The volunteer movement in Russia is gaining strength and developing, but at the same time it has deep historical roots. 2018 was the year of volunteers and volunteers in Russia. This activity is acquiring various directions, covering more and more needy people.

Social volunteering - orphanages

One of the areas of volunteer activity is visiting and helping to work with pupils in orphanages. This is a special kind of social activity that is not suitable for everyone. Volunteers' wards in this case receive only basic care - supervision, food. They need love, affection, attention, care. Employees of social institutions do not have enough time and energy for this.

Volunteering has always been associated with mercy, helping the weak and vulnerable members of our society, for example, children who, for some reason, were left without parents. It is pleasant to work with children, but it takes a lot of moral and physical strength. Not everyone is able to constantly see the mental suffering of children.

Features of volunteer work in the orphanage

Every volunteer who wants to work in orphanage, you need to have an idea of ​​\u200b\u200bwhat awaits him. Children from social institutions will be significantly different from their peers from ordinary families.

Difficulties you may encounter:

• lagging intellectual, psychological, emotional development;
• lack of trust in others;
• self-doubt;
• aggressive behavior towards volunteers;
• desire to manipulate adults;
• theft;
• moral problems - a child from orphanage most of all wants a family, will ask to pick him up. You need to be morally stable in order not to give empty promises, the volunteers themselves should treat such requests in a balanced way.

A volunteer who comes to an orphanage must have stable moral principles. He comes as an older friend, no need to take on other extraneous functions.

Why volunteers are useful

Employees of children's social institutions are responsible for looking after children. development emotional sphere the residual principle goes, volunteers can help here. The child, abandoned by the parents, lives in the hospital for 1 month, then he is transferred to the baby house. He stays there until he is 3 years old. Then he goes to an orphanage, where he lives until the age of 18.

It is important to hold children at the smallest age in your arms. Tactile contact is needed for the formation of the psyche in children, proper development. Infant homes are often understaffed. Children need constant care and it turns out that nannies do not have time to walk with the kids. Volunteers help take babies out for walks, take them for procedures, vaccinations, medical examinations, transport and sort donated items, toys, and hygiene products.

Orphanages in Moscow, St. Petersburg, and many large cities are well provided with everything necessary. Volunteers come to visit the children in order to teach something, broaden their horizons. Valuable for children from social institutions are practical knowledge that will be useful to them in adulthood. In an ordinary family, parents teach such skills. Volunteers can help children from orphanages.

Children from the orphanage often confuse which food is stored in the refrigerator and which is in the cupboard, because the food is laid out for them by the cooks in the kitchen. Lack of basic household skills leads to great stress. Watching movies together, listening to music, doing needlework, physical education, sports games - all this helps to gain new skills, forms a taste.

When visiting orphanages, certain rules must be observed. They will help keep a good relationship with pupils of social institutions, to save the volunteers their peace of mind.

Helpful Hints:

• Don't talk about your parents, don't ask about your family. This sore subject should be banned.
• You can not call children orphans, many parents are alive, the children know about it. It is best to address by name.
• Don't make empty promises. It is easier to get used to rejection than to wait and hope that will undermine faith in a person.
• Learn to say the word "no". Pupils know how to achieve relationships, it is difficult for them to refuse. It is important to be able to set limits in communication.
• Do not treat children from social institutions with pity. Such thoughts will surely be embodied in actions, phrases that will hurt pupils painfully and lower their self-esteem.
• You need to be natural, small children still do not understand that something is wrong in their life, because they have not seen anything else.

When deciding to become a volunteer, visit orphanages, you need to calculate your time for regular visits to such institutions. You can come not every week, only 2-3 times a month, but constantly. It is important for children to systematically see a person, wait and meet him. The strength of human relations will allow in adulthood not to get lost, to be able to find friends.

How to become a volunteer

The decision to become a volunteer, to help abandoned children, should be made calmly and carefully. All your capabilities need to be evaluated, because you have to spend time and money on travel.

