It is very difficult to meet the only one, but still harder for a girl find a real friend. Someone is convinced that there is no friendship between a man and a woman. But I know that's not true at all! Because I had such a friendship, even though it is a sad story. At 16 years old I was the loneliest girl on the whole planet, or so it seemed to me. How can you upset a clever girl, an excellent student, a favorite of the family and teachers? Of course, an unrequited first love. He was older, prettier, more sociable and very handsome. I, due to my proud nature, did not show suffering and torment, although I was on the verge of despair. Having received the first four in my life for an essay, I realized that this is it, my tragic fall into the abyss. Mom remained happily unaware of what was happening to her daughter, my friends shrugged their shoulders, not knowing how to help, and at this most difficult moment, a friend appeared in my life. Not fictional, but real.

Now I can't say at what moment we became truly friends and I realized that I was interested with this person, that he invisibly puts his shoulder whenever I stumble. He studied a class younger than me, was reckless and carefree. We talked before, but it was only that spring that I noticed that he was very particular about me, and about my friends - otherwise ... Well, I just hear whisper-screams-disappointed sighs: “Well, so he I was in love ... ”But nothing of the kind! While I silently suffered from my love, he was courting another girl with might and main. Soon, their relationship grew into a romance. We were just friends. Friend-li-li. Chatting about something, discussing, fooling around. The only topic we have put a taboo on is our personal relationships with boyfriends / girlfriends. And they strictly adhered to this.

Sometimes he accompanied me home after dancing (if his girlfriend stayed at home that day), and I treated him to sweets. Sometimes he called late at night and asked cheerfully: "Are you sleeping?" And after hearing an angry rebuke that decent people give other decent people enough sleep, he hung up the receiver with laughter. We often walked home together with him and my classmate after school. When we were in the same company, he came up and in a whisper asked: "Is everything okay?" And once, during an excursion in nature, he brought a bunch of some unknown wildflowers to me and proudly presented them. He also brought me my favorite chocolate bar for my birthday - we agreed not to give gifts to each other ... Now I don’t even remember how many little things and pleasantries he did. To some, all this will seem a trifle, but for me then these were salutary signs of attention. And it was he who made the most sincere and wonderful compliment when he saw me in prom dress, - just whistled. But how delighted it sounded ...

We could not see each other and not talk for weeks, but I always knew that it was worth calling him or asking for something - he would be there, he would do everything. And I tried to answer him in kind. After the eleventh grade, I entered the university and left for another city. Then there were no cell phones yet, and the Internet was not in every home, so our communication was halved. But as soon as I came to visit my parents, we definitely saw him. Let in fits and starts, albeit occasionally, but the thin thread of friendship did not break and seemed stronger than the lasting one. After graduating from the university, I started working, and he stayed there, hundreds of kilometers away. We almost stopped seeing each other and communicating, but I was always warmed by the thought that he is, my reliable best friend.

And then something happened that I least expected: he got married. Moreover, he married my very close friend, who for some reason had stopped communicating with me just a year before. I was not invited to the wedding, however, I did not expect this. But I was just perplexed: why did none of the two people so close to me even hint at this relationship? ..

He, already married, I met by chance, in a store. He grew under meter ninety, matured. And when he came up to me with a joyful smile and hugged me tightly, I had to stand on tiptoe to kiss me on the cheek. He was in a hurry, and so was I. We quickly told each other about the news, exchanged phone numbers and agreed not to disappear. He called once - two days later. And that's all ...

Five years have passed since I had not seen or heard him. Now we live in the same city, but it seems - in different universes. I know from mutual acquaintances that my former best friend and close friend live together and seem to be quite happy. I'm happy for both of them. It’s just bitter that I suddenly became unnecessary, superfluous in the life of people dear to me. Why? I do not know. My conscience is absolutely clear: I have never felt anything romantic for him, never for all the time I had the question “what would happen if we became closer?”. And I did not betray my friend, I did not substitute. One wise woman answered my sincere perplexed questions: “Do you really not understand that they were jealous of you? And just eliminated as a dangerous rival? " Am I a dangerous rival ?! Are you seriously?! Perhaps I do not understand something, perhaps I am too naive. But does the friend, whom we have known all our life and in our youth went through fire, water and copper pipes, does not know that I am not capable of such a thing? It turns out no. And it makes it even harder.

