Hello. The child is 1.8 months old. I am 28, my husband is 36. Civil marriage is a year, plus a marriage is 2 years. We quarrel often. It has always been that way. The first year was spent on several. once a night. She wrote, called, came back, but never in the evening, always in the morning. With the birth, everything was aggravated. I can't drink a sedative to release insults on the brakes during fights, because I'm breastfeeding. Then it was that he was leaving for a couple of days. Lived in a hotel. Returned. Since January of this year, he left completely collecting things 3 times for 2-3 weeks, lives with his parents, so as not to spend on rent (as he says), returned, said that he would not leave again. The first time (2 weeks) -took out a loan of 300t.r. and bought a car. The second, a week later, moved out from his parents, rented a room, took out a loan of 100 thousand and 100 thousand on the card was postponed by us and spent everything as he says on clubs, restaurants, gasoline. At the same time, it was absolutely not a club, I wanted to live together and went only once. This is despite the fact that 100 thousand were set aside for the initial mortgage payment. Now, with a salary of 50 thousand, we pay 23 for apartments, 12 for loans, and we live on the rest. He says he did not change. I used to get paid 10 maternity. now nothing. In the fall I go to work because he does not have enough money. Sex once or twice (since January) a month, I never do it, but he says that after quarrels I don't want to. I ask: do you want me? She says that, on the contrary, I really want to. But things are still there. We swear for any reason. The initiators of the quarrels are both. In expressions we are not ashamed of both, but I never remember this to him, but he always remembers and says that this is the reason for his leaving and call it an act "on emotions." That I am not a man, he asks. During the leave, she never calls, does not write, does not ask as a child, maybe what is needed. Now he's gone again. Almost 3 weeks. Yesterday I sent 2 e-mail. letters of accusatory self-acquittal. There is no strength to respond to provocations and go through his "leaving at all" again the next time.
Question 2:
1.Does his care for his wife with a small child for 2-3 weeks justify and is this normal, adequate behavior in response to quarrels (that is, is it really so offending or is it a psychological problem that needs to be addressed). Is this commensurate: resentment from the words spoken and such a long withdrawal from his wife and small child when we need him and his help.
2. Is there a possibility that what actions (denial of the necessity and desire of marriage, indifference) can interrupt this sequence, or will it continue forever? In the sense that he changed for the worse: before marriage, he did not abandon us (then still me). In his previous marriage (10 years) he never (according to him) left. That is, this habit appeared in his Lately and only with me.

Only the advice of a psychologist, selected for a specific situation, when the husband left the family, will tell you how to behave, how to survive what happened without harm to yourself. However, some general recommendations still exist.

How should a woman behave after her husband leaves?

1. Crying is allowed. An outburst of negative emotions is a guarantee of a woman's somatic health. Relatives, supporting a woman in a situation of forced separation from her spouse, may advise "to calm down", "to keep in control", "not to get depressed." All this is true, but not at the first stage of habituation. Immediately after the husband leaves the family, you need to cry.

2. Think about children. Rather, about the resources for their life. The bottom line is that such a moment is discussed with her husband in a calm manner. Therefore, there are several steps to take when caring for children:

• If a woman is angry, learn to restrain herself, then arrange a meeting with her departed husband.
• If she still has no idea how to build a future life without him, she should meet in a common area, outside the walls of the house where the family lived.
• Until all the tears have been cried out, you should not make an appointment.

There is still a long way to forgiveness, acceptance of facts. But following the first two tips will help speed up the stage of accepting that the husband has left the family, creating the feeling of some kind of backup path.

How to behave if the husband left the family and does not want to communicate?

1. Do not take revenge. Fight thoughts of retribution to your spouse. Everyone will be rewarded according to their deserts (everyone remembers this). Alone with oneself, one can admit that an irresistible desire for the triumph of justice seems to be eating up a woman from the inside. You can — and best of all — discuss these thoughts with your spirit guide. From the point of view of a psychologist, such thoughts are inevitable and natural, but the psychologist will also restrain a woman from realizing them.

2. To help herself in the struggle with sinful thoughts (and with one more goal, which is designed for the long term), a woman should not say goodbye to her past life together as soon as possible. So, there is no need to tear or burn photos, spoil the video, especially when children are captured, destroy the things of the husband. While the mind is clouded with resentment and pain, you can commit acts, the results of which you will later regret.