To become a volunteer, you need to apply to a non-profit organization. There are many of them in Russia, for example, “Change one life”, “Hope”, “Childhood house”, “Volunteers for children”, “The future is now”. You can contact via the Internet. There are forms to fill out on the official website. You need to be prepared that the organizers will need to find out some aspects of the personality of the future volunteer, his motives for engaging in such activities. You can indicate your education, work experience, skills and abilities that will be useful in communicating with pupils.

Volunteers are taken by persons who have reached the age of majority, that is, they can be responsible for their actions. Some organizations sign contracts. It has more psychological than legal significance. A person should be responsible and serious about the chosen case. People in the volunteer organization hope for him, the pupils of the orphanage will be waiting for him.

Volunteer movements often organize meetings for volunteer candidates. At them you can meet with leaders, experienced volunteers, ask questions. If a person is accepted into the ranks of volunteers, he is informed, but he is not immediately allowed to participate in work in serious organizations.

Preliminary work is carried out with new volunteers. They are invited to trainings, briefings. Volunteers should get basic knowledge of psychology, pedagogy, get acquainted with the intricacies of working with orphans. In contact with people, especially with children, there is always the possibility of force majeure situations. You have to get out of them with dignity. It depends on how the volunteer was trained.

Next, the newcomer receives a list of events taking place in the near future. He determines the cases in which he will participate. Volunteers working with children may need medical certificates confirming the absence of certain diseases, such as tuberculosis.

Working for free - an oxymoron, nonsense or modern reality? Today, hundreds of thousands of people in Russia help those in need, save those in trouble, and perform public important work on a voluntary basis. Do you want to join them?

Search by interests

The volunteer movement in Russia has strong roots - from hospices, people's hospitals and collections of assistance to the starving in the Volga region to Timurovites and BAM. However, over the past 20 years, the number of volunteer organizations has increased many times: on the one hand, social tension is growing, on the other more people wants to help selflessly. If you decide to make a difference, where can you turn?

1. Charitable foundations. Official organizations collect money for the treatment of patients with complex and terrible diagnoses, accompany them during treatment, help their wards in hospitals and after discharge.

2. Hospices. Working hands are always needed here - to help clean the wards, take a walk with walking patients, feed the bedridden and carry out hygiene procedures. Master classes, concerts, creative activities with people are welcome. Great endurance and patience are required.

3. Ecologists. Collect and separate waste different types waste (plastic, metal, etc.), organize cleaning in parks, forest parks, natural areas, plant trees and help restore forests. They are fighting with tree cutters, collectors of "Red Book" plants, malicious environmental pollutants.

4. Nursing home. Any help will come in handy - communication with the wards, cleaning, care, care. Caring volunteers collect gifts for the elderly for the New Year, Easter, March 8, organize concerts and performances, enter into correspondence and send postcards to "foster" grandparents.

5. Orphanages. They practice 6 options for assistance - social arrangement of children and teaching them an independent life; gifts, clothes, shoes and equipment from sponsors; "PR" of the child in social networks with the aim of a speedy recovery; assistance to children with disabilities; additional education; correspondence and virtual custody of orphans.

6. Help for the homeless. Work for the strong in spirit and body. Volunteers prepare and distribute food for the homeless, tidy up donated clothes, and provide medical and sanitary assistance. Actual legal support, assistance in the restoration of documents.

7. Animal welfare and animal shelters. The main concern of animal rights activists is the trapping and sterilization of stray animals, providing them with veterinary care and accommodation in good hands. The shelters need volunteers to care for animals, feed and communicate with them, raise funds for the maintenance of institutions.

8. Volunteer firefighters. Teams of volunteers spend months day and night in the forests, in fire-dangerous zones. They patrol the area, identify the sources of potential forest fires, and put out the flames on their own with the help of equipment bought with donations.

9. "Lisa Alert". Search teams combing the area and checking basements, abandoned construction sites, dense forests, etc. in the hope of finding missing, lost and otherwise uncommunicative children and adults.

10. Festival volunteers. Cheerful and positive volunteers involved in the preparation and holding of various, more or less informal open-airs. The work required is varied - from construction and security to design and cooking.

11. Helping women in crisis situations. Assistance centers for women who have suffered from sexual and domestic violence, shelters and homes for pregnant women and young mothers who find themselves in a difficult situation.