Once our mutual friend told me that he asked about me: how am I doing, how I live, what is new with me. He said that he missed and it would be nice to see each other. And all the same, he did not call, did not write even once in the endless five years. All our communication comes down to the fact that they write me a faceless sms-ku in verses for my birthday from her phone, and in response I write congratulations on her birthday. And that's all. I hesitate to call him - least of all I want to cause discord in their family ...

If someone told me this story, I would not have believed it - it is too theatrical, in the style of Hollywood melodramas. But all this actually happened to me. The same friend of mine who noticed that there is no friendship between a man and a woman, after listening to my story, sighed heavily: “Yes, you are just perverts, I’ll tell you ...” But I’m still sure: we were real friends. And the notorious friendship between a man and a woman exists. It's just that sometimes it turns out to be tied with such a thin thread that someone else can easily break this thread. It happened with us, and in the end I lost both my friend and my friend. As it turned out, such a friendship is too fragile, and the female one is insidious and unreliable. However, this is another story, more on that another time.

I wanted to write about the great female bug - Navigator.

No, the great female bug is the Great Navigator.

Thanks to this bug, many women do not live in marriage, but in hell, but they are well aware that if they throw their hose on the couch, the next one will be even worse. And this is true. While the Great Navigator is with you, women, or rather in you, all men will turn into hoses on sofas. And those who have a fundamentally active life position will run away from you.

I will definitely write about this great bug.

But now it's Friday story. Not exactly about this bug, or rather, not only about it.

Please analyze this story. Tell us what is in it, how and why.

One woman had a girlfriend. From student years. A fragile brunette with narrow wrists who smoked beautifully, crossing her legs.

The woman herself, very young then, Olya, was also pretty, but in body, with beautiful breasts... And so she looked at this friend of hers, Alya, about whom all the guys were crazy, and thought it was because she was very graceful, thin, everyone wanted to surround her with care.

Olya had a beloved boyfriend, they played a student wedding in order to get a room in a hostel, but the whole life somehow gradually fell on Olya's shoulders. Her husband didn't really need anything. There is food, he will eat, but no, he will go to someone's place and eat there, and if there is nowhere to eat, then he will not eat. But Olya could not do that, she was a responsible person and if there was no food, she got it. I mined in different ways, saved or earned. But Olya saved her money and her husband's money. And she earned herself, and drove him. Well, because he is a donkey, he may not eat anything, but Olya knew for sure that it was imperative to eat. Therefore, from the first year of marriage, she learned to use rolling pins. The forceps never helped much. The husband quickly mastered the hose and the tongs did not notice her. Therefore, only a rolling pin, only hardcore.

But Alya was completely different. She would come to visit someone, sit down, cross-legged, smoke and shake off the ashes, and by some miracle, drinks and treats would appear in front of her. When Alya came to visit Olya with her husband, her husband immediately began to fry potatoes, and if there were no potatoes, he ran away and borrowed it from someone in the hostel. Olya explained this to herself by the fact that Alya is beautiful and feminine. And so fragile that everyone wants to take care of her. And no one wants to take care of her, of Olya, because she is in the body, such a mighty, strong woman. Like a man!

And Olya hated her strength, cursed, and envied Alina's weakness.

After college, Olya divorced her husband, lost a lot of weight, did not go to work in her specialty, but took up creativity. She wanted to be like Alya, graceful, out of this world. She even started smoking, although she was disgusted for a long time. Olya turned from a blonde to a graceful brunette, her breasts almost completely disappeared, her wrists became narrow. She ate little and lived poorly, waiting for someone who wants to take care of her. But that was not the case. Once a musician, with whom Olya fell in love for a short time, told her that she was like a mole, just as lifeless and weak, there was no sex in her. But Olya decided not to succumb to manipulation and remembered well what the role of a strong woman leads to. Then she found herself a man who promised to take care of her, but kept forgetting about his promises. He came and did not pay attention to the fact that Olya had no food at all. When Olya showed him the empty refrigerator, he was very distressed. Then Olya began to remind him in advance, one day in advance, so that he would not forget to buy her groceries and other necessary things. He still forgot all the time or did not come at all, Olya swore with him and soon the man said goodbye to her, saying that she was hanging on him all the time and whining like a helpless child, and he didn’t want to be a daddy.