Some time will pass, calmness will come, and memorable things will not be returned. Then, it is better to put down the hated at the moment little things and remove them away from your eyes. And then, quarrels can be temporary. No one excludes the possibility of reconciliation and the fact that after some time the husband will return to the family.

3. “Time heals” is a common phrase, its essence is debatable, but there is also a rational kernel.

• Someone thinks that it is not time that heals, but rather the one who replaces the lost energy heals. Someone believes that time helps to forget. Someone says that time only hurts more. Most likely, such judgments are based on their own experience.
• One thing is clear: over time, everything that happened will be perceived from a completely different perspective. And, yes, it will become easier - it doesn't even matter whether someone replaces the departed man, or the woman is distracted by creativity, otherwise she realizes herself. The task of a woman is not to postpone such a moment, not to rush, but patiently wait for the approach of a qualitatively different state of consciousness.

By the way, it is at this stage that the desire to take revenge, to get angry, to seek the truth, to prove one's own innocence recedes. It might be worth encouraging yourself by promising that one day it will become easier and easier.

From life. Alena was going through a divorce from her husband. He changed completely imperceptibly, quickly - she did not prepare for his departure in any way. As they say, like a bolt from the blue - this is how the husband left the family. Alena was very difficult, especially since she had to communicate with her husband when he came to visit the children. In her youth, the girl experienced parting with a man whom she loved very much. She remembered that there comes a moment when everything passes. Day after day she waited for this moment.

Each person in his own way perceives the fact of the ensuing calmness. Someone is sad, someone is happy. Fair in relation to yourself, perhaps you need to wait for indifference. One that is perceived as day or night, like a sunrise or rain in the fall, such as exists here and now. So the woman was healed.

semejnoeschaste.ru

• Don't try to get revenge on your spouse. cheating on him or finding a new man. This act will be a selfish attempt by a capricious girl to attract attention to herself.
• Do not share your "grief" with everyone around you. putting a spouse in a bad light. Complaining about your husband is a wrong decision, which will not give a positive result, but will only provoke his dissatisfaction.

TIP! Inevitable meetings with children are another option to try to improve relationships and let the departed man know that he is still loved.

1lustiness.ru

What to do when the husband leaves the family?

Each of us cherishes dreams of a strong family, so often the departure of a spouse becomes not only a sudden, but also a frightening event.

Sometimes a woman herself closes her eyes to the approaching denouement, sometimes she is really confident in the strength family relations... Many are lost in a situation if the husband has left home: the advice of a psychologist will help to build their behavior correctly, to avoid tantrums and scandals.

No matter how the situation with parting is resolved: will the husband return to the bosom of the family or leave his once beloved spouse forever - it is important for a woman to save herself and survive the situation as calmly and restrained as possible.

How to behave after your husband leaves

After a man leaves, the reasons for the separation should be carefully analyzed, even if he simply decided to temporarily live separately. You can never indiscriminately consider the man himself to be the culprit: it is likely that the reason is the behavior of his wife, family troubles or infidelity.

What is most important if the husband has left home: the advice of a psychologist is as follows - to preserve their own dignity and create an image of an unbroken and strong woman in the eyes of the spouse. Be that as it may, he must remember his wife not asking or crying, but sane and understanding.

Awareness of the mistakes made and the identification of situations that could have caused the conflict can be considered half of the work on establishing, if not rebuilt family life, then, at least, a normal relationship with the departed husband.

It is important to start analyzing your family life not in a rush, but after the first pain has passed, and the opportunity to think sensibly appears. Indeed, in any break, there are always two guilty ones: there is no need to shift the blame onto the second participant, as well as consider only yourself to be guilty.

Sometimes women prefer not to think about what to do if the husband has left the family, and just go with the flow. However, such a position is futile: letting go of the situation without striving to correct what was done is to sign your own helplessness or admit your guilt.

How to behave correctly after breaking up?

You can often hear from a woman: "My husband left me: how to get through this?" In such a situation, her feelings and experiences should be in the first place for a woman.

• Do not try to take revenge on your spouse by cheating on him or finding yourself a new man. This act will be a selfish attempt by a capricious girl to attract attention to herself.
• Don't try hard to get the man back. Pressure on him, arouse pity, blame and threaten him is not worth it - thereby women push the departed husbands away from themselves even further.
• You should not share your "grief" with everyone around you, exposing your spouse in a bad light. Complaining about your husband is a wrong decision, which will not give a positive result, but will only provoke his dissatisfaction.
• Find an outlet for yourself. You should not plunge into depression or engage in looking for shortcomings in yourself - all your strength should be directed to creation and improvement. A new hobby, a favorite job - these are activities that will allow you to become happier, and therefore more successful and calmer.
• Keep the skill to love and be loved. Feelings for ex-husband will remain pure and light, even if they are never reciprocal. But it is very important to preserve kindness and mercy, the ability to forgive the wrongdoer and allow love to reunite the family.

