What are scary dreams?

Most often, nightmares are dreamed of by children of three to five years. Despite the fact that nightmares are a very unpleasant thing, in reality they are not at all dangerous. Moreover, such dreams help us cope with fears, make friends with our emotions, learn to control ourselves. Dreams never just happen. They are our helpers.

A kid who has a nightmare most often does not remember it in the morning. This means that the brain has completely “digested” the necessary information. But it also happens that the child woke up screaming at night and excitedly talks about the dream in the morning and does not forget about it. Then he needs the support and help of his parents to deal with his sleep. This can be in the form of a discussion, a story or a game. A small child must be taught to be calm about his own terrible fantasies.

Why do children have scary dreams?

Psychologists have long come to the conclusion that dreams help us "digest" the events that happened during the day (especially if it's something frightening). And during sleep, the baby, as it were, becomes a witness to the work of the very mechanisms that “sort out” what happened during the day.

What are terrible dreams?

1. "household" dreams. Events from real life are easily traced in them, albeit in a fabulous guise. For example, a father scolded his son for taking his tie. At night, the boy dreamed of the Serpent-Gorynych, who was chasing his brother Ivanushka, because he stepped on his tail. Such a dream helps the boy cope with resentment towards his father and feelings of guilt in front of him.

2. "deep" dreams. These dreams cannot be easily deciphered. They help children adapt to change, to growing up, and psychological problems(offense, unfair punishment). Sometimes "deep" dreams can indicate that the baby is getting sick. Our brain instantly begins to process with the help of dreams any changes that occur to the body.

Perinatal psychologists believe that sometimes nightmares heal a child from difficult experiences that he encountered during childbirth.

What should I do if my child is having nightmares?

1. Before talking about what happened during the day. If the baby is restless, try to find out what worries him, support him. It is good if the child falls asleep with a sense of security and safety. It is also important that if the baby is excitable, takes everything to heart, then, most likely, reading before going to bed will not do him any good. Look for something that will help your child sleep peacefully. Perhaps he should sing a song, light floating candles together, look at the constellations on the ceiling, take a soothing bath.

2. You can come up with a night “protector” - a plush toy or a flashlight. Then the baby will know that he has something that will protect him, and he will be less afraid.

3. If the baby screams in a dream, but does not wake up, do not wake up, but check if he can fall, get hurt. If you think it's safer this way, hold his hands. If he does not remember anything - do not raise this topic. In general, do not pay too much attention to dreams. Otherwise, for a child, it can become a way of manipulating adults.

4. If the child is awake, turn on the light to show him that everything in the room is the same as before. Listen carefully. If the baby asks to go to bed with the parents, sometimes you can allow it.

5. Don't be scared yourself! The unconscious of a child is a powerful well-oiled mechanism that can be trusted. If it offers a symbolic plot for sleep, then the baby is ready to solve this problem. Therefore, one must trust what one dreams, even if it is something frightening or incomprehensible. In any case, if a child wants to talk about his dream, keep the theme of sleep, develop it.

6. If in the morning the child talks about a dream, but does not remember how it ended, you can come up with an end.

7. It is necessary to express the feelings of the child very clearly, to say: “You were afraid.” You can compose a fairy tale together, in which there are the most terrible episodes from a dream. It is best to play this fairy tale for real, “bodily” playing all the roles, and not just tell. When the baby acts as the author of a fairy tale, he takes control of fear and learns to cope with it. At the end of the tale, it is important to emphasize that the baby ( main character), having gone through all the adventures, remained safe and sound. This is especially important to emphasize if the dream is not “everyday”, but “deep”.

8. If it seems to you that the dream is “everyday”, you can safely offer the baby to redo and change the dream, make it safer. In this case, it symbolizes his ability to overcome difficult real-life situations. But the same suggestion can be harmful if the dream is "deep".

Nightmares in children - how to forget?

It is believed that in order to forget a dream you didn’t like as quickly as possible (and also so that a bad dream does not come true), you need to look out, open the window and say - where the night is, there the dream is.

How to help a child who has nightmares and horror stories? Why does a child have bad dreams?

What are nightmares, most children learn after the age of three years. Most common cause nightmares - a feverish reaction of the body. If the child is healthy, the causes of nightmares can be in intense (for this age) intellectual activity, in a large psycho-emotional load; the brain is overtired, and the subconscious reacts in the form of a nightmare.

