Today I accidentally came across on the Internet the words of one famous neo-Hindu guru and mystic Osho about what love means for a woman and a man. After reading his reasoning, it dawned on me. And I wanted to make his words the basis for my article. Perhaps someone will read and also understand for themselves those things that they did not understand before. Indeed, for each person the meaning and understanding of the word "love" is individual. Everyone understands this bright and beautiful feeling in their own way. And the most interesting thing is that for a man and a woman, the concept of love is completely different. I emphasize ABSOLUTELY DIFFERENT. Surprisingly, this is true.

Well, imagine that love is the sea, the right bank is the feminine awareness of love, and the left bank is the masculine. In general, it turned out that we conventionally divided love into two camps. Let's consider this in detail. So what does love mean for a woman? For a woman, love is her whole life, but what's the point of trifling for her, love is the meaning of life. And for a man, love is a rest, or rather a place of his rest. I'll explain now. Well, look, a man-writer writes poetry, works, books; a male musician makes beautiful music; a male artist paints gorgeous, original and unique paintings - in a word, a man in his field creates bestsellers - all this has its own material and spiritual value for him, but all these creations created by him are not associated with love. Well, let him paint his picture for a day, two, maybe even a week, months - but over time his strength recedes and he gets tired of painting this picture. He needs rest. And what does a man do? Where does he get this rest? A woman ... in her warm embrace ... in her radiated energy of affection and tenderness. A man wants to drown in love, wants to temporarily forget himself from all his perfect deeds in a day, wants to dissolve in the source of love that a woman gives him. A man loves when he gets his desired rest from this. And when he gets this rest, then he goes to paint his picture again. For him, love is a place of rest, where he can come from wild fatigue and just relax. From this it proceeds that love for a man is a necessary basis and foundation of his activity; it is needed in order to do other things: paint pictures, write music, etc. And for a woman, the opposite is true. For her, love is her whole life; for her, love is like oxygen, she breathes it. A woman will do other things just because she truly loves. If a woman does not love, if love does not live in her heart, then she will not do anything at all; she then ceases to do anything at all.

Therefore, all men and women want to wish so much to live with love in their hearts. Well, let each of us have our own concept of love, but for all of us, women and men, life without love is not life, it's just existence ... no more ...

Olesya RENARD. Especially for the youth Internet magazine Bullet.NET

Does a man really love with his eyes, and a woman with his soul?

What are the differences between female love and male love?

How to distinguish love from falling in love?

What does the phenomenon of love mean for a man and for a woman?

What place in life does love take for representatives of different sexes?

The nature of the mating strategy of a biological species of people

At the heart of marriage strategy men and women have the most important and strongest instinct - the continuation of the human race.

The need to preserve the species drives people through emotions. At the same time, people often do not realize the true motivation for their actions.

The primal instinct that arouses in a woman the desire to decorate herself does not say why she should do it - she just likes it. Logic dictates that women do this to attract male attention. It is interesting that the fair sex began to decorate themselves even before they put on their clothes.

So that she can choose, she needs to conquer the maximum number of men. Moreover, for a wider choice, there should be as many of them as possible. Ideal if she makes everyone fall in love male environment... But it will belong to one - the best. It turns out that the meaning of the female primitive marriage strategy is to have the largest possible number of fans.

By the way, in nature there is no such shameful phenomenon as rape. A female of any kind can refuse without having any consequences for herself.

From the standpoint of survival for a man, the main thing is to multiply his genetic heritage. He should look for as many partners as possible. Biologically, he has no obstacles - he can make children all his life.

A woman must start a family in order to raise children. The survival of the offspring is ensured by a full-fledged family, where there is a mother and a father - a breadwinner and protector. Love is an instinctive attachment of nature that prompts a fickle man to take care of his offspring.

Nowadays, there is no urgent need for the reproduction and preservation of the human species. But there remains a "memory", thanks to which a woman must fulfill her function of procreation. Without this, she cannot feel completely happy. Men do not necessarily want to marry and raise offspring.