In a family with children, if the husband leaves, it is important to maintain "neutrality." Children should not be turned against the departed father, blamed or manipulated in an attempt to return the spouse to the family. Children must understand and feel the love of both parents, and their peace must be lasting, regardless of the relationship between the parents.

ADVICE! Inevitable meetings with children are another option to try to improve relationships and let the departed man know that he is still loved.

For strong women, there should be no questions “what to do if the husband left”: a self-sufficient person will proudly accept any blow of fate.

Survive and transfer difficult situation, to draw the right conclusions and embark on the path of creation and love - this is the true path of a real woman, wife and mother.

And the most important advice

If you like to give advice and help other women, take a free coaching training from Irina Udilova, master the most demanded profession and start receiving from 30-150 thousand:

www.grc-eka.ru

But I don't want to leave him, I can't live without him

You are already without him ...

I don't understand if he loves me, but he says so sincerely that he loves.

Well, imagine that your husband honestly admits to you that he has been doing for a long time in fact, from which you stubbornly disown. Like, dear, I'm tired of straining for the sake of relationships, fulfilling my duties. I love you, but I want to walk. And with you I don't get what I want. You have to answer for you, and there, in the club, there is a girl with whom everything is easy and she does not demand to answer for her. Well, or something like that. What will happen to both of you if he honestly tells you not only about what he is talking about, but also about what he is silent about. And you tell him? What will each of you experience, how will you react? Can you hear each other? Understand? Forgive? Or maybe even let go? Honest conversation is not easy! And this is the responsibility of both: yours, Karina, and your husband. And as long as you both hold onto the truth, you are upholding the status quo. Yes, you are not very comfortable with this, but you both fear the truth more than this uncomfortable.

It seems to me that you, Karina, do not understand your attitude towards him either. You say you love him. In fact, everything, as you describe, says that you want to love him ... You only want to, but this does not happen. With attention, with constant presence, with care from him. This is exactly how he does not apply to you.

You, oddly enough, look more traitorous to yourself than your husband. All that is valuable in your life, love, attention, care, your husband puts aside - this is his choice. But you yourself do not put your life values ​​and needs aside. You just gave them up. You don’t love yourself, don’t pay attention to your desires, don’t care about your needs, don’t keep your dignity.

For example, why not leave the child to his father on the weekend in the morning and go on a spree on her own? Don't you, a young girl, need freedom, rest, fun? Responsibility for oneself is precisely to exercise your right to be happy, and not to sit in sacrificial sadness and wait, it is from someone. If you love yourself, you will attract the same love to yourself from another. In the meantime, all that you attract is the pity and suppressed anger of your husband towards you for expecting more from him than you can give yourself.

I don’t understand what to do

So far, as I understand it, you want your husband to change. It can change when you change. The truth is not the fact that after that he will suit you. The changes may end fabulously well, or they may end in divorce, and with your filing, simply because you will no longer need such a husband who has remained the same. But all this is only if you yourself want and are ready for changes. And this is working with a psychologist. It is not possible to help someone who does not even want to get up to move.

You, Karina, are young, you have the time and energy to pull yourself out of the victim state.

All the best!

Stankevich Anzhelika Vyacheslavovna, psychologist Minsk

Question to the psychologist:

I ask for help. There is no strength to endure! I don't want to live. I am married, but as if without a husband.

The situation is as follows. Married for 2 years, have a daughter for 1 year. The child is very active, capricious - it requires a lot of energy and attention, I get tired for days. And zero support from her husband. More and more often he breaks down, humiliates me, yells, can push me, makes me hysterical and ... runs away. moreover, on the sly and without explanation, but with things. Blames me for everything - they say, I provoke, I am mad, etc. Although I ask for basic things - help and at least some attention.

When they met, he was white and fluffy, but now it was as if he had changed ... A year ago, after a quarrel, he asked for forgiveness and lived in perfect harmony for at least a month, swore that he would not run away, that he understood everything, etc. But in fact, everything is getting worse and worse every day ... He can say that he hates, that I am nobody, that I am his worst mistake in life ... He leaves, does not pick up the phone - and he does not hover that I am with the baby alone, that something can happen, etc.