12. Help at the temple. Work in the church, maintenance of the premises, participation in the choir. Caring for the elderly, sick and infirm parishioners, work with youth, help large families, collection of donations.

How to become a volunteer?

Use the search on the Internet, buy a couple of newspapers, walk around the neighborhood and choose the option that you like best: help people, nature or animals, old people or children, healthy or sick. You can start from the portal Volunteer is a single coordination service volunteers . Then go to the nearest thematic organization- just call or come and ask how you can help. Do not expect special gratitude or delight, it is unlikely that someone will appreciate your efforts, say “thank you” and give you the key to paradise. It will be hard, tiring, maybe even dirty. But you will be warmed by the understanding that you are making the world a little better.

"Give Life" - help for children with oncohematological and other serious diseases

"Live" - ​​help for children with oncohematological diseases.

"Rusfond" - assistance to seriously ill children.

Life Line is the rescue of seriously ill children and the formation of a culture of charity in society.

Vera is helping hospices.

"Best Friends" - helps people with developmental and intellectual disabilities to meet and make friends with their peers.

Naked Heart is a fund to help families raising children with special needs.

"Old age is joy" - the fund helps older people living in nursing homes.

Givers of Hope is an international animal charity.

The Crisis Center for Women and Children was created for underage mothers, women who have experienced domestic violence, as well as women who are in a state of divorce and after a divorce situation, women with disabilities or with disabled children, single mothers with minor children.

"Volunteers of Victory" - assistance to Veterans of the Great Patriotic War.

"Volunteers-medics" - assistance to the medical staff of hospitals, career guidance for schoolchildren, educational programs.

Volunteer Club is an interregional public organization of like-minded people united by the desire to support orphans and children in difficult life situations.

Nika Batchen

There are volunteer organizations that do not work with volunteers at all. Throw a cry - "tomorrow we're going to the orphanage, going to 7 am at the gas station." And now some people are going somewhere... No, guys, the visit of volunteers to a children's social institution is not an easy task, it requires certain knowledge and preparation. So, how to organize a trip in such a way as to bring maximum benefit to the wards?

Officially

The orphanage is a secure facility. Before you come here, you need to build a certain relationship with its administration. She is the power here and she is responsible for the children. And when volunteers are declared without documents, without an agreement, when no organization stands behind them, then in this case the director lets you in at his own risk and bears responsibility for you. And if, God forbid, something happens, for example, a child ran to a master class and fell, it is still connected with your arrival, albeit indirectly. Therefore, when you build relationships with an orphanage, it is better to do it on an official basis and sign a bilateral cooperation agreement. Otherwise, there is no guarantee that you will, in principle, be allowed to see children.

Regularly

A one-time trip won't do anything. Only systematic work will bring benefits to both parties. You set the frequency of trips yourself - once a month, once every three weeks, once every 6 weeks. And if you are going to go to an orphanage, you should ask yourself: are you ready to come back in a month? How much is enough for you? Are you ready to recruit volunteers? Because if 10 people came for the first time, after a month there were five of you, and then two at all - this is bad. If this happens, then you are doing something wrong. In addition to working directly with children, the volunteer group should carry out infrastructural work to attract new volunteers. People may change, but the presence of volunteers must be visible, communication and learning must not be interrupted.

Not too often

The question of frequency of visits is very important. When you drive every week, the kids stop expecting you. They get used to and no longer treat you as something important and bright in their lives. And they should wait for you, should prepare for the meeting and sit diligently at your master classes. Traveling rarely is also not very good - you will be forgotten, you will have to reacquaint yourself and establish contact.

Large groups

If there are 100 people in the orphanage, then at least 20 volunteers should come. It is better to cancel the trip if there are fewer people than necessary. There should be enough volunteers to cover everything planned, to come to children of different ages, to engage everyone in useful and interesting work, to pay attention to everyone so that there is no unhealthy mood in the children's team, that they came to the kids, but not to teenagers.

With a photographer

You need to take a lot of pictures and high quality. These photos are needed not only in order to post them on the website of the volunteer group, although this is also very important and works to attract. A person visits the site, sees a thread on the forum that guys, just like him, are doing an important job. That is, this is not some kind of sect, but normal people. This calms and energizes him.