So, a woman has an instinctive attitude toward "family", and a man is looking for "his place in life." Love, as one of the strongest instinctive feelings, is important for a woman emotionally and for fulfilling her female destiny.

The power of female love

If a woman made her choice and found her Man, she will follow him into fire and water. She is ready to cheer him up when he needs support, will be on his side, even when she is not entirely sure of his rightness, she will listen, even when his words are not at all worthy of attention.

Without taking into account his actions and the opinions of friends, suggesting that he is a weakling and a loser, despite his statements to end the relationship right now, she will live for him. And he will not stop fighting for his heart. Contrary to his statement about the inconsistency of her desire to wear the title of His One.

Women's love will overcome any temporary barriers and obstacles in life.

But a woman should not think that in return the man will love her the same way.

Therefore, male love is different and does not resemble female love.

A man loves a woman in his own way. He will not call her in half an hour to tell her that at 5:30 he loves her more than at 5:00. He will not sit with a woman stroking her head when she is sick. It is absolutely unrealistic to count on such sacrificial love of a man.

However, male love is also love. Although it differs from the love given and desired by women.

What are the manifestations of male love?

Men love differently than women. Loving man will be ready to do three things that serve as a manifestation of his love: inform about his love, contain and protect.

A manifestation of true male love is his willingness to tell everyone: "This is my woman"... The woman will be given an official status with a rank higher than just the title of "my friend". This status indicates that he placed a woman in his heart.

This is an opportunity to inform the environment that he is proud of the right to be close to a woman, that he has serious plans for her. This is an application for a long-term cordial relationship. This is a conditional code that tells other men "no move."

If you have been dating for more than three months and do not even know his friends, but, introducing him, he introduces you, his girlfriend, then there is no place for you in his plans for the future.

A man's vocation to provide

For thousands of years, a man has been convinced of his primary purpose - to provide for his family. Under any circumstances, loved ones should not be needy. To become a breadwinner is the meaning of a man's vocation.

Sometimes he just had to meet a woman who would reveal his best qualities: a real woman knows how to convince a man to be a breadwinner.

The man is your protector

If a man loves, anyone who simply thinks of offending or offending his woman runs the risk of being destroyed. The man will sweep everything in his path to make sure that everyone who disrespectfully treats you paid for it. This is its nature.

Three key needs of a man

Family support

Men need to feel supported, like they are kings, even if they are not.

The man is constantly on alert, observing and evaluating other men nearby. At any time, he is ready to protect you and all his achievements. Therefore, it is important for him to relax at home. He needs to hear: “Darling, thank you. We love you and need you, we are happy that we have you. "

It is important for them to feel like kings, even when they are not behaving like royalty. Trust me, the more you let them feel special, the more they will be able to give to you.

Female loyalty

Devotion is the masculine understanding of feminine love. Devotion and love are synonyms for a man. The love that a woman demands is beautiful, but a man's love is different from a woman's. She is different. A man's love is an amazingly powerful thing. If the female devotion is true, the man will indeed finish off anyone for you without hesitation.

Sex is like air to him

There is nothing else in the world that men would also like constantly and strongly, without which they simply cannot live. A man has a physical need to be associated with the woman he loves. And he realizes this connection by making love to her.

Sensual emotions, hugs, emotional conversations - men do this because it is important for women. At the same time, you need to understand that sex connects a man with a woman. This is for him to connect, recharge and re-contact.

For most men, the need for sex is the same as for air. Even if a man loves you very much, but at the same time you dose sex, he will have to find it elsewhere. Men understand that different circumstances are possible. You can't just come up with excuses ad infinitum. No matter how much a man loves you, no matter how much he values ​​his status as head of the family and master of the house, as soon as you try to dose sex, problems will surely arise.

Support. Devotion. Sex. You must meet these key needs of a man. And in return you will get a man who can move mountains for you and do whatever you want.

How many women suffer from the fact that they cannot get from their men the love that they expect.The key words here are "the love they are waiting for."

The methods of obtaining can be different:

Seemingly adaptive: love me as I want, in discussions with a man, regular requests, such as: stay with me, give me gifts, make surprises, and, of course, a favorite question: "And do you love me?"