And I, fool, forgive. I love.

I am very afraid of divorce. I don’t even know how to explain. I do not depend on him financially, he lives in my apartment. But I can't live without him ..... He's out the door - and I have hysterics that I have no strength.

Parents and friends are tired, apparently, to support, they say, since you endure, it means you like this attitude, and there is no one to cry ...

Help .... Or how to break this relationship, or how to explain to a person that you cannot run away from problems and quarrels ... He is a man, he is 32 years old.

He was with a drinking family, then an unsuccessful marriage (they say his wife was walking) - I felt sorry for him, tried to show what a family is - comfort ... and it, on the contrary, apparently annoys him ... (For example - I ask - warn me, that you are late - he told me - that I have to report)

And the most offensive thing is that he achieved the fact that I believe that no one needs me, that I will not succeed with anyone, and that I myself am to blame for everything ...

Although before, I would only twist at my temple for this. I have a higher education, wealthy parents, won prizes in various beauty contests. And now ... I'm sitting at home. the roof is going. and I don't want to live ...

I tried to take him to church, took him to the grandmothers (they thought maybe the former did damage, maybe also spoils our life from time to time), asked to drink a course of sedatives, he agrees, then again the quirk and that's it ...

Psychologist Tatyana Aleksandrovna Leonova answers the question.

Hello Irina. Your situation is quite complex, but it is also very common. The problem of mutual understanding between spouses very often arises in the first year of a child's life. Family attitudes and the level of responsibility play a role here. You write that before everything was different, while you were free, worked and did not have to stay at home with your child. You were probably also tired and asked for help, but these problems were easier to solve, since there were no such quarrels. Right? And now “I'm sitting at home. the roof is going. " Of course, two people are involved in the emergence of the conflict and its resolution. And his leaving home, it's just the impossibility to resist you. "I have a higher education, wealthy parents" "He is from a drinking family." This will certainly affect the way you and he communicate. You are giving reasons that he cannot verbally resist, therefore, the only thing he can do is leave.

Irina, I understand that you want to find the answer to the question "How to get him to help and enter into a dialogue in conflicts." But before deciding this issue, you need to improve relations so that he wants to come home, stops considering marriage with you a mistake, so that he becomes comfortable. When there is a fight, do you get your way? Does he come afterwards and help you? If not, then this method does not work. Consequently, you are wasting your resources on a quarrel instead of wasting it on the world. Try to change your strategy and stop conflicting about help first.

The apartment became empty, the soul was melancholy. And in my head there is only one thought - how to get my husband back home.

Don't make new mistakes

There is always a chance for the husband to return to the family. The faithful is still marked in the passport as a legal spouse, and we have the right to communicate with him. No need to wave your passport at a meeting in an attempt to reason with him. Or constantly call, beg for forgiveness, try to pity. The seal can be easily removed if the wife behaves too aggressively. And pleading instead of sympathy can cause contempt and disdain.

Running around your friends in search of support and help is also not an option. First, each person has a different perspective on problems. What works for one person often harms the other.

Secondly, one of the girlfriends may start hunting for someone else's husband. And even say nasty things about his wife. And we ourselves in our hearts are able to tell about the faithful that which outsiders do not need to know.

Try not to yell at your spouse, do not throw tantrums. Aggression is not the best relationship building companion. All you can achieve with this behavior is to assure your husband that he did the right thing. Gain strength and courage to behave calmly in this situation.

Don't tearfully beg him to come back, don't humiliate yourself. He will pity you, but pity is not love. Make it clear that you are not one of those who are easily broken, that you are a strong and wise woman. This will at least arouse my husband's respect.

Do not blackmail him with children, apartment or others shared values... Men hate being pressured. Even if you force him to return, then normal life you will no longer have.

Don't ask him about your rival. He is in love. With foam at the mouth, he will protect his mistress, and remember all your sins. Don't torture yourself.

Do not try to take revenge on your husband by cheating. First, you won't feel better. Secondly, if the husband finds out about this, he will no longer want to return to you. Men treat their own infidelities easily, but women do not forgive.

It is better to be alone for now and figure out why the spouse left. And then draw up a plan of action. It will also depend on the cause of the breakup, the situation in the family before leaving, and on the character of the husband. Each case requires different actions, but there are general principles.