At this time, she met Alya. Alya has changed a lot. She recovered, became brown-haired, quit smoking. She had a husband, she worked in her specialty and made plans for her own business. While Olya and Alya were chatting in the cafe, her husband called Ale a few times and asked what to buy, and then wondered where she was and how long she would stay there. In the end, the husband himself showed up for Alya, although she asked not to worry and go home. Olya saw handsome man, who carefully scanned her with a glance and did not find anything suspicious, lost all interest in her. It seemed to Olya that she looked more interesting than the plump Ali, but her husband pulled Alya home and kissed her on the ear and shoulder several times while persuading her to go. "She doesn't rest at all," he said. "Only work, meetings, work, meetings, and she needs to sleep. Bath, massage, sex and sleep, that's what we have now according to plan." The man again took care of Ale, but no one wanted Olya.

After analyzing the meeting with Alya, Olya came to the conclusion that one should become a businesswoman. You have to work hard, lead an active life, so that men consider every minute spent with them - happiness, so that they save her from work. Not immediately, but Olya managed to become a business woman from a moth, not a business woman, but she took on various jobs and occupied herself tightly. However, the men from her life completely disappeared. No one paid attention to her, and she felt like a horse in a harness. She got herself married lover, but he was completely satisfied with rare meetings, and when Olya endured a date, he was not upset or jealous. He was glad that Olya did not ask for meetings more often. Olya went in for sports, visited a beautician, she looked very good and did not understand why a prince was not in her life. Once she almost began an affair with a colleague, they both got drunk on a business trip and kissed. But a colleague suddenly told her that it was better to stop. When Olya asked what scares him, he said: "You are such an imperious, such a strong woman, I will not pull you, I feel small with you."

Olya called Ale to directly ask her how to become weak, but so weak that men would not call her a lifeless moth, but rejoice at her weakness and protect her. Alya said that she was on maternity leave with her second child and did not work. She called her to her. Olya arrived and saw even more plump Alya, who nevertheless smiled and beamed. She said that her husband's business went uphill and he persuaded her to sit with the children, not work, but when her second child is two years old, she will definitely go into the business that she dreamed of. Olya saw that Ali had au pair, she had a big house, and even a gardener, that is, Ali had a lot of free time, despite the children. Olya scolded Alya that she is not engaged in a figure and has excess weight, but Alya waved her hand, saying that the chef cooks so deliciously, and her husband constantly drags him to restaurants, and with such a good and calm life losing weight is difficult. Olya recalled the graceful beauty Alya from her student years and did not recognize her in this new woman. Olya even hinted to Ale if she was afraid that her rich husband would find a model for himself, but Alya laughed and said that if he did, she would not interfere, she loves too much to interfere.

Olya complained to Ale about the failures in her personal life, she said that she tried to be weak, and strong, and businesslike, but there was no point, she wasn’t good with men. Alya sympathized with Olya, said that she looked great, but too tense, as if she was in a very active search and she desperately needed sex. Olya was offended, thinking that a well-fed does not understand a hungry person. Then Alya said that she had a great neighbor, his house is even better than Ali's and her husband's, he is divorced, a handsome man, a businessman and an athlete. Alya offered to introduce Olya, she called her neighbor, saying that she would like to come to him for tea with a friend, and the neighbor said that he would be home in an hour and was waiting for them.

Olya and Alya went to a neighbor. The neighbor really turned out to be as Alya described. But already in the middle of the tea party, Olya realized that he was in love with Alya. He looked at her, not taking his eyes off, like all the boys in their student dormitory. Just like Ali's husband was in the cafe then. Olya's mood soured, she became gloomy and unhappy. And Alya behaved meanly, in her opinion. She allegedly praised Olya all the time, but the man joked in response, and she burst into such a seductive laugh that Olya understood that she was gluing this neighbor, and maybe even sleeping with him. That is, she used Olya as an excuse to see her neighbor in love.

After this meeting, Olya felt so humiliated that she wrote to Ali's husband from an anonymous account, finding him on social networks. She wrote that she works as a servant in his house, she cannot give herself away, but wants to warn that the neighbor is his wife's lover. The husband did not answer, he blocked her. Olya followed Ali's page for some time, trying to find signs of family quarrels or divorce, but she never found it. Maybe there were some showdowns, or maybe the husband didn’t say anything to Ale at all.

Relationships between girlfriends are far from always cloudless, but this does not mean that you should not be friends with girls. Or does it mean?

If you also have something to tell on this topic, you can absolutely free of charge right now, as well as support with your advice other authors who have found themselves in similar difficult life situations.

Just after graduating from the university, my friend immediately left for Turkey. Today I talked to her and she told me the good news: she is getting married. On the one hand, I am very happy for her, on the other, she said that her future husband is a Muslim (she is Orthodox). The future husband will not ask her to accept his faith, but who knows what will happen next ...