Selfish and non-adaptive:

I will do my best to satisfy his needs in the ways that I expect from him, he will understand (guess) and begin to do the same for me.

Tantrums and claims.

I will leave and he will understand, appreciate and win me back.

But in all these ways the most main mistake that women rarely understand male psychology and how a man generally loves.

And a man loves in a slightly different way than a woman.

FEMALE:

"I love you"- it means: I spend time with you, embracing; I tell you about my love, I care about you like a mother, I talk-talk-talk about my love for you and I say it again. I remember all our small and big dates and I give you pretty trinkets, I place our photos everywhere.

THE MALE:

"I love you" means:

1. I show you to the world: I show everyone and everything that you are mine. This means that I introduce you to your parents, friends, when I walk down the street, I hug you or hold your hand. If I see that they are looking at you, then I immediately grab you by some part of the body.

2. I protect you: I protect you physically from problems; I will replace the wheel on the car for you if you punctured it; if someone raised his voice at you, I will kick his face or stand in front of you and look up at him so that it will not seem a little; I will protect you morally, if you cry, I cannot bear it and I start to do something to cheer you up.

3. I want to provide for you and fulfill your desires: I pay with pleasure for you, because you are mine, I fulfill your desires and feel needed by you, I want your lifestyle to suit you and you smile, I will provide our children with everything necessary.

Do you see the difference?

Yes, a man can rarely say in words "I love you" and delight you with surprises in the form of flowers for no reason or some other romance. But does this mean that he does not love you?

Look deeper: do you really need a woman from your man or mother's love? Or you just need to learn to see male?

What will a man become if he begins to love you as a woman? Will he be able to fulfill his male roles to the fullest and be the wall you dream of? Or do you dream about girlfriend?

In love, men and women behave differently. Before a man realizes that he loves a woman and desires Serious relationships, his feeling goes through several emotional stages.

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A man needs feelings to be realized, and a decision made with a cool head. Many men choose to act either emotionally or logically. And to bring the mind and feelings into harmony, they need a certain time.

What can cause feelings?

It is impossible to understand by what principles men fall in love. Falling in love begins with attraction, emotions that defy explanation and reasoning. The pounding of the heart is felt more distinctly at the sight of a beloved girl. The prerequisites are absolutely individual: smiles, random words, timid actions, but at a certain moment they become the source of incipient feelings. Mentality, character, experience in relationships, upbringing - all this determines how men fall in love.

Often, a deep realization that a man can be surrounded by the attention and care of a woman he likes prompts him to fall in love. On an unconscious level, a man catches a possible reciprocity, so he begins to look for a girl's company. He does not fully realize why he feels this way, but he notes something special in his lady that the rest do not have.

Stages of love

In psychology, there are seven stages of the process of the birth of love in men:

1. 1. Evaluation of external data.
2. 2. Interest, due to which there is an intention to create a relationship.
3. 3. Attraction: if a lady accepts the courtship of a gentleman, he develops a pronounced attraction and desire to develop communication. At this stage of falling in love, a man tries to charm her in order to invite her out on a date. The woman supports him with minor reciprocal signs of attention.
4. 4. The desire to impress, to touch the lady's attention and her feelings.
5. 5. Confidence in his choice: sympathy is confirmed, the guy takes measures to fall in love with his chosen one, often thinks about her.
6. 6. Reflections on the prospects for the development of relations: there are meetings and communication between a guy and a girl. At this stage, a man reflects on all the advantages and disadvantages of the union, deciding how to take the relationship to the next level.
7. 7. Re-persuasion: The man tries to understand his partner's feelings.
8. 8. Falling in love comes with the conscious intention to create a serious relationship.

Behavior and feelings of men

Men are less focused on emotions than women. Rarely does a man decide to marry based only on what he feels. He assesses many factors: the reliability of the partner, her environment, age. If there is a negative experience of a relationship and a person is wary of feelings, then he falls in love for a long time, looking closely and analyzing, but not showing himself emotionally.

If there is only a need for sex, which is not supported by the partner, then the man's feelings disappear just as quickly, and it becomes clear that he did not expect more. If a person is more inclined to emotional attachment, then his feelings will be relatively long and constant.