One more possible reason nightmares - trouble in the family; if the parents, preoccupied with the intricacies of their own relationships and not paying attention to the presence of the child, arrange noisy proceedings (simply speaking, scandals), if these proceedings take place often, the child may well begin to be tormented by nightmares.

It is also impossible to exclude the possibility of nightmares in a baby whom mom or dad is raising in excessive severity - they organize total control over him, “tighten the nuts” in every possible way, do not disdain bringing up with a belt, etc. Nightmares can visit a child who is allowed to watch television programs not by age; It's no secret that some masterfully crafted "horror" films, which often use the surprise effect, in which one monster is scarier than another, scare adults too.

A child who is tormented by nightmares sleeps restlessly, tosses about in bed; he wakes up in the middle of the night wet with sweat, he screams and cries in fear, he seeks support, protection and calls for mom or dad. Of course, at this time, one of the parents should be near the baby, should calm him down. As a rule, the child quickly calms down if, upon waking up, he finds his mother near him, if he feels her gentle touches, hears her gentle voice. Two or three sips of warm sweet tea (warm and sweet has a certain calming effect) can help. If the baby has frequent nightmares, the mother can keep a warm infusion of valerian root or a warm infusion of five-lobed motherwort herb ready; these drugs have a pronounced sedative effect, improve the quality of sleep. After giving the child a few sips of a sedative to drink, the mother should ask the baby to tell about what fears he had in a dream. According to psychologists, children, having spoken out their fears, usually cease to be afraid. Mom will help the child a lot if she laughs at his fears, without making fun of the baby himself; and it’s better if they laugh at the fears they dreamed of together. Until the reassured child falls asleep again, the mother should sit nearby; she can hold his hand, she can tell him a story (without negative characters), she can sing a lullaby.

How to help a child who has nightmares, bad dreams

A child who, for one reason or another, often has nightmares, needs special attention from mom and dad, from other adult family members. First of all, all factors that could cause nightmares should be excluded: peace and tranquility should reign in the family; handling the baby - only affectionate and precautionary; mom and dad should be very critical of the methods of education they resorted to - perhaps among these methods there are those that should be abandoned; it is important to pay attention to the television programs that the baby watches; if there are other children in the family, it is recommended to pay attention to the relationship of these children with the baby (do they scare the baby out of mischief?).

For a child suffering from nightmares, in addition, arrangements should be made healthy lifestyle life: strictly adhere to the correct daily routine, regularly take long walks in the fresh air, do not overload the child in terms of intellectual activity (work with the child on a schedule and strictly dosed), do not allow too active games before bedtime, organize proper nutrition for the baby; in connection with the latter, we must say that a child who has eaten his fill before going to bed, eaten heavy meat, fatty foods, is at great risk of having nightmares (from the point of view of physiological science, this is simply explained: the digestive system is forced to work all night, the signals coming from the organs digestive systems into the central nervous system, disturb the brain, and the disturbed subconscious mind responds with frightening visions); to reduce the likelihood of nightmares, do not feed the child before bedtime and the child's dinner should be light.

In the fight against nightmares, mother and baby will also be helped by a certain upbringing of the subconscious, which in this case we can call suggestion. Mom must constantly and confidently tell the child that he is already big and strong, that he is fearless and can accomplish many feats; mother should compare the baby with his favorite fairy-tale characters and say that he is very similar to these characters. When a child truly believes in this, there will be no trace of nightmares ...

Nightmares happen to everyone: both the elderly and three-year-olds. If a child had such a dream once, there is nothing to worry about. It is enough to calm him down, tell a fairy tale and gently hug him so that the terrible story disappears from his memory. It is much worse when a child has nightmares every night. He may scream, be afraid to fall asleep, feel depressed. In this case, you need to understand the causes and solve the problem, otherwise there may be serious consequences - a nervous tic, recurring pain or appetite disorders.

The nature of nightmares and the reaction of children

Psychologists say that the number of children who are tormented by nightmares is steadily increasing. This is due to high psycho-emotional stress, stress. Experiences can be caused by the most different phenomena- from fear during parental quarrels to emotions that a child experienced when watching cartoons. All this affects the quality of sleep and the nature of children's dreams.

The child sees a nightmare in REM sleep. Usually this is a dynamic plot of disturbing content. Often dreams of chases, punishments, pain. The child is seized with such horror that he wakes up, and then for some time he cannot separate the dream and reality. Stormy emotions can be expressed by screaming, sudden urination.