However, these photographs have another mission. Each of us has a photo album. It was important for us, our parents did it for us. No one but us will create such a photo album for children in a social institution. These albums need to be made and constantly replenished with new pictures.

Prepared

You can't just pack up and go to an orphanage. You must clearly understand where and why you are going and what result you want to get. If you arrive and just hang around, do nothing, don’t bring a master class, don’t know what to talk about with the children, what to play with them, then it’s still too early for you. If you are not ready to perceive the reality of the orphanage without a burning desire to immediately improve everything there and save everyone, then it is still too early for you. If you are mentally and emotionally not too stable and at the same time have a very abstract idea of ​​​​what is happening in the soul and head of a child who is on state support, then it is too early for you. That is why we say that volunteering should be a subject of deep learning. And you, reading this, are on the right track.

The material was prepared by the editors of the website of the School of Social Volunteering based on the speech Ilya Ekushevsky at the seminar “How does the Volunteer Club work and work?”. You can watch the video recording of the seminar.

CHILDREN'S INSTITUTIONS

Historically, our main assistance is addressed to orphans and children left without parental care, in any variation we can. On a permanent basis, we support several thousand children within the walls of orphanages and boarding schools, we carry out financial assistance institutions themselves, as well as visiting children undergoing treatment in medical institutions. Today, under the patronage of the "Club of Volunteers" there are more than 25 children's institutions, mainly in eight regions of the Central Federal District Russian Federation. The main attention is paid to orphanages and boarding schools in settlements, villages and small towns on the outskirts of the regions, since they are deprived of attention more than similar institutions near regional centers.

Below is a list of childcare facilities. In addition to general information about the institution, there you can find a list of acute needs of orphanages and boarding schools, the wishes and requests of children brought up in them, as well as the needs of graduates of children's institutions.

	State Treasury general educational institution Vladimir region "Special (correctional) boarding school in Kolchugino"
	About 160 children study and live at the school, some of them are children left without parents, the rest are children with developmental disabilities. The boarding school is very clean and spacious, there is where to run during breaks!
	Updated list of needs of children from the Kolchuginsky boarding school
	State public institution of the Vladimir region for orphans and children left without parental care, "Pokrovsky orphanage"
	A truly family atmosphere reigns in the Pokrovsky orphanage, the older children help the little ones, and the house itself is homely. About 35 children live here, and the institution is run by a kind and sympathetic director.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Pokrovsky orphanage

	State budgetary institution of the Kaluga region "Nagornovsky psycho-neurological boarding school"
	About 160 wards live in the boarding school and all of them are looking forward to our arrival. The children really need our support and attention.
	An updated list of needs of wards from the Nagornovsky psycho-neurological boarding school
	State institution of the Kaluga region "Polotnyano-Zavodskoy orphanage-boarding school for mentally retarded children"
	One of the oldest institutions under the patronage of the organization. About 150 children with special needs live here. All of them need attention and friendship with volunteers.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Polotnyano-Zavodsky boarding school

	State budgetary institution of Moscow "Psycho-neurological boarding school No. 20"
	The only institution in Moscow visited by volunteers. Hikes run on a weekly basis. Volunteers help people with disabilities and people who have partially or completely lost the ability to self-service.
	An updated list of needs of wards from the Psychoneurological Boarding School No. 20
	State public educational institution of the Moscow region for orphans and children left without parental care, with disabilities "Doverie", Almazovo
	The main feature of this school near Moscow is the boys! Only male children are brought up in the institution. They are very fond of excursions to the capital, moving relay races and playing football.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Almazov school
	State public institution of social services of the Moscow region "Chekhov social and rehabilitation center for minors "Aistenok"
	Children are in this center. different ages. They go to a regular school, and in the summer they go to children's camp. The institution needs volunteers to organize excursions, leisure activities, landscaping and communication with children.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Chekhov Center