I believe that there is nothing wrong with interethnic marriages, the main thing is that there is mutual understanding. Of course, each nationality has its own mentality, its own laws, customs, traditions, religion, this also needs to be taken into account and studied. They love each other, but her parents are against this marriage. They said that if she married him, they would disown her and never forgive her. They explained this by the fact that they were afraid for her future life. They are afraid that he will force her to change her faith.

I was then 9 years old. I constantly wanted to get a fishing rod and now my dream has come true. Every summer I spend in the village, where I had a friend, Daniel, a year older, and my childhood friend, Diana.

In the next summer I came to my grandmother for a vacation. The fishing rod lay idle. I had no one to go fishing with. And then one fine day (at that time it did not seem so beautiful) two boys passed by our house - Misha and the same Daniel, they went fishing. Grandma suggested to me that she would ask them to take me fishing with them. I denied as best I could, but it is useless to go against my grandmother. Still, she asked them, and they took me.

It was kind of strange for me. After all, Misha was 2 years older, and Daniel was a year older. But to my surprise, they did not leave me aside, and told almost everything there is to know about fishing. And about the sinker, and about the bait, and about the bite, in general, about everything, and even taught how to properly hold the fishing rod and throw the hook.

I can't figure out what's wrong with my girlfriend. We have known her since the 1st grade, we talked well. In the 8th grade, we began to communicate less often. In the 9th grade, they began to communicate again. Everything seems to be good, but not very good. After we started talking again, she behaves strangely, unusual. I don’t know how to describe it normally.

I don’t know whether to be offended by my friends or not. We are in the 9th grade. They have a poor family. Despite this, we are friends, we have fun walking together. We go for a walk in one beautiful new district of our city. Today, the friends decided to unexpectedly go to a restaurant after a walk. We never went to restaurants before. To be honest, I myself have never been to restaurants, and friends with their parents are often, as I already understood.

In a month I am 17 years old and I would never have thought that I would write on the site to help me with advice.

I always try to support everyone, help, give light, and I always help myself (I don’t like to share my problems with people), so this is the first time I will write this. I have a difficult character, as my family and friends tell me. At first I didn’t believe it, I thought it would pass, but it all lasts 2.5 years. I became . Many do not understand me, during all this time I have lost many friends, the most faithful have remained, at least something makes me happy.

I am not quite the ideal person, which I considered myself to be almost all my life. For the first time, my best friend said to my face: "I hate you more than anyone else in the world." My life has turned upside down! Then I was told that I was selfish, narcissistic, deceitful and hypocritical. Yes, now I understand, I've always been like that.

This was a discovery for me. As if unconsciously, I did harm to people. “Only my problems are important! All people are mediocre! I am the ideal! " - so I thought. She poured compliments to friends, and then turned them into weak-willed dolls. And I continue to use people.

I need to communicate with people. I constantly need to talk to someone, I want people to also want to communicate with me. But instead, they just take advantage of me, people spend time with me just for their own benefit, or when there is no one else to communicate with, I always become a backup option. I am a reliable person and I cannot send those who turn to me for help to hell, but no one appreciates what I do for others.

I am 28. My husband is 37. The child is 4 years old. She got married at 23. I was always overweight, in childhood I was madly in love with sweets (sweets, buns), but I was always skinny, then I had measles (now I recently read that the hormonal balance is disturbed), came transition period and I was blown away.

In my youth and youth, I always had a complex about my appearance... Moreover, my mother added her own five kopecks. I will come from the institute, she meets me: “I recovered again. What to buy a new skirt again? " Everything inside me broke off at first, then I no longer paid attention to these reproaches, but since then I do not love myself. As psychologists say, "self-esteem suffers."

There were no suitors. So we could go somewhere a couple of times with a guy, then I became isolated, did not know how to behave and it all ended. My height is 168 cm, my weight at the institute is 78-82 kg. I could not lose weight, no matter how hard I tried. And I ran, and fitness and balanced nutrition, and diet, and fasting. For some time I held on, the weight did not decrease by a maximum of a couple of kilograms and that's it. The lack of result finished me off and I started to eat normally again and added a few more kilograms. So I crawled to 82 kilograms.

I am 16 years old, I go to school. I don’t know why, but I don’t care at all about the feelings of other people, even my parents. I have the so-called, but only so that it is not boring at school.

I don’t know why I’m so selfish, I never think about others, or rather I just don’t remember this person and don’t think that a person can be offended. It just doesn't matter to me. If I notice that I am offended, I will simply continue to pretend that I did not notice.