Tears are a common reaction to some sad event; increased tearfulness is a symptom of mental or physical exhaustion. In the differential diagnosis, it is necessary to exclude brain diseases:

• multiple sclerosis,
• bulbar palsy,
• cerebral atherosclerosis.

In any case, a neurological examination is necessary. As a rule, in this case, along with drug therapy, psychotherapy is prescribed.

Treatment of tearfulness

To get rid of increased tearfulness, you need to radically change your lifestyle. Of course, this will take a lot of time. Start small - bring more positivity into your life. Surround yourself with bright colors: decorate the window with colored curtains, hang it on the wall beautiful pictures, buy brighter clothes.

Stop watching the news at night

For the most part, they only carry negativity, upsetting and escalating the situation even more. Watch only good films.

Don't forget about rest

Be sure to please yourself with sweets, give yourself gifts, and at least occasionally allow yourself what you want for your soul and body. If you love skating, love going to the theater, or enjoy dancing, then you have the opportunity to get rid of overwhelming emotions and forget about troubles. A hobby brings color to life and distracts from the daily routine.

Take care of your health

Let proper nutrition, daily sports and healthy sleep will become familiar to you. Within a month or two you will see significant changes. It’s not for nothing that they say: “In healthy body healthy mind."

Tearfulness in children

Children's excitability, tearfulness and emotionality are much higher than the same qualities in adults. And this is normal, since the child’s psyche is still unstable. If you notice that a child cries too often and a lot (at least compared to his peers), then there may be several reasons.

First of all, we can talk about the temperament or individual characteristics of the child’s nervous system. People with weak nervous system and in adulthood they are characterized by increased sensitivity, vulnerability and a tendency to melancholy.

A common mistake parents make is that they try to overcome the tearfulness of such a melancholic child, urging him not to cry and even sometimes making fun of tears, especially if we're talking about about the boy. In fact, such upbringing results in the fact that the child’s self-doubt and self-rejection are added to the natural tearfulness.

Over time, the child’s psyche strengthens, self-control develops, and he will cry less and less. However, it is useful when communicating with a child to consciously focus his attention on good sides life, gently switch it from the negative, not allowing you to “get hung up” on the bad for a long time.

If a child’s tearfulness manifests itself unexpectedly, then the cause should first of all be sought in the presence of some kind of chronic stress. Adaptation to kindergarten or school, parental divorce or conflicts in the family, problems in relationships with peers - all these factors weaken the child’s nervous system, making him excitable.

Often a child becomes whiny during age crises (one year, three and seven years). Once the crisis period is overcome, such tearfulness usually goes away on its own.

Separately, it is worth mentioning the more serious causes of children's tearfulness. For example, we are talking about childhood depression or experiences of violence. If you notice that your child has suddenly become very whiny, tense, at the same time his interest in life has decreased and he has stopped engaging in hobbies, communication with family and friends has decreased, nervous tics, nightmares and other serious symptoms have appeared, it makes sense to contact child psychologist for detailed diagnostics emotional state child.

Questions and answers on the topic "Tearfulness"

Question:IN Lately I began to notice that I had turned into a real crybaby. For example, I can perfectly understand that a broken knee or a minor squabble with someone I know is not worth worrying too much about, but for some reason I still start crying. That is, I understand that it’s not worth it, that all these are trifles and that similar incidents have happened to me dozens of times already, but I still continue to cry. Why is this happening to me? Maybe it's because I'm too impressionable and emotional? Or do I have weak nerves? How to deal with this? Maybe I should take an anxiety test?

Answer: Yes, this may be a consequence of neurosis or hormonal changes in the body. Check with an endocrinologist, this condition is often caused by the thyroid gland. Neurosis that arises against the background of stressful situations (usually protracted) is also not a gift. Well, and finally, critical age (either adolescence or menopause). In any case, peony tincture will help you (take according to instructions), cold and hot shower, and if there is a feeling of a lump in the throat, the homeopathic remedy ignation is good. But you still need to check your thyroid gland.

Question:Good afternoon. There is no more strength left. I constantly feel tired, and not just tired, but exhausted to the limit. From morning until evening. I feel sick all the time, I have no appetite, I try to cook something tasty, but there is no pleasure from eating (My head is spinning and I feel like crying all the time from helplessness, but I don’t even have the strength to cry.

Answer: Natalya, you have severe astheno-neurotic depressive syndrome. Consultation with a psychologist is mandatory.

Question:My father had a second stroke, now after resuscitation he is already in the ward, when we visit, he cries very often, this didn’t happen before after 1 stroke, will it go away?

Answer: This is a consequence of a brain damaged after a stroke. As old-school neurologists say, “it’s the right hemisphere that’s crying.” There are “non-normative” states - unjustified cheerfulness - euphoria, increased tearfulness, aggressiveness, negativism. It should pass, the brain will compensate. But it all depends on the location of the lesion, the area of ​​the lesion and the compensatory capabilities of the brain.

Question:Hello, I am interested in the following question. Lately, I constantly want to cry over trifles: I see a commercial with small children, animals, in which there is nothing sad at all. I could cry over this film from beginning to end. It started not so long ago, a few months ago. I have never been mentally unstable; there are no serious problems or stress in my life.