	Regional state budgetary educational institution "Kostinsky boarding school for orphans and children left without parental care"
	The Volunteer Club has been supporting this boarding school in the village of Kostino for more than six years. Got along with the children friendly relations. Children look forward to every visit of volunteers, and in moments of separation they write letters to each other.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Kostin boarding school
	Regional state budgetary educational institution "Rybnov boarding school for orphans and children left without parental care"
	About 110 children live and study in this institution. School building with spacious classrooms, a sports and assembly hall, a library, a carpentry, locksmith and sewing workshop. In winter, the ice rink is flooded, and the school has a hockey team.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Rybnovskaya boarding school

	Smolensk Regional State Budgetary Educational Institution for orphans and children left without parental care "Safonovsky children's home-school"
	The first institution in the history of the Club of Volunteers, trips to which laid the foundation for the development of a volunteer organization. More than 110 children live and study here. At one time, Yuri Gagarin attended this school.
	An updated list of needs of children from the Safonov Orphanage-School
	Smolensk Regional State Budgetary Institution "Roslavl Social and Rehabilitation Center for Minors" Teremok "
	Teremok is located 360 km from Moscow and is one of the most remote institutions visited by volunteers. Most often, trips take place by bus, and not by volunteers' personal cars.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Social and Rehabilitation Center

	State government institution for orphans and children left without parental care, "Zubtsovsky Orphanage"
	One day, volunteers brought and gave the children several new bicycles. Fun assembly of bikes from boxes, first attempts at riding, rules traffic It was an unforgettable and emotional day!
	Updated list of needs of children from the Zubtsovsky orphanage
	State public educational institution for orphans and children left without parental care, "Torzhok boarding school"
	The village of Zeleny, where the school is located, is located 30 km from the city of Torzhok. About 50 children live and study here. They love skiing and the winter season.
	An updated list of needs of children from the Torzhok boarding school
	State public educational institution for orphans and children left without parental care, "Emmaus boarding school"
	The Volunteer Club has supported this school in Emmauss for over seven years. The warmest friendships have developed with the children. Volunteers also do not leave and support graduates.
	Updated list of needs of children from Emmaus boarding school

	State educational institution of the Tula region "Bolokhov school for students with disabilities"
	Children in this school are very open and interested, they are happy to meet all the master classes conducted by volunteers. And we, for our part, are trying, together with the administration, to improve the material base of the institution.
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Barsukovskaya school. A.M. Garanina"
	Volunteers are always welcome at the Barsukovskaya school, both for adults and children. And here the guys are very fond of hiking and singing songs with a guitar!
	Updated list of needs of children from the Bolokhov school
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Don School No. 1"
	About 80 children are brought up in this institution. Among them there are both orphans and domestic children from large and low-income families.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Don school
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Dubovskaya school for students with disabilities"
	At the school, located about 230 km from Moscow, the arrivals of volunteers are always eagerly awaited. Girls attend a sewing club, and boys master construction professions.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Dubovskaya school
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Efremov school for students with disabilities"
	The institution is located at a distance of 320 km from Moscow. The atmosphere in the house is always very cozy: the administration welcomes the volunteers with hot buns, and the children are very friendly with each other and are always ready to help both the volunteers and each other.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Efremov school
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Novogurovsk school for students with disabilities"
	The institution has been patronized by the "Club of Volunteers" since 2009, and many graduates still maintain contact and warm friendly relations with volunteers.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Novogurovsk school
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Novomoskovsk school for students with disabilities"
	Initially, this boarding school, 220 km from Moscow, was created for children who lost their parents during the Great Patriotic War. Today, about 200 inquisitive and talented children are brought up in the institution.
	Updated list of needs of children from Novomoskovsk boarding school No. 1
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Novomoskovsk regional center of education"
	The guys traditionally beat volunteers in football and amaze with their culinary masterpieces. Volunteers often visit graduates, and this year they organized a bright and eventful excursion to Moscow for them.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Novomoskovsk Education Center
	State educational institution of the Tula region "Suvorov school for students with disabilities"
	This is one of the largest institutions we supervise in terms of the number of children, some of whom were transferred from those boarding schools where volunteers used to go.
	Updated list of needs of children from the Suvorov School
	State institution of the Tula region "Social rehabilitation center for minors No. 1"
	Children get to this Center immediately after they are taken away from their “unfortunate parents”, who are soon deprived of parental rights. Volunteers try to support children at a difficult moment for them.
	Updated list of needs of children from the SRC in Tula