To get your spouse back

Try to look at the relationship in marriage from the perspective of an outsider. It is advisable to consult a psychologist for this - it is difficult to be impartial in such a situation. It is necessary to understand what happened - a pattern or a spontaneous outburst of emotions.

Perhaps the marriage has long been bursting at the seams, and we refused to admit it, did not try to do something. If so, then everything is natural. Parting would sooner or later happen as a natural stage in a relationship. The couple needs to understand how much they need each other. And then it remains to wait and maintain a good relationship.

If you still want to return your husband to the family, he should know that his half is yearning and waiting. Otherwise, the spouse may decide that he is not needed. And not to return, even if he himself goes mad in separation.

There may be other reasons for the rupture. The spouses lived as usual: they discussed family problems, argued, quarreled, reproached each other for something. But before the man was angry, he could be silent or shout, but he did not leave.

It turns out that the heat of emotions has become too strong. Who is to blame is not so important. It is necessary to keep a man from rash actions. In this state, he is able to file for divorce. Or have an affair to blow off steam and get revenge. Then it won't be easy to get the relationship back. So, the husband must be found, kindly, apologized. Let him get angry at first, but he will begin to calm down and will not commit reckless actions.

When family relationships are crumbling, it is especially important not to forget about the children. They suffer the most from the fact that dad is no longer around. Overcome your own weakness, become a support for them. But in any case, do not turn against your husband. Children really need a father. Losing love, respect for him is too difficult a test for the child's psyche. Let them see you. In addition to caring for the children, this is another part of our plan to bring my husband home.

During the breakup, try to become who you were before meeting him. After all, it was with that woman that he was once without memory in love. Take care of yourself, devote more time to caring for your appearance. Visit your friends, visit the fitness center, update your wardrobe. All this you do for yourself, not for him. You just have some free time to reclaim the chic that you had before you were mired in family life.

Be confident in yourself. When meeting with your husband, behave in such a way that he understands that he has offended you very much, but do not assume the appearance of a victim. Smile, speak calmly but slightly aloof. Now he probably expects a violent reaction from you - accusations, screams and tears. Show that you have pride and live peacefully without it.

During living together you probably have a common circle of friends and acquaintances. When the husband leaves, friends are divided into two camps: one on your side, the other on the side of the husband. Don't lure mutual acquaintances over to your side. Do not elicit from them the details of his personal life - this will become known to her husband and will only turn him away from you. Communicate with everyone as if nothing had happened. Avoid talking about breaking up - for sure you have other topics to discuss.

Make new acquaintances, surround yourself with interesting people. Go to the cinema, theaters, and events without it. Look for entertainment opportunities, fill your life with new events. But novels are not worth starting yet. First, make sure your husband is not returned. Or that in his presence there is no longer a need for him.

Don't think about running around fortune tellers and psychics. Their services are expensive and their services questionable. As a result, in addition to an empty house, we will get an empty pocket.

The best tactic is to wait. If a man lives with another girl, he will not necessarily be better with her than with you. The first romantic feelings will soon subside. They will be replaced by gray everyday life: dirty socks, a tasteless dinner, each other's unpleasant habits. You have lived with him for a long time and probably learned how to make his life comfortable. You know exactly what he likes for breakfast, how many suits to put on a business trip, what medicine to give for a cold. Your rival has no such advantage.

He is used to a well-established life, and building a new family means getting used to new rules. Not every man can experience such stress. So in most cases, husbands who abandoned their wives for their mistresses return home.

In any case, for a man to want to return, you need to talk to him. Calmly, kindly, frankly. If the spouse is too offended or angry, he may not agree to such a conversation. You should not insist. Please try again after a while. The main thing is that he could at least listen without answering anything. And it is important for a woman to choose the right words. Let's say it will be a monologue, but the husband will remember it. He will comprehend everything, draw conclusions and, most likely, return to the family.

The return of a man is possible after a divorce. The main condition, without which the further development of normal relations is impossible, is forgiveness. Only if you sincerely forgive each other can your family exist. Opportunities, resentments and mutual reproaches are the first path to defeat.

If the husband has an affair

The husband does not leave, but you know for sure that he has another. He deceives you, and you feel that you are losing your man. You shouldn't tell your husband that you know everything. Otherwise, you will either have to crush the resentment and live with him further, or demand a divorce. But you want to return your husband to the family.

Stop being self-deprecating in the first place. You are not at all scary, not stupid or fat. Husbands of even the most beautiful women give birth to mistresses.