Answer: Your tearfulness is a sign that you need to get married and have children. Congratulations - it looks like you are ripe for marriage and Serious relationships. Perhaps, subconsciously, when you watch touching films and cute animals and children, you think that you could already have such small children or your own home with such animals - and a husband into the bargain. You reported so briskly about the absence of serious stress that I began to doubt it. Tearfulness from time to time is normal: our tear glands should be cleansed from time to time and remove harmful toxins from the body. In addition, tears relieve stress and tension from internal dissatisfaction. This is a sign of mature emotionality.

Question:The child is 10 years old. Since childhood I was whiny, they thought he would outgrow it, but with age it got worse. Cries both from pain and resentment. We live with our grandmother, she takes full care of him, fussing with him like a little one, he is also very slow, we argue about this, but she does not want to understand us. He has no friends at school, he only communicates with girls. I convince him that this is not possible, everyone laughs, but in my opinion he is not particularly ashamed of his tearfulness. He doesn’t want to go anywhere, only computers are on his mind.

Answer: A child's slowness may be a consequence of his physiological characteristics. By scolding him, you will not change his nature in any way, but you will contribute to the formation of low self-esteem and self-doubt, which apparently has already happened. By continuing to take care of him like a baby, you do not give him a chance to grow up and learn to cope with the situations he finds himself in in life on his own, this causes his reluctance to go anywhere, and the need for communication is realized with the help of a computer. His tearfulness and touchiness are a sure signal that you need to change your position towards the child. I think that both your son and you need in-person help from a psychologist.

When a baby cries, parents often feel confused and don't know how to respond. Frequent tears of a child can cause both a feeling of complete powerlessness and despair, as well as outbursts of aggression and irritation. Is frequent tearfulness an indicator of any deviation in the child’s behavior and how to understand why a child is crying, and most importantly, what to do about it?

Why do children often cry?

Even from birth, crying for a child is a reaction to external stimuli and a way to attract the attention of adults. By crying, the newborn communicates to the mother that he has a wet diaper or that he is hungry. As the child develops, he also expresses emotional reactions through tears. Even a minor reason can cause a whole storm of emotions in a child. In fact, such sensitivity is absolutely normal for a child. Children's nervous system is still weak, so they do not yet know how to control their behavior as well as adults.

In the process of children's development, so-called age-related crises arise. Child psychologists identify several crisis periods:

Newborn crisis.
. Crisis of one year.
. Crisis of three years.
. Crisis of seven years.
. Teenage crisis.

Childhood age crises are not a disease, but simply a period of transition of a child from one stage of development to another. If a child successfully overcomes a crisis, he will reach a qualitatively new level of development, consolidate his skills and gain experience. During age-related crises, children may become more capricious and whiny. Parents should be patient with their child and provide him with support and assistance.

Excessive tearfulness can also be caused by the child's temperament. Temperament is an innate set of psychophysiological qualities of a person. No bad or good types It’s just that this is a feature of a person with its pros and cons. There are four main types of temperament: choleric, sanguine, phlegmatic and melancholic. Choleric people have a strong nervous system, are unbalanced and mobile. Sanguine people - with a strong nervous system, balanced and mobile. Phlegmatic people are strong, balanced, inert and sedentary. Melancholic people have a weak nervous system with imbalance and poor mobility. At the same time, there are no people with a pure manifestation of only one type of temperament. Usually they talk about the predominance of one of them. If a child has a predominant type of choleric or melancholic, then one should expect that he will cry more often. Children with a weak nervous system are very susceptible and vulnerable; they experience emotions deeply and for a long time.

How to behave?

If parents notice that a child is prone to melancholy, it is necessary to praise him more often, increase self-esteem, and encourage him in every possible way. Under no circumstances should you shame a child or make fun of his tears. Sports activities are beneficial for all children, and they will also help strengthen not only the body, but also the spirit. If a child is very excitable, he cries often and his sleep is disturbed, then it is better to create the most calm and supportive environment for the child. It is undesirable to swear in the presence of a child, shout at him, especially punish him for excessive expression of emotions.

The peculiarity of children is that they can very quickly forget about the cause of their disorder and within a few minutes they can laugh loudly at a joke. Parents can use this to switch their baby from negative emotions to positive ones. Mom can try to make him laugh by shifting the emphasis to the good aspects of life. By showing love to the child, the mother helps him feel calmer and more confident.

Children - good psychologists, they are sensitive to mood changes in adults. If a child understands that with the help of tears he can easily achieve his goal, then he will actively use this. Parents should pay attention to this and not allow their child to manipulate them. If your child becomes hysterical, you need to maintain a calm and confident attitude. The child must understand that he will not achieve anything with tears and hysterics. He needs to explain why he can't get what he wants. It is important to teach your child to achieve his goals in other ways and to be able to make compromises.

Reveal real reasons, for which the child often cries, is an important task for any parent. Sometimes, frequent crying can signal the presence of some kind of stress that has happened to the child. If such emotionality is usually not characteristic of a child, he begins to suffer from nightmares, and has lost interest in his favorite activities, then we must fight not with the manifestation of tearfulness, but with overcoming the consequences of prolonged stress. In advanced cases, a good child psychologist may be needed.