Assistance is also provided periodically, or was previously provided by the "Club of Volunteers" in the following institutions:
— Taldomsky orphanage (Moscow region)
— Nadezhda Family Development Center (Moscow Region)
— Starooskolsky orphanage (Belgorod region)
— Suzdal orphanage No. 5 (Vladimir region)
— Obninsk boarding school (Kaluga region)
— Lebyazhenskaya boarding school (Kurgan region)
– Circus profile boarding school No. 15 (Moscow)
– Special boarding school No. 80 (Moscow)
— Serpukhov orphanage (Moscow region)
— Serpukhov boarding school (Moscow region)
— Malakhovskiy orphanage "Sonata" (Moscow region)
— Novoitkulsky orphanage (Novosibirsk region)
— Specialized orphanage (Oryol region)
— Toropetsk boarding school (Tver region)
— Nelidov boarding school (Tver region)
— Bezhetsk boarding school (Tver region)
— Aleksinsky orphanage (Tula region)
— Ievlev boarding school (Tula region)
— Obidim boarding school (Tula region)
– Chekalinsky nursing home (Tula region)
— Pereslavl-Zalessky orphanage (Yaroslavl region)
– Severo-Ageevskaya boarding school (Tula region)
– Barsukovskaya boarding school (Tula region)

Because soon New Year, and many will want to polish their karma by showering gifts on completely unfamiliar children in the nearest orphanage, I decided to show you one important text. I warn you right away: the text tells why this is not possible. And the point is not at all in ethical considerations (although they are also in them), but in specific harm. But enough spoilers! Now you will find out for yourself.

Since I am not an expert in helping children, a professional will tell you about the problem. A few years ago, the magazine "Takie Dela" published an excellent article that explains why emergency gifts for children in orphanages are harmful. Unfortunately, over these few years the situation in Russia has hardly changed.

A word to Anna Puchkova, an expert in the field of charity, volunteering and corporate social responsibility:

“No gifts to orphanages. Yes, I don’t mean at all: “Guys, urgently help, this year we don’t have enough gifts for the unfortunate disadvantaged kids in orphanages,” I mean exactly: “Please, stop bullying over children from orphanages, showering them with gifts.

I understand that the text of this article will be very painful to read for about half of those who are going to do this (be strong, positive at the end). And the other half will silently and sadly nod and say: “Yes, I also talk about this all the time, but that doesn’t stop anyone.” I know that the first article will cause frustration or even aggression. Therefore, I want to say right away: “Yes, I also really love children and people in general”, “Yes, I myself also do something to help others, namely, I devote about 95% of my time to this, not counting sleep”, “Yes , at one time I visited a huge number of orphanages and even lived in one for a week, right in a group with children”, “Yes, I deal with volunteers from more than 20 regions of the country, and everywhere there is exactly the same as in Moscow” . So guys, instead of being frustrated, let's just try to make our help at least a little more effective, that's what we all want, right?

So, why is it still impossible to give gifts to orphanages, and what can be done instead?

Take, for example, an ideal situation, that is, a situation in which all children got the same gifts, all equally, an ideal situation that excludes the possibility that the gifts did not reach the children. A situation in which a teenager did not sell a gift to buy cigarettes or beer. Or when the gift wasn't used to make someone jealous or simply show superiority ("look what I have, you don't"), usually after that the gift is either broken or stolen as soon as the owner has distracted himself from it, and, of course, this is very bad both for the owner and for the one who broke or stole.

So, even in this ideal situation (and you understand that this does not happen?), giving gifts to orphanages, boarding schools, social shelters and other forms of state orphanages (I emphasize - especially state ones) is destructive for the child's psyche , because according to statistics over time new year holidays a child from an orphanage attends about 17 Christmas trees and events and receives about 19 gifts (in the Moscow region - 25). Do you understand that this is just a survival marathon? Do you want to be the 26th who came running frantically to love a child you did not know yesterday? What about 18s? The saddest thing is that...