Dreams are so vivid that children are able to retell stories in detail, and remember them not only at the moment of awakening, but also the next day. Some susceptible babies 3-5 years old begin to confuse dream with reality, which leads to insomnia, poor health, daytime tantrums and even nervous breakdowns. They are depressed, afraid to fall asleep, to be alone, they experience severe anxiety.

Why does a child have nightmares: the main reasons

The first fears occur in a child at the age of about 3 years. It has to do with the development of the nervous system. Most often, nightmares torment babies 3-5 years old, especially boys. By the age of 6-7, children begin to become aware of death, which leads to a new wave of anxiety, which can also manifest itself in the form of nightmares. Parents need to be sensitive to the condition of their children, honestly but gently answer questions about life and death.

If nervous system the child develops normally, and parents make sure that he feels secure, after 8 years the number of nightmares decreases. By the age of 12, children's night terrors usually disappear, and if they arise, they are more like adult dreams.

Common causes of childhood nightmares:

Health problems. These can be organic brain lesions, mental disorders, among the symptoms of which there are hallucinations, increased anxiety. If the child has nightmares, it is worth taking tests for worm eggs, undergoing a general medical examination.

Mom's increased anxiety. If the mother is worried, the child reacts to her fears like a sensitive antenna. During sleep, these emotions spill out in the form of nightmares.

Parents' quarrels. Even if adults never quarrel in front of a child, he feels a state of tension, is instinctively afraid. It is important that parents give a sense of security, show that nothing threatens the family.

Tension in the family. Children feel tension between relatives, worry, and this affects the quality of sleep.

The coldness of the parents. If there is no emotional contact, trusting relationship with parents, the child cannot feel safe.

Prohibitions and overprotection of adults. Attempts to please parents, to "walk along the line" so as not to arouse their anger, often turn into nightmares for children.

Mistakes in education. The inconsistency of adults, their increased demands on the child, inconsistency - all this can cause the child's nervousness, terrible dreams.

The psychological state of children directly depends on adults. If parents surround with care, give a sense of security, give the child a lot of attention, it will be much easier to deal with nightmares. Adults must understand that this period will end, show patience and understanding. Right now the child is experiencing fear, needs help and support.

If you had a nightmare, you need to calm the child, help get rid of fear and make it clear that you are ready to help in any situation. Use these methods:

Discuss the dream. Ask the child in detail what he dreamed about and what emotions he experienced. Ask why he thinks the dream was the way it was. The more attention you pay to the conversation, the less likely it is that the nightmare will happen again.

Consider bedtime rituals. Let it be a warm bath, then a fairy tale in which terrible images and plots turn into ordinary and non-terrible ones. Spend as much time as possible with your child before going to bed, leave a night light on. The kid needs to feel safe.

Draw nightmares. Let the child draw what scares him. Change the pictures until they are harmless or funny.

Add active games to your daily routine. The child should be more in the fresh air, run, swim, play. Stay close to him, try to strengthen the contact. Your task is to release the energy of the baby and create a calm, trusting atmosphere.

Watch the psychological climate in the family. If a child has nightmares, it's time to reconsider relations with relatives, stop scandals and cold wars.

Don't overfeed your baby at night. The cause of nightmares can be commonplace - overeating. Make sure dinner is neither too heavy nor too late.

If these methods don't work, or if there is any reason to believe that your baby's health is not in order, make an appointment with a pediatrician, neurologist, or psychologist. What can not be done is to ignore fears. Nightmares can take hold, transform and poison the future life, undermine the child's psyche.

Toothy Jabberwock, Barmaley and the Gray Wolf grab you and drag you somewhere. Scary, even if it's just a dream! How to defeat the monsters and calm the baby?

Such horrors dream of all children without exception. This is completely normal: strong emotions experienced during the day, simple overwork, going to the doctor, or any other significant event for the child can cause a nightmare.

It is worth thinking seriously only if such dreams are repeated very often (every day, several times a week). But first things first.

How to help?

If a child had a terrible dream, most likely he will wake up and tell you about it right away - he will cry, scream, call or come himself. How to behave in such a situation?

Be there

Hug the baby tightly, reassure him: “I'm with you! Don't be afraid, it's all over!" Comfort the child until he relaxes and calms down. Do not try to quickly put him back, let him recover. If he is not fully awake, and continues to whimper and worry while half asleep, wake him up so that he “comes out” of sleep and understands that he is next to you, in complete safety.

Listen and talk

Dispel fears

When a child talks about his dream, most likely he will share what he is afraid of in real life. For example, situations when he got lost (he dreams that you left and he cannot find you) or some scary fairy-tale characters (Baba Yaga or someone even more creepy).