Perhaps, with frequent tears, the child is trying to attract the attention of mom or dad if he lacks love and affection. If parents are very busy working or caring for younger children, the child may become bored and feel abandoned. You should try to set aside time to show your baby your love with affectionate words and hugs.

You cannot do without conflict and stressful situations in life, and a child’s tears are his path to independence. Parents must teach their child to experience difficult moments and cope with them. Mom and dad need to be tolerant of the child and remember that as he grows up and improves his nervous system, he will learn to control his emotions.

In any case, a neurological examination is necessary. As a rule, in this case, along with drug therapy, psychotherapy is prescribed.

Treatment of tearfulness

To get rid of increased tearfulness, you need to radically change your lifestyle. Of course, this will take a lot of time. Start small - bring more positivity into your life. Surround yourself with bright colors: decorate the window with colored curtains, hang beautiful paintings on the wall, buy brighter clothes. Stop watching the news at night. For the most part, they only carry negativity, upsetting and escalating the situation even more. Watch only good films. Don't forget about rest. Be sure to please yourself with sweets, give yourself gifts, and at least occasionally allow yourself what you want for your soul and body. If you love skating, love going to the theater, or enjoy dancing, then you have the opportunity to get rid of overwhelming emotions and forget about troubles. A hobby brings color to life and distracts from the daily routine. Take care of your health. Let proper nutrition, daily exercise and healthy sleep become habitual for you. Within a month or two you will see significant changes. It’s not for nothing that they say: “A healthy mind in a healthy body.”

Tearfulness in children

Children's excitability, tearfulness and emotionality are much higher than the same qualities in adults. And this is normal, since the child’s psyche is still unstable. If you notice that a child cries too often and a lot (at least compared to his peers), then there may be several reasons. First of all, we can talk about the temperament or individual characteristics of the child’s nervous system. People with a weak nervous system and in adulthood are characterized by increased sensitivity, vulnerability and a tendency to melancholy. A common mistake parents make is that they try to overcome the tearfulness of such a melancholic child, urging him not to cry and even sometimes ridiculing his tears, especially if we are talking about a boy. In fact, such upbringing results in the fact that the child’s self-doubt and self-rejection are added to the natural tearfulness.

Over time, the child’s psyche strengthens, self-control develops, and he will cry less and less. However, when communicating with a child, it is useful to consciously focus his attention on the good aspects of life, gently switch him from the negative, without allowing him to “get hung up” on the bad for a long time. If a child’s tearfulness manifests itself unexpectedly, then the cause should first of all be sought in the presence of some kind of chronic stress. Adaptation to kindergarten or school, parental divorce or conflicts in the family, problems in relationships with peers - all these factors weaken the child’s nervous system, making him excitable. Often a child becomes whiny during age crises (one year, three and seven years). Once the crisis period is overcome, such tearfulness usually goes away on its own.

Questions and answers on the topic “Tearfulness”

Question: Lately I've started to notice that I've turned into a real crybaby. For example, I can perfectly understand that a broken knee or a minor squabble with someone I know is not worth worrying too much about, but for some reason I still start crying. That is, I understand that it’s not worth it, that all these are trifles and that similar incidents have happened to me dozens of times already, but I still continue to cry. Why is this happening to me? Maybe it's because I'm too impressionable and emotional? Or do I have weak nerves? How to deal with this? Maybe I should take an anxiety test?

Question: Good afternoon. There is no more strength left. I constantly feel tired, and not just tired, but exhausted to the limit. From morning until evening. I feel sick all the time, I have no appetite, I try to cook something tasty, but there is no pleasure from eating (My head is spinning and I feel like crying all the time from helplessness, but I don’t even have the strength to cry.

Question: My father had a second stroke, now after resuscitation he is already in the ward, when we visit, he cries very often, this didn’t happen before after 1 stroke, will it go away?

Question: Hello, I am interested in the following question. Lately, I constantly want to cry over trifles: I see a commercial with small children, animals, in which there is nothing sad at all. I could cry over this film from beginning to end. It started not so long ago, a few months ago. I have never been mentally unstable; there are no serious problems or stress in my life.

Question: The child is 10 years old. Since childhood I was whiny, they thought he would outgrow it, but with age it got worse. Cries both from pain and resentment. We live with our grandmother, she takes full care of him, fussing with him like a little one, he is also very slow, we argue about this, but she does not want to understand us. He has no friends at school, he only communicates with girls. I convince him that this is not possible, everyone laughs, but in my opinion he is not particularly ashamed of his tearfulness. He doesn’t want to go anywhere, only computers are on his mind.

Tearfulness in children: main causes and treatment of pathology

Most of us have forgotten what it's like to be a child. Parents look down on their children, not understanding why they often cry. Tears are absolutely normal reaction for various sad or joyful events. Excessive tearfulness is an emotional state, a sign of mental or physical weakening. If parents periodically observe this condition in their child, they should consult a doctor. The doctor will refer you for examination and, based on the results, prescribe treatment.

Causes of increased tearfulness

In fact, there are many reasons for increased tearfulness. List of the most common reasons:

1. Newborns cry because they are hungry, want to be held by their mother, because they want to sleep or because they feel discomfort.
2. In the 2nd month of life, the baby cries before going to bed - this is a kind of emotional release that has accumulated during the day. Over time this will pass.