In the next month and a half, billions of rubles will be spent on toys, teddy bears, sleds, Barbies and even tablets, phones and iPods (yes, many children ask for exactly this, and many adults buy it for them, although they themselves guess that there is something it's not)

All this is monstrous because it brings up a terrible dependency, the child gets used to the fact that they give him something all the time, give, perform, and without any effort or visible reasons for him. Some exalted people constantly come who frantically try to love them all to death in half a day and move on (I know, because I myself was exactly the same). And then suddenly the child turns 18, and ... And nothing, no one goes to him, no one showers him with gifts, no one cares about the problems of "an adult healthy guy who has to go to work." Why should he? You only taught him to beg, you didn't teach him to earn. You taught him to accept gifts and amusements and thought that he should somehow guess about work. As a result, only 10% cope with this state of affairs, while the rest become drunkards, get into crime and prisons, and commit suicide. Think about it! 10%! 90%!

Children in orphanages (and I mean in this case all state views institutions of this type) live according to the rules of a gloomy, inhuman and merciless system created at the beginning of the 20th century. Their pupils are not considered part of society, and therefore they do not become one. They are considered poor and unfortunate, miserable and deprived, and only truly sincere and professional charitable foundations struggling with their socialization, trying to give them back the motivation to live, strive for something and achieve their goals, fill them with faith in their own strength and arrange them in families.

“Well, everyone helps as best they can,” they often answer me offendedly at the mention of professional funds. No, no, I'm not at all against a little help, and I know for sure that EVERYONE can help. But this is not about helping. I am writing all this precisely in order to explain - gifts to orphanages for the holidays and without them, as well as a bunch of fun activities for the holidays - this is not help, this is harm.

I will give an example from my own practice, when many years ago I came as part of a group of volunteers to one of the orphanages in the Tver region. We agreed on a visit in advance, prepared competitions and performances, clarified with the director that there would be no one except us that day. When we arrived, another group of volunteers left right in front of us, and the children, stretching, left the assembly hall with gifts. They hoped to go about their business, but the director told them to urgently go back to the hall, because "sponsors arrived", and the children wandered off to watch our next songs and dances, which they absolutely did not need. What benefit did we bring them by forcing them to sit in the assembly hall for half a day? What benefits can be brought by a master class on weaving baubles and soap making?

Well, what then to do and how to help, if there is such a desire?

I promised a positive at the end, and here it is - you may not only be needed, but very needed! For example, if you want to have a truly festive event, then organize it for children with disabilities. And try to take them somewhere out of the house, in our country they are so rarely given such an opportunity. And even better - consult with specialized funds and organize a joint event for ordinary children and children with disabilities. This will be very helpful for both.

If you definitely want to give someone a gift, that is, children with cancer, there are children from low-income families, and just those who are on long-term treatment in the hospital, you definitely won’t spoil them. There are also elderly people, people in hospices and hospitals, paralyzed people, prisoners (everyone forgets about them) - they will all be happy with your warmth and attention, they will need your gifts and will be gratefully accepted.

Well, if you want to do something specifically for children from orphanages, then my advice to you is to donate money or become a volunteer in one of the funds that really change their lives and save them:

"Change One Life"- they find a father and mother for children, and there is nothing more precious than this gift.

One of the oldest and most professional foundations dealing with the socialization of orphans.

"Volunteers to help orphans"- they strive to keep as many children as possible in the family and prevent them from falling into orphanages, and also take care of the smallest refuseniks from zero to four years old.

"Big change"- systematic tutoring and development of orphans, they help them enter universities, find themselves in life, gain independence and independence.

With the money that is spent annually on teddy bears for children living in concentration camps, these funds can really save them, get them out of there, protect them, take care of them.

Everything that I have described in this article is far from new, and any expert in the field of philanthropy will tell you exactly the same thing. Many companies and just kind people have already understood this and are beginning to abandon the system of giving gifts and entertainment to orphanages, and this cannot but rejoice.

Nevertheless, finishing the article, I also sadly look into the eyes of its readers, because most of them will agree with it closer to the beginning of the new year, when they return from orphanages, leaving another dose of gifts there ... "