own, in order to rush to satisfy them.

Let's be honest, sometimes mom herself involuntarily squeezes dad out of upbringing and communication. The key word is "involuntarily". Unconsciously. How does this happen?

"Himself!"

When a woman becomes a mother, as a rule, a newborn child in her arms is the first infant she holds at a conscious age. We dive headlong into motherhood in order to quickly become a competent, confident mother. And in order to master this role well ourselves, we can unwittingly remove the husband from parental duties.

This happens gradually and imperceptibly. The woman rushes to the call of the child, not giving her husband any chance to do something too. She doesn’t ask for anything, she wants to feel that she can handle it herself, which means she has become a skilled mother. Then, when time passes and she really needs a rest, she is offended by her husband for not helping her, but it is difficult to change the current alignment. It has already happened: a child is mom's business, and dad's business is some other.

"You're doing everything wrong!"

Modern mothers are very anxious, we are very afraid of something to harm the child. We are afraid to miss some opportunities and somehow underdevelop it. We are afraid to injure him, to be insufficiently responsive, to behave unpedagogically.

When a husband communicates with children, we are also afraid that he will do something wrong, injure the child, turn on the wrong cartoons or turn on too many of them, and miss precious time for development. And this anxiety pushes us to attack our husband: “You are doing everything wrong! You turned on stupid cartoons for him and instead of playing with him, you sat next to him on the couch! Of course, such behavior of a woman does not help her husband become a competent, confident father and want to invest more time and effort in his fatherhood.

There is another subtle aspect here. When a woman becomes a mother, her social status changes very much. On maternity leave, she feels some emptiness in social self-realization and can, again involuntarily, assert herself at the expense of her husband, because the usual ways of self-assertion in the profession, in work, in the recognition of the team are now inaccessible or less accessible. How does a woman assert herself at the expense of her husband? "You're doing it wrong, but I'm doing it!" "You can't, but I can!" Of course, this is devastating for both the relationship of the couple and for the fatherhood of a man.

A woman expects her husband to be an additional mother, does not understand the difference between her mother's upbringing and her father's

Modern moms and dads live in completely different contexts. The information field of a modern mother is filled to the brim with information about education. Dad's information field and dad's context are completely different. They are also filled to the brim, but with completely different information. Daddy's head is busy with something else. Dad's and mom's contexts are very different, but the tasks of dad and mom are also different. And it is not too reasonable to expect from a husband that he will be an additional mother to a child that will behave in the same way as a mother. No, he will behave differently. And this is useful and correct, because he is a dad. He has other tasks in education and a different style.

A woman divides the family into two camps: "Me and children" and "Husband"

We have already talked about this, but I want to emphasize it again. “We” (mom and children) and “he” (dad) are not a good alignment. Use “we” more often when referring to you and your husband. Or the whole family.

How to help a husband feel competent, confident in raising a child and invest more in fatherhood? Here are some specific recommendations.

Include your husband in childcare as early as possible

Ideally, include it in communication with the child even during pregnancy. And just make sure to ask your husband for help: shake, stay close if the child is small, and everything else if the child is older. And be sure to leave the child with her husband, and leave yourself. This is very helpful for a woman. This is a great prevention of emotional burnout. But not only. This is useful for both the husband and the child. The way a man communicates with a child, the way he plays with him is very important for a child too. Mom doesn't know how. Mom does things differently. The masculine, paternal style of communication and play for a child is very important and useful.

And dad is also good to stay with the child. First, to establish their own relationship with the child. Secondly, to understand how difficult it is for a mother when she spends all day with her children.

Cheer up your husband

Say that he is good at what he is good at. Praise him for specific things. For example, say, “Thank you so much for taking care of the kids and for the first time I was able to for a long time take a bath." Or: “Listen, how great you are at reading fairy tales to children! I didn’t even know you had such acting talent.” Praise for something specific and be sure to celebrate what dad is doing better than you. There’s probably something like this: “How do you make him laugh like that? With me, he never laughs for a long time! Or: “What a cool design you came up with. I would never have thought to build something like this!”