In addition, the causes of excessive tearfulness may be depression or experience of violence. Monitor your child and contact your doctor if he or she exhibits the following signs:

• lost interest in life
• having nightmares
• became tense, nervous tics and other alarming signs appeared

First of all, identify the cause of this condition. Take a closer look at your child's behavior in different situations. If he becomes capricious as soon as you forbid something, he is thereby trying to manipulate you in order to get his way no matter what. This behavior should not be encouraged, otherwise it will be much more difficult to cope with it in the future. If tearfulness does not go away over time, you should consult a doctor.

Treatment of tearfulness in children

Your child will completely get rid of tearfulness when the environment around him changes. You will have to give up a number of things and put away some toys. Parents should be patient, because this process will take more than one or two days. This will take a huge amount of time, but the main thing here is the result.

Bright details in the nursery

An excellent impetus for a change in mood will be the appearance of bright colors in your child’s life. Start by renovating your child's room, create for him new world, which is full of positive emotions.

Remove the TV from the children's room, because it has a negative impact on the child, especially if he watches it at night.

Periodically visit amusement parks, museums and theaters with your child, thereby giving your child the opportunity to relax.

Together with your child, do exercises in the morning and play sports. Children love to be proud of their parents.

It is also necessary to include as many fruits and vegetables in the diet as possible, and exclude those foods that are not beneficial or harmful.

Treatment of depression

This condition should be treated by a specialist: namely, a pediatrician or a psychiatrist. Only one of them, having correctly assessed the situation, can prescribe drug therapy.

Typically, antidepressants are used to treat this condition:

They have a calming effect on the body. Medications combat obsessive thoughts and panic attacks. These drugs cause virtually no side effects.

Depression in children of different age groups is also treated with cognitive behavioral therapy. It combines a change in thinking and correction of behavior. This therapy helps the child fight psychological problems and negative emotions, as a result of which the child adapts more easily to society.

Among the tasks of individual psychotherapy is preparing the child school age correctly express your emotions, talk about fears, traumas and overcome such difficulties.

If quarrels or problems with mutual understanding arise very often in the family, parents cannot find common language with a child, only psychotherapy will help with this.

Parental misbehavior

The main mistake of mothers and fathers is that parents try to overcome the child’s excessive tearfulness, demanding that they stop crying, and sometimes ridiculing this state of the child, especially for boys. It is this upbringing that results in the child subsequently becoming unsure of himself and not perceiving himself.

In the future, the child’s psyche will become stronger, self-control will develop, and this condition will occur less and less. But it is very useful when communicating with him to emphasize the best aspects of life, gradually moving away from bad thoughts, not allowing him to stay with them for a long time.

If this condition appears suddenly in a child, then look for the cause in the presence of chronic stress. Getting used to kindergarten or school, quarrels in the family, divorce of parents, problems with other children - all this weakens the child’s psyche, making him emotional.

It is important to catch the exact cause of the child’s excessive tearfulness and deal with it together, and not just fight with tears.

It is worth remembering that this condition often occurs during age-related crises (one year, three years and seven years). Typically, it will go away on its own over time.

What to do if tears are a way of manipulation?

Sometimes excessive tearfulness is not an expression of weakness, fatigue, etc., but only a form of child behavior that turns out to be effective. Observe your child when exactly he starts crying. If tearfulness occurs in a situation where parents prohibit or restrict something, and it gradually turns into hysteria, think about why this method of influence has become an effective method for him to get from moms and dads.

The child does not consciously manipulate tears, but if experience tells him that much can be achieved with their help, then often this method becomes a “weapon.”

It is important to remember about more serious reasons that can lead to such a condition - depression and experienced violence. If you see that your child has suddenly become excessively tearful, has lost the meaning of life, has stopped engaging in hobbies, has stopped communicating with children and loved ones, has nervous tics and nightmares, consult a doctor immediately. Only a doctor can make a diagnosis and prescribe appropriate treatment.

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Constant whims and tearfulness in a 5 year old child

Question

Good afternoon. I don't know where to start, because... I encountered a problem when raising my second child.

A 5-year-old girl, quite emotional: very active with peers who obey her, but she doesn’t like it when there are a lot of children, because... she is afraid that she will be hit or pushed, or hurt. She doesn’t like and doesn’t know how to lose, everything should be as she wants. If something goes wrong, hysteria begins.

Now about the main thing. At home she cries rarely and moderately, because... most often we make concessions, in kindergarten It’s just a disaster, according to the teachers: they say, take the child and raise him at home.

The child cries in all classes: physical education, music, reading, mathematics, modeling, etc., everything that goes on in the garden. At the same time, she cannot be calmed down.

It started about three months ago with certain classes where she was not doing well. Now I have switched to everything, even previously loved ones.

When talking at home, he explains his crying in an accessible way, for example, there was not enough ball, or the dance pair was changed, or he missed a page for a lesson, etc.

We tried to talk and express everything in words, but she couldn’t, because... She can’t hold back her tears, and then she doesn’t hear anything and just cries. Which specialist should I contact and how can I help my child?

Answer

First of all, you need to consult a neurologist; the child may have increased anxiety as a result of the consequences of neurology (high sensitivity of the nervous system), hence possible emotional anxiety and tearfulness. This most often happens in children in spring and autumn.