Speak these situations, tell and explain what can actually happen and what can’t. Try to give your child a tool that will help him cope with frightening situations. For example, teach him what to do if he gets lost, learn your phone number together, agree where to meet at the mall, etc.

If the baby is afraid of fictional characters, you can come up with magical tricks: for example, if you go to bed with a teddy bear, then no Babayka can do anything.

If, despite all efforts, nightmares happen quite often, seek help from specialists - child psychologist, a neurologist. Perhaps there is a reason for bad dreams that you do not know about. Experts will find it and help to cope with it.

Hello dear parents! When a child has terrible dreams, what to do and how to be, how to find out the reason, how to learn not to worry yourself and help your baby? Today I want to talk about the nature of scary dreams, why children dream of horrors and where they come from, and what to do about it all.

What it is

Every person has dreams. Someone remembers them perfectly in the morning and can retell them in great detail. Someone wakes up with a vague feeling, while others do not remember anything at all. Doctors say that children can dream at the age of one.

I’ll say right away, don’t worry too much if your child starts having nightmares. There is nothing wrong. Believe me, the subconscious will never do anything wrong. Scary stories can be a preparation for adult real life. A child at 3 years old is going through a crisis, it is at this time, most often, that nightmares begin to occur.

Then the child goes to kindergarten and at the age of 4 experiences establishing contact with peers, with new adults, his daily routine changes, new obligations appear.

In addition, dreams can be a reflection of the past day. For example, in the afternoon, the grandmother strongly scolded him for breaking her favorite vase. And at night he dreams of the terrible Baby Yaga, who is chasing him through a dark forest.

Nightmares teach a child to cope with difficulties. They prepare him for the harsh reality, teach him not to be afraid, to go forward, to find a way out of difficult situation. Remember, nightmares always have a reason. Let's look into them.

Causes

The first, as I said above, is the emotional experience of the day. Therefore, it is very important to monitor what happens during the day in a child. He had a fight with his mother, witnessed a scandal between mom and dad, scolded in the kindergarten, got into a fight with a boy in the yard. All these experiences may well be the cause of night terrors.

Another reason may be the child's illness. An approaching cold, for example. Why? The body is fighting, the brain is loaded, the immune system is fully working. From such serious physical exertion, horror stories appear.

Why do all doctors say that it is necessary to protect the child from the TV, computer games and gadgets? Because they can also cause nightmares. A 5-year-old child who spends all his free time at the TV or computer screen sleeps much worse than the one who walks more, plays games. board games and communicate with other people.

Another reason for nightmares is death. For example, at the age of 6, a child encountered a dead animal in the park for the first time. Or a relative has died. In the article "" you will find useful and practical tips on this topic.

Remember that any emotional or physical stress can cause nightmares. Moving to another city, changing kindergarten or school, scandals and tantrums at home, a quarrel with best friend etc.

If you pay close attention to what is happening in your child's life, then you are more likely to determine what is causing the nightmares.

How to fight

The main thing is not to show your child that you are scared, nervous or worried. He needs to see that you are calm. Remember, kids are very easy to grasp emotional condition parents. Therefore, if he sees your excitement, he will understand that because of his nightmares you need to worry. Be as calm and collected as possible.

Turn a nightmare into a fairy tale. Write it down by roles, draw all the characters, you can even play it in actions. Let him see that there is nothing terrible in this, that there will always be a solution and that good will triumph over evil.

If your child has nightmares every night, then the surest advice would be to keep a diary. In it you will record all the events that happen to the baby. Only then can you find the reason for the appearance of horror stories at night.

Be sure to come up with sleep rituals. For example, a warm bath before bed, or a joint reading of a fairy tale (preferably kind and minimally emotional), limit TV viewing before bedtime, no active games. Day walks are very helpful. Fresh air extremely useful for good night. In the morning, do exercises with the children.

You can draw a nightmare with your child and then tear it apart. So the child will see that there is nothing more to be afraid of, everything has passed and you can forget about it. If the child talks about his own nightmare, be sure to keep the conversation going.

If you are afraid before going to bed because of the monster in the closet, then arm yourself with a broom, for example, and drive all the monsters out of the room together with the baby. Show him that no one is anywhere and he can be safe. After all, the most important thing for children is a sense of security.

Did you have nightmares as a child? Do you know the reason why they appeared? How did you deal with them? How often does your child have nightmares?

Be calm and surround your children with care!