Point out what he does well. There must be something like that! And when you notice it, your husband wants to do it more often.

Weave the laces of affection

This is what in the psychology of attachment is called "woo". Woo husband to children and children to husband. Speak in different contexts and different situations about how they need each other, are loved, pleasant, how they like each other, how they are similar to each other.

For example, tell your husband: “Today my son looked at your picture and laughed, he recognized you and shouted: “Dad!” “Tell your child: “My dad and I talked yesterday about going karting with him when the holidays are over.” Tell your husband: “Today my daughter and I drew flowers for you, and she can’t wait to give you a drawing.”

Weave these laces of affection. I'm sure it's a very important women's job.

Create a cult of the pope

This can be expressed in the rituals of meeting and farewell. The husband comes - you call the children: "Daddy, daddy has come!" - and they run to hug. Dad feels: they were waiting for him, he is important here. At one time in our family there was such a farewell ritual: each child ran down the corridor and jumped into his father's arms. It was not easy for my husband physically, but it was clear how pleased he was.

Tell your kids to be quiet when dad is sleeping. To not interrupt when dad speaks. It sounds patriarchal. But when faced with hundreds of wives of detached husbands who are only interested in their gadgets, I see that by pushing the husband-dad somewhere behind the closet, women make a mistake. When dad is a respected, significant figure in the family, everyone benefits from this. In addition to children's respect for dad, including him in home life, you will receive the support of your husband as a bonus. Most likely, your husband will also tell the children later: “Hush! Mom went to rest."

Use the power of the environment

The environment matters a lot. Associate with families in which husbands enjoy spending time with children. Watch movies that have such characters.

Help your husband see the child as a subject, not an object

The subjective attitude is when “I see you. I see a small person with his unique needs, inner world, desires, thoughts and feelings.” The object relation is when “I am acting as a father and I expect you to act as a father.” good baby". Often such duties are presented in the form of "children should be seen, but not heard."

When we change the object relation to the subject one and see specific person it is much easier for us to build a truly human relationship with him. How to help a husband build a subjective relationship with a child, to see in him a unique personality?

First, think with your husband, tell him what features you noticed in each of the children, what is happening in their inner world, in your opinion, how they differ from your other children and children of your acquaintances.

Secondly, ask your husband what kind of child he was, how he differed from his peers, what was the content of his inner world at different points in his life. And also talk with your husband about his experience as a son, about what it was like for him to be the son of his father, what were the bright moments in his childhood associated with his father, for what specifically he is grateful to him, what was for him in these moments. And what he lacked. What he dreamed about, what he wanted to get from his father, but did not work out. What kind of relationship with his father did he dream of. And what does he remember about his father, what his father was like when her husband was a child.

This will help him to comprehend his paternal role and position, to see in the child not an object for education, but a real unique little person.

Help your husband feel more competent and confident

You are with the child 24/7, you feel it well and have gained a lot of experience. The experience of a husband in dealing with a child is usually many times less. Sometimes he needs delicate and respectful prompting.

Ask your husband to play with your child while you shop, and put toys that your child likes now and a favorite book nearby. The child was capricious with dad - tell your husband what could be the matter, what the child needs. Leaving the children with dad, write a memo that he could navigate: what to feed, what to wear. At the same time, giving room for maneuver and creativity.

Do not criticize the husband, his way of playing and spending time with the child

It's obvious, but I want to remind you. We know for ourselves: criticism discourages any desire to try. Praise inspires and makes you want to be praised again. Behavioral scientists call this negative and positive reinforcement. Their experiments involving both animals and humans clearly show that positive reinforcement is much more effective than negative reinforcement. Karen Pryor talks about this in detail in her talented and practical book Don't Grow at the Dog.

If you are one of the mothers who do a lot of educational games with children, remember that a good relationship with dad is much more important for a child than some time without educational activities. And have time to shut up in time when you want to instruct your husband how useful it is to play with a child and how uselessly he plays. In fact, for the development of “bear” games with dad, a child needs no less than pyramids and puzzles.