Secondly, a child may have a delayed crisis of 5 years; it is usually accompanied by unjustified fears, self-doubt, irritability, sudden aggression and hysterics. A child at this age learns to be independent, control his emotions, and wants to be significant. Therefore, it is important for him that everything works out for him. And children often use tears as a weapon against adults, this is also worth paying attention to.

The main thing is for parents to always be there and learn to bypass all the manipulations and tantrums of the child.

You can also pay attention to the type of temperament; according to your description, the melancholic type fits. They are always whiny, afraid of everything, and constantly in an anxious state. Read the recommendations for this temperament.

And lastly, you need to analyze your parenting style and the situation in the family, maybe something has changed recently, children react quickly to everything with their behavior.

You can go to a psychologist for a consultation with your child; there, with the help of a conversation and diagnostics, the psychologist will help your child reach a stable emotional state. All the best!

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A 5.5 year old child has become very whiny

We could freak out and cry because of this. But so that after sleep or for any slightest reason, this does not happen

the weather is like this((I’m getting sick

Does he go to the garden? Mine saw enough there and learned. Now she’s learning to pull herself together and not let herself cry. To do this, he evaluates the reason: is it irreparable or not?

Our dad became furious, he doesn’t like tears, he sees this as manipulation. From there we began to pull ourselves together. Well, at least I started to calm down faster, that’s already progress.

We went to a neurologist, we took glycine and Magnelis... They said age + birth of the youngest... They also prescribed Tenya

Yes, there is jealousy (((

By the age of 5, on the contrary, this crying for no reason went away. I took her to a psychologist, but nothing was revealed. Everything is fine. They didn't take pills.

It may be related to the birth of the baby. Mine also roars, but we are younger. We also pull her back. Try Zerdeika soothing tea for children.

What about tea? I told mine that this is such a magical cell

It was... Just such a sensitive child... it passed by the second grade)))))))))... but he remained just as gentle and attentive.

If there is no allergy, brew herbs in a bath with sea ​​salt... and joint trips, hikes, walks... Find drawings online that psychologists suggest drawing for children. Our problem was with the fighter from the mini-center.

Of course, if you have the opportunity not to drive, don’t drive.

I suffered with my neurology for a long time... after this shitty mini-center, he walked hand in hand with the teacher for the first quarter in the first grade... it’s better, of course, to give it to sports later... well, that’s just me theoretically.

A pillow stuffed with valerian and mint helped me a lot; my mother put it under my pillow when I was a child... my sleep returned to normal right away... Maybe it’s possible to sew a hare of some kind, stuff it with herbs and hang it near the bed? let it hang - it stinks))))))))

You have to try everything, talk yourself into a couple of lessons... usually the trainer gives you a free trial.

But nothing sports has worked for us. Maximum is six months (((... I always scold the city for the fact that there is no type of exercise therapy on a mass scale... or just aerobics... Just to get the kids moving..

That's what really went wrong - this swimming... If we hadn't been sick all winter, including spring, we would have gone again.

we swam in Zhemchuzhina... There was a range of services - exercise therapy + swimming for half an hour + massage + sauna... everything took about an hour and a half. Great treatment! Then I joined the labor reserves. But not for long.

I need to contact them... prices have gone up, I think.

Daughter, same thing! One to one. I can’t do it anymore, and I scold and regret it.

Probably this is how jealousy manifests itself. All the same attention, whatever one may say, has become less with the advent of the baby

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Children's tearfulness. Causes and solutions

Reasons for tears

Children's excitability, tearfulness and emotionality are much higher than the same qualities in adults. And this is normal, since the child’s psyche is still unstable. An insignificant reason for us can become a real tragedy for a child. A child reacts to all the negative moments in his life with the help of tears; tears for him are only an expression of emotions that he has not yet learned to restrain. But children also unexpectedly and quickly have the ability to switch from bad to good, forgetting about tears.

Star stories. Difficult child

Therefore, the first thing that should be advised to parents is to be calmer about children’s tears. How younger child, the more often he expresses his negative emotions through tears.

If you notice that a child cries too often and a lot (at least compared to his peers), then there may be several reasons.

First of all, we can talk about the temperament or individual characteristics of the child’s nervous system. Each of us is naturally given a weak or strong nervous system. People with a weak nervous system and in adulthood are characterized by increased sensitivity, vulnerability and a tendency to melancholy.

In children, these features are more pronounced - from the first days of life, the child was characterized by increased excitability, sleeps poorly and often cries. In addition, you may notice that the child reacts painfully to sad episodes in cartoons, scary fairy tales, and does not tolerate screaming and noise well.

Parents' mistakes

A common mistake parents make is that they try to overcome the tearfulness of such a melancholic child, urging him not to cry and even sometimes ridiculing his tears, especially if we are talking about a boy. In fact, such upbringing results in the fact that the child’s self-doubt and self-rejection are added to the natural tearfulness.

Over time, the child’s psyche strengthens, self-control develops, and he will cry less and less. However, when communicating with a child, it is useful to consciously focus his attention on the good aspects of life, gently switch him from the negative, without allowing him to “get hung up” on the bad for a long time.