The straightforwardness of a masculine character does not require speculation, but in many cases young people analyze the relationship, while assessing their chances of forming an alliance with a woman. They ask themselves questions about the correspondence to each other and compatibility, the deep meaning of the relationship, their impressions, draw conclusions based on what they feel on a date with a girl. You may not notice that a person is experiencing any emotions while he maintains his distance and analyzes everything that is happening.

Signs of falling in love are manifested taking into account the preferences, taste, intelligence, and upbringing of a man. These include:

• change from the usual shyness to decisiveness, activity; gaiety - to secrecy and isolation;
• the desire to take care of a woman in important and small things;
• having a constant interest in your beloved;
• passivity and boredom in the absence of a partner, and vice versa;
• search for a reason for communication, an attempt to meet the eyes, touch the beloved;
• attention: first of all, in the company of friends, it will be chained to the beloved girl;
• unconscious copying of the interlocutor's actions, called "mirroring".

Sexual attraction cannot be characterized as falling in love: it is passion, affection, interest, which still does not give grounds for building a serious relationship.

Signs of desire for intimacy:

• an evaluating look at a woman from the bottom up, in which greed is visible, in contrast to the tenderness of a loving gaze;
• indifference to the thoughts, feelings, dreams of the partner, interest exclusively in intimate relationships;
• tense behavior, possible defensive reactions in the form of caustic phrases, painful sensitivity or rudeness.

What causes falling in love?

In accordance with the peculiarity of male perception, if the guy did not like the girl's appearance, then it is hardly worth counting on reciprocity and the development of relations.

However, in addition to appearance, a woman must have appropriate qualities that are capable of evoking quivering feelings. Each man has his own preferences, but among them there are four main types:

A man is imbued with a feeling for that woman, which corresponds to his individual concepts of mental comfort, but not every love goes into true love... In communication, a deeper unity is achieved, or, over time, disappointment comes, freeing the soul to love another.

Therefore, if love visits an internally mature man, he hides his feelings until he is able to understand whether he can call the woman his own.

Women talk about matters, insignificant things, and men listen to them, moving away from romantic experiences. If the ladies allowed themselves to be soft, to show hidden feelings, they would receive the same in return.

If a woman manages to show sensuality without risking her self-control, at a stage when a man does not yet allow himself frank confessions, then a passionate and exciting relationship is possible between partners.

Feelings of a married man

If a man is not free, but caring for another woman, several factors could have pushed him to this: lack of love in family life, haste to get married, lack of compatibility with the spouse, disappointment. His search is not complete, and the marriage does not exhaust the existing problem.

A common situation is when a man needs newness, and his attention is constantly shifting to new women. Such a partner is concentrated on his own feelings, and the inner world of the chosen one is of little interest to him. In such a relationship, his self-centeredness is especially pronounced.

Signs of falling in love will be noticeable to a careful look: from a brave man, a man can turn into a modest admirer, from a shy guy into a brave knight. If a person hides feelings, you should not rush him, you should allow him to sort out them. But if people have known each other for a long time, it is useful to take a step towards each other.

And a little about secrets ...

The story of one of our readers Alina R .:

My weight was especially depressing for me. I gained a lot, after pregnancy I weighed like 3 sumo wrestlers together, namely 92 kg with an increase of 165. I thought my stomach would come off after giving birth, but no, on the contrary, I began to gain weight. How to deal with rebuilding hormonal background and obesity? But nothing disfigures or makes a person younger than his figure. In my 20s, I first learned that overweight girls called "WOMAN", and that "this size is not sewn." Then at 29, divorce from her husband and depression ...

But what can you do to lose weight? Laser liposuction surgery? Recognized - at least 5 thousand dollars. Hardware procedures - LPG massage, cavitation, RF lifting, myostimulation? Slightly more affordable - the course costs from 80 thousand rubles with a consultant nutritionist. You can of course try to run on a treadmill, to the point of insanity.

And when to find all this time? And it's still very expensive. Especially now. Therefore, for myself, I chose a different way ...