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Who is eligible for child support?

Good day! My name is Natalya. My husband has been paying child support for three years, but I received only 8 thousand. After the divorce, the ex-husband went to live in Omsk, then in the Tver region. I sent a writ of execution for the recovery of alimony to both cities. Whether my husband worked in Omsk, I don’t know, but now, in the Tver region, he definitely works. And still no money. Do I have a chance to get child support from him? - If the husband did not work in Omsk, then you have practically no chance. The only thing that “unemployed” fathers can pay for is property (real estate, accounts, shares, and so on). But practice shows that they register all property in the name of friends, relatives and “wash their hands”, not to mention the fact that the lack of work is also a fiction most often. Ex-husbands usually work, but hide their income by drawing up appropriate contracts with the employer. According to the law, it is impossible to collect alimony from such a father.

If the husband worked in Omsk, then his three-year "silence" can already be qualified as malicious evasion from paying alimony. And this already threatens with an article not only of the administrative, but also of the criminal code. But the chance to get alimony is again small - the court's verdict still does not guarantee real payments (this works in rare cases when the father is genuinely scared: what if they put him in jail). Besides, wouldn't it hurt the child to have a convicted father? What if the boy wants to work in the FSB in the future, and his profile will no longer be the best.

Now, in any case, you need to contact the prosecutor's office of the region where your husband lives and where the writ of execution is now located. The complaint should be written not about the fact that the husband does not pay, but about the fact that the bailiffs do not work well to collect the debt. It is the bailiffs, by the way, who must make sure whether your husband has property or not.

Or maybe you should deprive your father parental rights? If he does not want to take care of his child, then at least in the future no one will force my son to take care of a negligent father. - It's your right. If the father in the future tries to “knock out” money from his son, then the court will definitely take into account the fact that the father did not help the child financially, and will not force your son to support his father in old age. And it is possible to deprive a father of parental rights just on the basis that the father does not raise and does not support his child. The prosecutor's office of the Volgograd region, in every possible case, tries to use the relevant article of the administrative code (Article 5.35) and bring negligent popes to justice (they face a fine of 1 to 5 "minimum wages").

I receive child support from my husband. But less than she could: he hides his salary. And I have a very sickly child, he has three chronic diseases, he constantly needs money for examinations and treatment. How to get a father to help his child more? - If a child suffers from chronic diseases, he needs medicines, special nutrition, you have every reason to go to court. In your case, we should not even talk about alimony, but about additional payments - regardless of the amount of the father's real earnings. The most important thing in your situation is that your father works! And the court will oblige him to help own child in treatment. The amount is determined either in a fixed amount, or in another form convenient for both parents. Each situation is solved on an individual basis.

In addition, in your case, you need to fully understand the amount of alimony - is it underestimated or real. Write a statement to the district bailiff service with a request to carry out an appropriate check.

Ex-husband, he now lives in Novosibirsk, regularly transfers alimony to me. But only for 11 months (December falls every year). I requested the necessary certificates from the accounting department of the organization in which he works, they sent them to me. I thought maybe the alimony was unevenly “scattered” over the months. But no. Turns out he doesn't pay. What to do now? - You need to make photocopies of all received certificates; if there was any correspondence with the accounting department, copies of all appeals and answers must also be made. Send the collected materials to the prosecutor's office of the Novosibirsk region, attaching a statement to them: "I ask you to check such and such an organization for such and such a reason." Within a month, representatives of the prosecutor's office should find out whether the accounting department is holding money from your husband correctly, and why the amount of real payments does not match what you should receive by law. A report will be sent to you after verification.

I can say in advance that the reason for the reduced payments may be related to money transfers from one city to another. The fact is that the postage for sending alimony is calculated from the amount of the alimony itself - it turns out that at your expense. And the amount of money transfers for 12 months can be just the amount of alimony for one month.

With whom to ask for lawlessness in the son's section?