If a child’s tearfulness manifests itself unexpectedly, then the cause should first of all be sought in the presence of some kind of chronic stress. Adaptation to kindergarten or school, parental divorce or conflicts in the family, problems in relationships with peers - all these factors weaken the child’s nervous system, making him excitable.

Therefore, it is important to see the true cause of the child’s internal tension and overcome it, and not fight with tears as a consequence. Often a child becomes whiny during age crises (one year, three and seven years). Once the crisis period is overcome, such tearfulness usually goes away on its own.

How to react?

Sometimes children's tears are not an expression of internal tension or weakness, but only a way of behavior that has proven effective. Observe in what situations the child begins to cry. If tears always appear only in some situation parental ban and restrictions (but, for example, a sad cartoon does not make a child cry), and crying often turns into hysterics - it is worth thinking about why this method of influence became for the child effective way get your way from your parents.

A small child does not consciously manipulate tears, but if his experience shows that tears can always achieve the cancellation of demands and the fulfillment of desires, this method often becomes his “weapon.”

Separately, it is worth mentioning the more serious causes of children's tearfulness. For example, we are talking about childhood depression or experiences of violence. If you notice that your child has suddenly become very whiny, tense, his interest in life has decreased and he has stopped engaging in hobbies, communication with family and friends has decreased, nervous tics, nightmares and other serious symptoms have appeared, it makes sense to contact a child psychologist for help. detailed diagnosis of the child’s emotional state.

Love your children and try to understand the cause, not to eradicate the consequences.

Increased tearfulness and moodiness in children

Of course, all children are capricious from time to time - some more often, some less often. But sometimes parents notice that the child has become too capricious and whiny, and without any clearly defined reason. Increased moodiness in a child causes a lot of trouble and takes a lot of energy from adults. Why did the child become whiny and how to properly raise a capricious child so that the stigma of a “crybaby” is not stuck to him?

Reasons why a child became very capricious and whiny

The tearfulness of children is one of the most powerful irritants for parents. At the same time, the tears and cries of a baby can evoke a variety of emotions in adults, from the desire to help to despair and rage.

It’s worth mentioning right away that children’s excitability is several times stronger than that of an adult. This is a completely normal phenomenon, since the baby’s psyche has not yet had time to fully form. An occasion that is trivial for an adult can turn into a real tragedy for a child. The baby reacts with tears to all those moments that are associated in his mind with negativity. Crying for him is an expression of emotions that he does not yet know how to restrain. However, parents can be sure that the child is able to very quickly switch from bad to good and forget that he was upset about something just a minute ago.

Parents need to treat their offspring's tears as calmly as possible. The younger the child, the more often he will express his problems through tears. If the child is very capricious and whiny, tears appear in the eyes too often, then there may be several reasons for this.

First of all, the reasons for children's tearfulness are related to temperament or individual personality characteristics. The fact is that by nature every person has a weak or strong nervous system. If a person has weak nerves, then even in adulthood he will differ from others by increased sensitivity, a tendency to melancholic manifestations, etc. In children this can be more pronounced - from the first days they have increased excitability, sleep poorly and cry very often .

But sometimes it happens that a child suddenly becomes capricious - why does this happen? This may be due to some kind of stress, for example, conflicts in kindergarten or school, parental divorce, or family quarrels. All this can significantly weaken the child’s psyche and make the baby more excitable. Quite often, a child becomes capricious due to crises associated with peculiarities age development personality - for example, at the age of one, three and seven years. You can ignore such tears; over time, this tearfulness will disappear by itself.

Another reason why a child is very capricious is internal tension, which becomes a behavioral form of the child, which turns out to be quite effective so that he can attract attention to himself at any time. Parents need to monitor their baby and find out in what situations he begins to get upset and whine. If tears appear when parents forbid something to their child or limit him in something, and crying often develops into hysterics, then you should think about why such behavior has become the norm for him.

However, it should be remembered that the reasons why a child became whiny can be quite serious. For example, if a child becomes depressed or has experienced violence. If parents notice that the child has suddenly become whiny, capricious and tense, he has lost interest in life and in the things that previously fascinated him, or that he is beginning to experience nightmares, nervous tics or other serious symptoms, then in this case Parents need to go with their child to a psychologist. A specialist will help identify the reason why children become capricious and give recommendations for treatment.

Remember, children's whims are a more serious phenomenon compared to tearfulness and even hysterics. In fact, this behavior represents the truest manifestation of the dictatorship of the weak. A baby, with the help of screams, tears, etc., can control his parents and achieve what he wants from them. Adults, seeing this behavior of their child, are ready to do anything to make him stop being capricious.

How to cope with a capricious child and wean him from crying

Parents may notice that the child reacts very sharply to sad episodes in movies and cartoons, to screams and noises, and cries if he is told a scary fairy tale. Adults often do not quite correctly perceive the tears of a child with weak nerves: they begin to make fun of him, urge him to stop crying, etc.

This should not be done, because self-doubt will further develop in the child, and tearfulness will not disappear. Over time, the child’s psyche will become stronger, the child’s increased tearfulness will decrease, he will be able to control himself, and there will be fewer and fewer tears. In this case, it is useful for parents to consciously focus his attention on the positive aspects of life, trying to switch him from negativity to something positive.