Do not try to follow him, read SMS, ask friends about who your rival is. In any case, he will find out about your behavior, and this will cause him either pity or disgust. And if it comes to a showdown and he has to confess everything to you, it will be difficult to restrain his emotions. This will become another stone in your garden: you are a nervous hysterical, and she is a gentle, wise woman. If after all these events you stay with him, then he will understand that you cannot live without him, and will change, practically without hiding.

Having learned that her husband has an affair on the side, it is better to leave somewhere under a fictitious pretext. Give a vent to emotions and cry a lot, And on your return, act calmly.

All you have to do now is draw his attention to yourself. Change your habits. If his evening delays usually end in interrogation, start ignoring them. If you are engaged in everyday life all day, then you should rest and devote more time to yourself. Don't constantly think about how to get your husband back, just live for yourself.

Take care of your appearance urgently: change your hairstyle, style of clothing. Don't forget sexy underwear. But if you used to choose black satin sets, then try on something red or pink with lace. Let him accidentally see you in your new underwear before you go out. This will make him think that you are interesting to someone other than him. Jealousy is a rather serious reason to leave a successful relationship on the side for a while and seriously take up a wife who is "slipping away" from her hands.

Just do not really have a lover just in order to take revenge on the offender. Maybe some of the men will shake it up, but usually they do not forgive betrayal. This can be a great excuse to part ways with you officially.

Think about the mistakes you make in your life together. Maybe you are overwhelming your husband. Or maybe you seem so helpless and inept to him that you only irritate him. You know your husband very well and you will be able to understand what was wrong in you. Try to change internally - it cannot go unnoticed.

It is unlikely that a man will leave you during this time. Usually, such decisions are taken for a very long time. Unless you push him out of the house. Let him remember that you are the very woman he fell in love with years ago. This should be a powerful incentive to look at you in a new way - especially if you change internally in better side... And you yourself will be able to decide during this time whether you need this person, or you can calmly let him go to a new attachment.

Discussion 8

Similar materials

Hello! help me to cope with the problem - my husband, after each conflict, leaves the house in an unknown direction (it takes 3-4 hours in the evening or at 4 am), after trying on, he says that he was sitting, sleeping in the car. I don’t know how to react to such situations. I also tried to leave after conflicts (within a reasonable evening for 2 hours) ended in scandals, as if I was walking to the left. I failed to talk, saying that I don’t like your behavior (talking is useless, it closes up and is silent). Confusion is usually empty character, I’ll say something wrong and everyone flared up. as she says so that she does not stray from the path she marries, sit at home nanny the child /, I do not communicate with anyone except neighbors and parents) to which I said: do not touch my sore subject. , I already shuddered and I splashed tea in it with then I got together and did how he left home, though only for an hour, to the pharmacy and the store and the time was from 8 to 9 pm. I came and watched TV in silence and my husband went to bed. 4 in the morning I got up, got ready and left. I called my cell phone and asked where he was after long "no business of yours" said that at the station. , it’s somehow really doubtful, the train route (through the cities with which he works) is not connected with the work somehow. And so he didn’t spend the night at home! tired (we can not speak a word for a month), to leave by myself, there is also no desire to hang out (and she has nowhere to go and there is no one, not to her parents, to carry dirty linen), and it is impossible to talk, no matter how much I approach, I would not offer to find compromises - to all my proposals, the answer is - I don't want to, or I said and at least hurt yourself. By nature, I'm also not a gift I can freeze something like that, now I try to be silent not to contradict it and it feels like that, the more I indulge, I try to do as asked, but it turns out that it’s not enough. only one incident in life, which today! we are not walking together (there is no one to leave the child, even if there is something to go, there is nowhere with her husband to go to clubs, the cafe does not understand (you can eat at home), you can rarely download a movie film - we have different tastes and interests, the difference at the age of 11 is 23, my husband is 34). My husband has no friends (one and that in another city, all the others are just acquaintances, I have no girlfriends, I dispersed everyone, just like that the neighbors are on the street benches while the child walks). And the problem is that my husband does not have a sense of humor, he does not know how to have fun, to enjoy the little things of life, we laugh so rarely when I go to my parents, I laugh so much, I laugh so hard, and at these moments I catch myself thinking: I need to get some laughs a month ahead, because it’s like that at home. doesn’t happen. help me find a solution, I definitely won’t persuade me to go to a psychologist. Maybe there’s something wrong with me? and anxiety that something is going to happen again and again. I have a feeling in my soul that I do not live, but I exist. I am waiting for an answer from you.