My son has been going to the taekwondo section for a year now. Until now, everything was fine, but recently - the news: it turns out that Lately the classes are not taught by a coach, but by a certain Masha - the oldest of the children attending the section. She seems to be replacing the coach for the duration of his business trip. How is this possible? This is not a drawing circle ... What if something happens to my son, even no one can help him. Who can you ask in this situation? - Unfortunately, there is no civil liability for such violations in Russia. And yet you can sue ... for violation of consumer rights. After all, special documents very clearly stipulate the rules for providing such services: the working hours of the section, the level of qualification of trainers, the rules for equipping the sectional room, and so on. From this point of view, your consumer rights were clearly violated (you paid for the provision of certain services, for a certain quality, but you were not provided with it). So feel free to sue the section management (the coach, by the way, has nothing to do with it). You can demand compensation for moral damage, and in case of physical damage, mutilation of your child - initiation of a criminal case.

Can a teacher be sued?

Hello, Lyubov Petrovna. We recently had a very unpleasant situation: my daughter behaved badly in class, did not listen to the teacher's remarks. As a result, she dragged her out of the classroom by the hair. The daughter ran home in tears. She is, of course, a fidget, maybe even spoiled, but not by the same methods to raise a child! I tried to talk to the teacher, but she thinks she was right. We want to sue her. Do we have reason? - Yes, I have. The reason is child abuse (Article 156 of the Criminal Code). You can also sue in case of public insult (namely, public, when there are witnesses!) Imprisonment is not provided here, but the teacher may be fined and restricted pedagogical activity up to three years. You need to apply to the court of the district where the school is located.

by the way

It is impossible to initiate a criminal case against a non-paying father without warning him about it. In addition, before starting a criminal case against the ex-husband, you need to find out exactly whether he works or not. To do this, it is necessary to conduct a procedural check (this is done by bailiffs).

number to the topic

In the Volgograd region, 30 thousand women are single mothers

On a note

Alimony is calculated at the rate of 25% per child. But in general, more than half of the salary cannot be recovered from the father. That is, if after a divorce you have three children left, you will not have to count on more than 50% of the ex-husband's earnings.

if the father of the child is not actually interested in the life of the child and does not help financially, is it worth allowing their communication, if in my opinion he cannot teach the child anything good in life

    Every person in our life teaches us something. :) Every person on our way is not without reason. :) Let them walk on weekends. It’s just that in the teenage period there can be such shnyaga: Mother gave all of herself to him, respectively, and forbade something, and dad is so white and fluffy, brings gifts, allows everything. And, accordingly, the child declares - dad is good, mom is bad. :(This is a pichalka in nature. ;) :) Good luck! ;) :)
    P.S. How about filing for alimony? True, there is a lot of red tape ... :(((

    It is worth discussing his participation in the life of the child as an ADULT, you should think about what he can give. And suggest that if he wants to communicate with the child, let it be for the sake of the child. And not because it is necessary, etc. Let him take some responsibility on himself, for example, to lead in a circle. One way or another, but the child needs a father, you can go to family counseling what would help you to spread resentment in different directions and important roles in a child's life.

    I think not) if he does not care about the child. why would they communicate at all?

    Not worth it. What kind of father is this? But communication should be banned legally.

    I don't think it's worth it. such a "responsible" dad is likely to disappear soon. Are you ready to come up with different unthinkable stories for your child when he asks where is dad?

    It is more important how the child relates to the father. You can divorce your husband or wife, but you cannot divorce your mom or dad. But if dad is a stranger for a child, then such communication is useless

    If a father has a desire to communicate with a child, this means that he is still interested in at least part of his life, it seems to me that this communication should not be limited. If you are afraid for the content part, try to keep this communication under control and not give your father too much will.

    better not worth it, this is my opinion. let better baby grows up without a father than looks at the indecent behavior of one of the parents. Moreover, the father is not the one who did it, but the one who raised it. and on your way to meet the real and loving man who will be an example for the child

    In any case, bans will not lead to anything good. I don't know how old your child is, but the time will come and he himself will draw conclusions - whether or not to communicate with his father.

    Worth it A child must have a father.

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