Parents are often afraid of capriciousness in children, so they begin to suppress the child from the very beginning and do not allow his independence to develop. It is worth saying that the development of a child’s psyche cannot take place without the emergence of various kinds of conflict situations. Often, such whims arise when a child is prohibited from doing something, and with the help of indignation and disagreement he tries to defend his independence.

In addition, hysteria is a great way to attract the attention of adults. It happens that the mother goes about her business all the time, not paying attention to the child, and the father is constantly at work. Due to this state of affairs, the baby has to act somehow. He chooses the simplest path and throws a tantrum just to get a certain amount of parental attention.

How to deal with a capricious child and prevent him from turning into a crybaby? If the child is treated correctly, then the tantrum itself is not dangerous. Parents simply need to prepare for such behavior from their child. First of all, you will have to spend a lot of time and effort to teach your child to resolve conflicts and disputes without tears; in addition, thanks to this approach, the child will be able to painlessly overcome one of the most important transition periods development of your personality. However, it should be remembered that he also needs to set a personal example.

There are several basic methods for weaning a child from tearfulness and coping with children’s whims. Hysteria is much easier to prevent than to deal with its consequences later. If mom or dad feel that the child is about to burst into tears, then you need to switch his attention from the danger zone to a positive or at least neutral one. You should not shout at him; you should speak in a friendly tone, while parents need to remain calm. And, in addition, you should constantly give the child enough attention.

How to deal with a capricious child and re-educate a crybaby

If you don’t know how to behave with a capricious child, use the following recommendations from psychologists. If it was still not possible to avoid whims, then, first of all, the child must be isolated from witnesses who can see his hysterics. The fact is that very often children work for the public. The baby needs to be taken out of the room where the other adults have gathered. You can only let him back in if he has calmed down. This action often helps to achieve the most positive results in the shortest time.

When a baby begins to act up in a crowded place, for example in a store, you must firmly ignore any manifestations of hysteria. The child should be told that the conversation with him will take place only after he calms down.

However, before using such methods, you need to make sure that the baby’s psyche is developing in a normal way. Such methods will not work on a child with a weak nervous system; they can only worsen his condition.

You need to re-educate a capricious child as quickly as possible. Parents should demonstrate their disapproval of their child's behavior in every possible way. For example, after another tantrum, a mother may say before going to the store that she was very upset by his behavior the last time. For this reason, she now takes the child with her, hoping that he made the right conclusions after that incident. It must be remembered that all the demands the baby makes during a tantrum must be ignored. Otherwise, such phenomena will happen more and more often.

The child should learn to manage and recognize his emotions. During his whims, you can ask him leading questions so that he can understand the reason for the tears. Parents should offer him alternative ways to express his emotions. For example, a baby may start tearing an old newspaper or jumping on one leg if he is very angry about something. He should explain that adults also experience similar emotions, but find the strength not to express them so clearly.

Parents must be consistent always and everywhere, especially if the child is near them. You need to behave very calmly in public, especially at home. Children perfectly feel those moments when their whims will have the greatest impact on their parents. Once they understand in which situation mom or dad are least firm, all their efforts will be directed precisely to that place.

An important point in how to raise a capricious child is approval of calm behavior. When a child has managed to cope with his anger or some stressful situation, he needs to be praised and encouraged. In the future, this method should be resorted to if the baby tries to throw a tantrum again. The baby needs to be hugged, kissed and praised as often as possible. It is parents who have the primary influence on children’s self-esteem and sense of self.

To avoid hysterics, you need to develop the baby’s will from early childhood. At the same time, will is not the ability to insist on one’s own at any cost, but the ability to cope with emerging difficulties. Children need to be taught to dress themselves, make the bed, wipe the dust, put away toys, etc. In order to prevent hysterics, it is very convenient to apply the rule of the third bell, i.e. parents begin to talk about the end of something in advance. In addition, the child should be given the opportunity to understand the feelings of other people. The sooner he starts doing this, the easier he will be able to fit into the society around him.

Hello, dear readers! Children are happiness, but they are not always ready to share exclusively positive emotions. For some parents, a baby's crying turns into a real ordeal. It is difficult to understand what to do and how to react, remaining calm with each new hysteria that arises out of nowhere becomes more and more difficult.

The topic of our article today will be: a whiny child, what to do. I will tell you what you should never do, and also give you some tips that will help calm your baby and correct his behavior. The recommendations will be universal and will be useful if your child is from 2 years old to almost 9 years old.

Since my blog is dedicated to psychology, I would like to start with methods that definitely do not work, but only aggravate the situation and can be detrimental to your baby’s psyche. You simply need to know such things.

How not to react

In addition to the cause of concern, which the child himself may not understand, there will also be resentment towards mom or dad. You probably already understand how he will throw it out.

Childhood is a period when all the complexes are formed in the baby and psychological traumas “for life” appear. This must be remembered. Any phrase you say accidentally in a fit of anger can be remembered by your child for the rest of his life. Remain an adult and, if a child at 5-6 years old says that it would be better if he had other parents, you should not answer him in the same way and claim that you yourself would not mind changing him for another child.

How to react

There can be many reasons for tearfulness in a child, from the most basic, which you can read about in my previous article. The baby has become whiny because he is growing up, getting older, his worldview is changing and his guidelines are shifting, he is learning to build relationships in society and is looking for the most optimal models of behavior.

It doesn’t always make sense to look for “adult” causes of children’s bad mood(lack of attention, material resources, desire to relax at sea, and so on). The reason will not necessarily be depression, or the influence of negative relationships in the family. Of course, if you suspect that this is possible, you need to talk to your child in a calm environment, find out what is bothering him.

To establish contact with your child, I can recommend you a book Elaine Mazlish“How to talk so that children will listen, and how to listen so that children will talk”.

There will be dialogue the best way establish the true causes of the problem and. You can once again show that he is dear to you and you will always be there to help him in any situation. If nothing comes of this idea, you can take your child to a psychologist. At this age, children are open. Establishing contact with him is not so difficult, and such practices turn out to be very useful for the child’s psyche.

By the way, this method will be useful in any case. Even if there is no specific reason for the baby’s tearfulness, a specialist will help you see the shortcomings of this one and choose a more useful one in life.

How to deal with hysterics

Everything is clear with a global solution to the problem, but what about when it has already begun? For many parents, this issue is very relevant, so I can’t ignore it. First, you need to make every effort to calm down. Your state of mind should pass on to the child and set him on a constructive path.

The task is difficult, and therefore I advise you to read the book Thich Nhat Hanh "Calm in a world full of noise". It contains basic meditation techniques that can restore peace to you in a few minutes. I think this will be useful not only in your relationship with your child.

After you become a little calmer, you can try to talk about what worries the child. Talk to your child like an adult. Even if he is worried about something you think is nonsense, for example, someone on the playground took his toy, try to take the problem seriously. The baby takes his trouble as seriously as your friend would take her husband’s departure for his mistress.

If talking doesn't help and your words aren't very convincing, try to switch your child's attention to something else. Offer to go to the park, ride on a swing, or show a cat running past.

That's all for me. See you again and don't forget to subscribe to the newsletter.

Parents really want to see their children happy! Their ringing laughter, joyful eyes, and optimism help adults feel uplifted. But what to do if you have whiny child? If a child takes many events in his life too close to heart, gets offended and cries in response to criticism?

Firstly, psychologists say that increased emotionality is not a pathology. It is human nature to express their feelings, and while adults have learned to manage them, small children have not. So tearfulness may indicate that your child is a sensitive type of personality; these are often called “thin-skinned people.” Perhaps he has an increased sensitivity to the arts, to the emotions of other people, they are more understanding, compassionate, and deep.

Secondly, it’s worth taking a closer look: what if some traumatic situation is repeated in the child’s life? For example, his classmates are offending him, but he doesn’t tell you about it? Nerves are always on edge, and if he feels excessive harshness in your criticism, tears break out on their own.

A child’s inadequate reaction to all irritants indiscriminately is interpreted as a deviation from the norm: he scratched his knee - tears, his mother asked him to help around the house - the same thing, they didn’t allow him to turn on the TV because he didn’t do his homework - sobs. This is exactly the case when it is worth contacting a psychologist and correcting the child’s behavior with special procedures. Just not with violence, as some parents decide, immediately grabbing the belt: this can make him a chronic neurasthenic.

Why do children cry?

Here are some reasons why whiny child gets upset to tears:

• Lack of attention. If parents spend little time with their children, they begin to experience attention deficit. In an effort to get it, they are ready to do anything, even hysterics, if only their mother would hug them and say a kind word. Children surrounded by the care and affection of loved ones, as a rule, rarely show instability or cry

• Vulnerability, . It was said above that a hypersensitive type of perception is characteristic of some children. The task of parents, educators, and teachers is to calmly and kindly explain to them what happens in life. different cases. Even if something not entirely good happened, you shouldn’t be upset, because it ends. Gradually, the severity of the experience will decrease, and the child will stop crying over trifles.

• Harsh criticism from adults. Notice how you criticize your child? Do you want to hurt him more? Are you carried away by comparisons: “Igorek is a great guy, but you’re a chump and a poor student!”? A word can hurt more than physical punishment, and children are especially sensitive to this effect. Be more merciful to them, even if your parents once raised you this way

• . It is noticed that whiny child in a prosperous family - a rarity, and where quarrels are frequent, clarification of relations between parents is a frequent occurrence. Children do not feel safe in such an environment, so they are nervous and worried. Along with tearfulness, they may develop more serious emotional disorders

How to help your child cope with emotions?

First, understand what takes your child out of balance. If the cause is clear, all you have to do is fix it. For example, if these are the actions of some other child who is terrorizing yours, minimize their contacts, talk to the teacher or educator, explain to your own son or daughter how to properly respond to provocations.

Give your baby a feeling of protection: it comes when the child feels loved and needed. Hug him more often, talk to him sweet words, spend time with him.

Do not encourage attempts to manipulate you: if the baby cries to get away from a well-deserved punishment, let him calm down and have an educational conversation in an even voice.

Do not rush to console a child in a state of hysterics! Frantically demanding his own, he thus seeks to put pressure on you. Don't give in. And when he calms down, explain why you will not fulfill his request given this behavior.

N Do not use the words “bawl-cow”, “crybaby-wax” and others, do not laugh at the child. By doing this you affect his sense of self-worth. Be constructive. Then the whiniest child , Eventually, he will learn to control himself.